Tired of Feeling DAMAGED

[Dominique]

I am so tired of being lonely and in pain and feeling empty. When I try to interact with people I feel so damaged like I don't even know who I am anymore.

 

This divorce is exhausting and my husband makes it harder every step

of the way. It's not fair. I try to be a decent person. I even have his expense classic car in my garage to save him/us money on storage. He is so evil and I am so lonely.

 

My husband's destruction has ruined me and the one relationship with My Luv ....the one person I was proud and happy with for the first time in years is gone now because I can't hold myself together long enough to bond again and my Luv's ex wife was the same way. She Took everything from him....So both me and my Luv are just a mess and barely breathing.

 

I've been separated three years and it's like this just won't end.

 

I miss being a whole person instead of this shell.

 

Anyone else recovering from this feeling empty ?

[lonestarsky]

I'm so sorry, your situation sounds awful. I've only just split from my boyfriend and although I'm devastated I'm hoping the pain will heal soon. To have lived with this for three years must be a nightmare. I can't even imagine it, I've been feeling this pain for a week, and that feels like long enough. I'm sending you love and strength, I really do feel for you 😞💚

[LordRorek]

You are not the person you were and you never will be that person again.

 

There is an old saying on the Iron Islands "What is dead may never die, but rises harder and stronger."

 

And like a Phoenix a new you will rise from the ashes and light up the whole world.

 

I am praying for your healing, health, and happiness.

 

P.S. As far as your luv is concerned just be patient. You both are in pain and it will take time before you two are ready to truly follow your hearts.

[Dominique]

I'm so sorry, your situation sounds awful. I've only just split from my boyfriend and although I'm devastated I'm hoping the pain will heal soon. To have lived with this for three years must be a nightmare. I can't even imagine it, I've been feeling this pain for a week, and that feels like long enough. I'm sending you love and strength, I really do feel for you 😞💚

 

Sending you love and light. Thanks for your message. 💙

[Dominique]

You are not the person you were and you never will be that person again.

 

There is an old saying on the Iron Islands "What is dead may never die, but rises harder and stronger."

 

And like a Phoenix a new you will rise from the ashes and light up the whole world.

 

I am praying for your healing, health, and happiness.

 

P.S. As far as your luv is concerned just be patient. You both are in pain and it will take time before you two are ready to truly follow your hearts.

 

I know you are right. I am just so tired. So hurt. So broken. This is truly so difficult. It takes my breath away some days.

[LordRorek]

Yeah you're situation is particularly gruesome.

 

What with the divorce and everything. But don't give up hope.

 

We are all here for you and I am praying for you. 😊

[JustinPonders]

Hi Dominique

 

I saw a video that was pretty interesting. Dunno if I can link it here but you might want to watch this. The story is pretty similar to yours Dominque.

 

[Dominique]

Yeah you're situation is particularly gruesome.

 

What with the divorce and everything. But don't give up hope.

 

We are all here for you and I am praying for you. 😊

 

 

I appreciate the support here. Today was a really bad day with my husband and I am just praying for this to be over soon. He is so awful to me. I just can't imagine what I did to deserve this anguish.

 

I'm thinking of you too. Whenever you post I feel your deep pain and I want you to know that I always send you love and light. I want you to recover and heal. I want you to be with someone who appreciates you.

[Dominique]

Hi Dominique

 

I saw a video that was pretty interesting. Dunno if I can link it here but you might want to watch this. The story is pretty similar to yours Dominque.

]

 

Omg! I am literally watching another one of his videos as I checked this post!!!! That's insane that you sent me this. I can't believe the coincidence of this.

 

I'm so humbled. Thank u❤️

[figureitout23]

 

My husband's destruction has ruined me and the one relationship with My Luv ....the one person I was proud and happy with for the first time in years is gone now because I can't hold myself together long enough to bond again and my Luv's ex wife was the same way. She Took everything from him....So both me and my Luv are just a mess and barely breathing.

 

I say this at the risk of being seen as heartless, but I feel like it has to be said. Please believe me when I say I am in no way trying to 'kick you when you're down'.

 

Dominique... are you maybe in denial about things? Or are you maybe idealizing your ex? I only ask because in reading your story it seems to jump around a bit. You say its your ex husbands fault you and your ex aren't together...but weren't you separated ~before~ your divorce started to get nasty? Wasn't he briefly seeing someone else? Wasn't his divorce rough first?

 

It seems TO ME if the only issue was your divorces, you two would be able to figure something out. It just doesn't add up for you to be in this much pain and agony if the both of you still wanted this relationship. This isn't the movies, life isn't all that complicated. If a man wants to be with you, come hell or high-water, he will be. Heck, I'm watching dateline right now and a man is on trial for killing his wife so he can marry his long time secret girlfriend. I'm not saying you or your ex would do this, simply making a point, if two people want to be together, they will be together. Remind yourself of this please, don't sit here blaming yourself or thinking if this changed or if this were different or ect ect ect didn't happen, ID BE HAPPY! That's nothing but bargaining and its not helpful to your health. ((hugs)) I know its hard, divorce and that first breakup post divorce, I know cause I'm going through it myself and it ain't easy. If I'm completely off I apologize, but if there is some truth to what I said maybe give it some consideration.

 

P.S YOU'RE FAR FROM DAMAGED!!!!!

[Dominique]

My ex Luv and I are both a mess right now. He was a mess first and then my mess came shortly thereafter. I see what you're saying and I agree. I'm not blaming my husband. I'm blaming the situation of our ugly divorces throwing us into depression and financial distress beyond belief. I don't think I'm idealizing anything. I am willing to consider your point though. Truly.

 

Unfortunately, we are a mess right now. My Luv went through a horrible custody fight and property settlement and legal battle that just shredded him. Two months after we broke up he had a fling with someone at his work. I think a fling is easier right now to deal with. But it's not for me to say or care what he is doing. I'm just looking at the situation.

 

I'm a shell right now. After the crap I went through this week, as much as I love and miss my ex, I was glad I wasn't coming home to him. I'm glad the detective who is following me for my husband is not seeing me with my Luv and taking pictures and that my husband isn't harassing him and his friends.

 

It may seem uncomplicated and easy to say "if you want to be together just do it". But I can honestly say as much as I want to be with him, I don't want him dealing with this. I am willing to sacrifice that to avoid taking him and his children through this with me. Now I totally understand why he kept telling me that none of this was fair to me when he was going through all his drama.

 

When we broke up he was a mess. We tried for months to hold our relationship together. He kept telling me he was being unfair to me, and honestly, it was taking its toll on me. The drama of his wife was unbearable at times. Especially since she cheated and she left him for someone else. It seemed so unfair and just beyond comprehension to me how she was dragging him through the mud. I would come home and call him and he would be just sick and tired.

 

He was working two jobs to pay legal bills and it was just hard to maintain "us". He almost wrecked one night coming home late from working two jobs at 4am.

 

I don't expect anyone to understand how complex this is. But I appreciate your perspective and I appreciate you trying to help me. I really do.

 

In the end, I'll be ok at some point and so will my Luv. And if we aren't together, I'll just have to live with that. I just want us to be happy and our kids to be happy. The rest is just what it is....😔

[Dominique]

@figureitout23

 

You mentioned that you are going through something similar. I'm sorry to know that and i am sending you light and love. No one should hurt like this. 💙