Confusedumpee Posted June 5, 2017 Share Posted June 5, 2017 We broke up since a month and a half ago, haven't met him since.. I miss our dog terribly, but I know my ex didn't want to see me. He told me that I can contact his mum and I can go over to visit the dog as he's barely at home (always hanging out with his friends) But I was worried that it might be awkward. I only did NC for about a week, should I do it for a month before trying to contact him? I hurt him alot in our previous relationship. Please advice me! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mustlovedogs Posted June 5, 2017 Share Posted June 5, 2017 Do you miss the dog or him? Be honest with yourself. Now, if he's never home, perhaps you could keep the dog? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Seraphim Posted June 5, 2017 Share Posted June 5, 2017 Going to visit the dog is just delaying the inevitable. You also can't explain it to the dog . Coming and going might just add anxiety to the dog . Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Confusedumpee Posted June 5, 2017 Author Share Posted June 5, 2017 I miss both of them. The dog is like my own Daughter.. He don't bear to give her to me. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Confusedumpee Posted June 5, 2017 Author Share Posted June 5, 2017 Going to visit the dog is just delaying the inevitable. You also can't explain it to the dog . Coming and going might just add anxiety to the dog . So I Guess I need to forget about my dog.. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mustlovedogs Posted June 5, 2017 Share Posted June 5, 2017 Slow down. Why does he get all the rights to the dog? Did you discuss it during the breakup? Did you adopt her together? If he's barely at home, then you should have her. You could talk to him about it. But don't use it as an excuse to try and re establish consistent contact. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Confusedumpee Posted June 5, 2017 Author Share Posted June 5, 2017 Slow down. Why does he get all the rights to the dog? Did you discuss it during the breakup? Did you adopt her together? If he's barely at home, then you should have her. You could talk to him about it. But don't use it as an excuse to try and re establish consistent contact. I used to stay at my ex's house. We adopted her together, in fact I was the one who's always taking care of her, now it's his Mother who's taking care. Maybe I should try to talk to him about it. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Seraphim Posted June 5, 2017 Share Posted June 5, 2017 One or the other needs to keep the dog. Animals can't reason why people come and go and come and go. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mustlovedogs Posted June 5, 2017 Share Posted June 5, 2017 One or the other needs to keep the dog. Animals can't reason why people come and go and come and go. I agree. I never said anything about joint custody. But if she wants the dog and his mom has the dog, then why not? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Seraphim Posted June 5, 2017 Share Posted June 5, 2017 She would have to negotiate that. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mustlovedogs Posted June 5, 2017 Share Posted June 5, 2017 She would have to negotiate that. Right, I said that Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Seraphim Posted June 5, 2017 Share Posted June 5, 2017 I was telling the OP though not to confuse the dog. They are not like kids that come to understand that mom and dad are divorced . They are dogs . And they don't understand people coming and going and causes them anxiety and behaviour problems. It was more a comment to her. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Confusedumpee Posted June 5, 2017 Author Share Posted June 5, 2017 Guys.. my ex did not reply to my text lol. It's been 9 hours. So it's pretty obvious he's ignoring me now. Oh well.. nothing I can do about it. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
No1 Posted June 5, 2017 Share Posted June 5, 2017 I see 3 options. 1.-You let him and the dog go. 2.-you go to court for custody of the dog 3.-You go out and buy another dog. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Starlight925 Posted June 5, 2017 Share Posted June 5, 2017 My boyfriend shares a dog with an ex, and it's created a whole world of problems. When they split up (he left her), he was obviously single. He dated for a couple of years, nothing seemed to stick, but once he met me, all h*ll broke loose with her, as she realizes I might stay around. All of a sudden, she's turned into a nightmare, so the poor dog is in the middle of all this drama. The dog is undisciplined, constantly sick, going to the vet several times a month. Sweetest, cutest dog around, but the dog won't eat for days, isn't house trained, and doesn't have a real home. Please don't do this to a dog. Once one of you finds someone else, this will be more than difficult to maintain, and you will be putting the dog in the middle. My BF adores his dog, which I completely respect, but his ex pines away for him and still thinks she's in his and his family's life, and she can't/won't move on, because she sees my ex once a week when he picks up the dog. So for her, even though it's been 7 years since he first moved out, she still isn't letting herself move on. Had they split up like any other couple, and had they gone NC, she'd likely have moved on by now and had another boyfriend. I'm just serving as the canary in the coal mine: I know you love your dog. So, either find a lawyer so that you can get the dog back, or give up (I know it's hard) and get yourself a new puppy. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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