LifeasMe Posted June 2, 2017 Share Posted June 2, 2017 who does this??? I haven't seen my ex (2-year relationship) for two years. He broke up with me. After around 6-8 months complete NC, there's been sporadic texts where I've recently stopped being angry at him, he always initiates the conversation. The latter end of the relationship was long distance, he moved for work and has become really successful. I've refused all requests to meet when he's been back in town. During the course of text chat we talked about my holiday with my girlfriends. Months ago he jokingly asked if he could gatecrash, I said absolutely not. No more was said on the subject until the day before I'm due to fly out, he tells me he's booked to come too... same resort, same hotel, same dates. There was zero encouragement from me before this happened. Initial anger subsides, I decide to try and make the most of it for all parties. We meet for drinks, girlfriends tease and quiz him about dumping me, then leave us alone. During the chat he makes it clear I'm the ideal woman for him, I made him so happy blah blah... but he still can't be in a relationship. He's not been with anyone else in the time we've been apart. I had a casual 6 month relationship. He pays for me - and my girlfriends - for a few dinner and drinks dates, under duress on our part in terms of who pays, during his stay. But conversation turns sour on last group 'date', he sulks... he also ignored a few house rules we agreed at the start. My girlfriends are not best pleased and I have a heated discussion with him about his selfishness and lack of consideration. We decide not to part on a sour note and spend his last day alone together, with no relationship talk. Have a fabulous action-packed fun day. Now we're both upset. Mutual attraction still there, but he still can't commit to a relationship. There was no romantic interludes or sex during this holiday. Now we're both back in limbo. Feelings are back, I'm sad, he's upset he's made me sad. He flies home tomorrow, I've a few more days thankfully. He's agreed to see a therapist to sort out his issues... I'm just flummoxed. I don't even think I have a question, I just needed to vent. We're late 30s/mid 40s. You'd think we'd learn by now!!! Link to comment
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