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Jibralta
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PS - have a friend extremely locally, she lives round the corner, who has a huge, I mean huge, country mansion, and she is re-modelling it from ground up, the full works, knocking things through, adding interesting building work here and there. She has an architect and building firm employed full time for the next year.

 

She works part time for a famous fashion brand organising the creative side of it and her husband is a partner in a law firm.

 

Ever thought about branching out and taking on your own private projects? People in London still want their basements converted into huge gyms and dive pools and all the like!

 

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6 hours ago, Jibralta said:

Construction is one of the leading indicators of an economic slowdown. We are all keenly aware. They told us in our Monday morning meeting that we better start getting flexible about the kinds of work we are doing if we want to stay employed. The owners are astute. The company will survive. But some of our jobs may not. I really like working here, but I think it's time to start looking around....

Yeah, it seems a big recession is ahead of us. It's wise to start looking around just to be ready if necessary. Hope you are doing fine Jib 🙂

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23 hours ago, mylolita said:

Might be a blessing in disguise Jib you just never know with these things

I feel like, economically, in the next year or so, we might be looking on much brighter days. I am feeling very optimistic about the future!

Wanna come work on a Victorian property in England? 🥲🫡

 

x

Is that a yes? 🤣🤣🤣

 

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16 hours ago, dias said:

Hope you are doing fine Jib 🙂

I am, thanks 🙂

23 hours ago, mylolita said:

I feel like, economically, in the next year or so, we might be looking on much brighter days. I am feeling very optimistic about the future!

Me too, weirdly. But I think there will probably be an upheaval along the way. It just so happens that my industry tracks the economy very closely and has little insulation against those upheavals.

23 hours ago, Batya33 said:

I think it's smart to look around.  Also what I like and hope you feel reassured by is that you and your work are valued so if you do look around it's even more of a reason to interview with confidence that any new company would be fortunate to have you.  

Thanks. I do feel more confident. I really turned things around for myself in the last five years. I've taken what some might have considered a setback or even a loss (being sidetracked for years in a related field) and turned it into an saleable asset. Employers really like my resume.

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12 minutes ago, mylolita said:

Is that a yes? 🤣🤣🤣

Ha. Not in the near future. Although I have actually always considered becoming licensed in the UK and possibly moving there. And, coincidentally, Arnold has dual citizenship, so it is a real possibility.

But... I just googled salaries for licensed architects in the UK and they do not seem very good. However, the pound is currently very close to the dollar in value. Maybe that's un-updated data is from when the pound was a lot higher than the dollar.

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2 minutes ago, Jibralta said:

Ha. Not in the near future. Although I have actually always considered becoming licensed in the UK and possibly moving there. And, coincidentally, Arnold has dual citizenship, so it is a real possibility.

But... I just googled salaries for licensed architects in the UK and they do not seem very good. However, the pound is currently very close to the dollar in value. Maybe that's un-updated data is from when the pound was a lot higher than the dollar.

No, you’re right! The pound was always strong in the past. To work it out you roughly used to take away half (I used to think, $100 was roughly £55 quid, something like that) ohhh now it’s much much closer! 
 

Ya never know Jib, ya never know! 🥲

 

I don’t want to diminish your feelings at the moment, but you’ll be fine, you really will x

 

 

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17 hours ago, dias said:

Yeah, it seems a big recession is ahead of us. It's wise to start looking around just to be ready if necessary. Hope you are doing fine Jib 🙂

I’ve personally decided to have no part of this recession thing and I won’t hear of it 🤣

 

I also will not get older, it’s just not happening, and I’ll depart this world only when I’ve had enough.

 

I suggest you just take those steps, it’s like, a one step programme invented by me. You just say - no, I won’t have it. Turn on your heels and continue to be fabulous, regardless of anything or any what else  - LOL! 
 

Some call it wilful ignorance but I just say - don’t take your insecurities out on me, babe. Chill that bean 🤣

 

@Jibralta I hope you are liking my sage advice here and give me plenty of likes this stuff is solid gold 🤪
 

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20 minutes ago, mylolita said:

Some call it wilful ignorance but I just say - don’t take your insecurities out on me, babe. Chill that bean 🤣

I like to live in denial too 😎

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On 11/16/2022 at 7:14 AM, Jibralta said:

another project is drawing to a close (in the most chaotic way--terrible contractor, unfortunately)

I had a site visit for this project today. After the visit, I realized I forgot the ticket I needed to get my car out of the lot.

I wasn't worried, they've given me my car before without a ticket. But this time was different. The guy was like, "How do I know it's your car?" 

I offered to show him my ID and registration, but he refused. He was really unreasonable. Especially since I've gotten my car from that lot before without a ticket.

Long story short, I flipped the fck out on the guy. Yelling, cursing, threatening. But just as I was starting to get really warmed up, an employee sitting in the booth behind him got up and gave me my car keys.

I left there feeling exhilarated. I'm still feeling amped. I haven't had a good fight in a long time and I forgot I like to fight!

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7 hours ago, Jibralta said:

I had a site visit for this project today. After the visit, I realized I forgot the ticket I needed to get my car out of the lot.

I wasn't worried, they've given me my car before without a ticket. But this time was different. The guy was like, "How do I know it's your car?" 

I offered to show him my ID and registration, but he refused. He was really unreasonable. Especially since I've gotten my car from that lot before without a ticket.

Long story short, I flipped the fck out on the guy. Yelling, cursing, threatening. But just as I was starting to get really warmed up, an employee sitting in the booth behind him got up and gave me my car keys.

I left there feeling exhilarated. I'm still feeling amped. I haven't had a good fight in a long time and I forgot I like to fight!

Jobsworths!! THE WORST KIND!

 

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On 11/18/2022 at 2:23 AM, mylolita said:

Jobsworths!!

Yeah, that's the thing. I actually had to google that term but it describes the situation exactly. He wasn't 'doing his job,' he was using his (ostensible) 'position of power' to be unhelpful and obstructive.

I understand the initial concern of someone stealing a car from the lot by pretending to be the owner. But I offered my ID and my vehicle registration (which has the car's VIN #) and he still said "no." At that point, I was like, "Ok buddy, you don't now own my car because I forgot a piece of paper. That's not how it works. Do I need to call the cops to come and verify my ID and registration for you?" He was like, "Call the cops, it won't help."

That's when I got mad. I could think of a million ways to dismantle his idiot logic and hand him the pathetic components of his inner absurdity. I got right to work. It wasn't much of an argument to be honest. He couldn't say much because he had no true authority or justification. He could only stand there and stupidly tower over me. And pretty soon I was going to kick him in the kneecaps so he wouldn't be doing much more towering. 

A few minutes into dressing the guy down, I realized that my threat to call the cops had gotten to him more than he'd initially let on. I don't remember exactly what I said, but his response was, "Well, you said you were going to call the cops," as if I had pushed the issue to the point of no return by making that threat. I think I actually smiled when he said that--it told me a lot about him. No, buddy. You did this when you refused to take my ID and registration as proof. That was your out. But you wanted to fight instead.

Idiot.

It was heartening to discover that he was just a dumb bully. And it was heartening to see evidence that he was out of his depth against me. But he still wasn't backing down. So, I kept hammering him. I felt like I still had a lot of ammo at my disposal. He was going to fall like a big tree because he was stupidly inflexible.

Then the man behind him in the kiosk got up to help me. My rage vanished. As he walked me to my car with my keys, I saw there had been a group of people standing behind me. A woman smiled kindly at me. I smiled back, completely forgetting my altercation with the big dumb ox I left behind in the kiosk. I was totally calm. The fight took almost no effort on my part.

I think the most interesting takeaway from that whole experience was discovering that I still have a lot of fight in me. Rallying was as easy as standing still.

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I’m really sorry this happened. He was being a bully. Of course your license and registration should be enough. Please be safe out there. Confronting when you don’t know how he can retaliate might not be the safest plan.  I’m sorry it happened 

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On 11/20/2022 at 8:46 AM, Batya33 said:

Please be safe out there. Confronting when you don’t know how he can retaliate might not be the safest plan.

True. I was not happy to be in that situation. I felt really stuck. I didn't have high hopes that the cops would even show up (if it came to that). The only other thing I could think of doing was have Arnold drive up with my spare set of keys and drive my car through their gate lol. Either way, I'd be waiting in the cold. The temperature had dropped sharply since I'd first arrived. I was freezing and my jacket was in my car. I was really at a loss, to be honest.

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2 hours ago, Jibralta said:

True. I was not happy to be in that situation. I felt really stuck. I didn't have high hopes that the cops would even show up (if it came to that). The only other thing I could think of doing was have Arnold drive up with my spare set of keys and drive my car through their gate lol. Either way, I'd be waiting in the cold. The temperature had dropped sharply since I'd first arrived. I was freezing and my jacket was in my car. I was really at a loss, to be honest.

I am so so sorry you were in this situation. It’s so frustrating and just wrong. I cannot stand when people abuse power in this way. 

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On 11/22/2022 at 5:14 PM, Jibralta said:

The only other thing I could think of doing was have Arnold drive up with my spare set of keys and drive my car through their gate lol.

Actually, now that I think about it, Arnold didn't have a car on November 17. His had been totaled two weeks before. So, my back was really against the wall! 

ANYWAY....It's over.

MOVING ON!!

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I really like Michelle Gurevich, her ironic lyrics, and dark melodies.

You must know that moment
When the miserable world cracks open
You finally meet someone
Suddenly the chapter's written

Six months with nothing other
Than a duvet and a jug of water
It's a chemical jackpot babe
And we've got the winning number

Give me the first six months of love
Give me the first six months of love
Before the truth comes spilling out
Before you open your big mouth
One of the finest things in life
Gone on a serotonin ride
God knows I've waited long enough
Give me the first six months
First six months of love
Before begin the dissections
Before the therapy sessions
We danced the night we met
Now we need dancing lessons

Remember how it all began
We must not let habit set in
Come up the stairs, let's recommence
The first six months over again

Give me the first six months of love
Give me the first six months of love
Before the truth comes spilling out
Before you open your big mouth
One of the finest things in life
Gone on a serotonin ride
Babe if we gonna stick it out
Give me the first six months
First six months of love

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It doesn't matter what you create
If you have no fun
Pretty girl, put down your pen
Come over here
I'll show you how it's done
I can dance
I can drink
In the dark
It's all a trick
Across the room
Across the street
I'm in the moment
Can't you see?
I'm a party girl
Do a twirl
See my eyes throw a glance
Can't you see I'm a natural?
Life of a party girl
Funny girl
Make you laugh
Want me bad
Now I feel so much better
In the back of a car
I just met them tonight
And I feel like such a star
What's your name?
What's your art?
Nobody knows
About my broken heart
Yes, I'm a party girl
Crazy girl
See my lips how they move
Can't you see I'm a natural?
Life of a party girl
Sexy girl
I used to be so fragile
But now I'm so wild
What did you do last night?
Oh, I was out so late, now I'm so tired
What did you do last night?
Oh, I was out so late, now I'm so tired
I'm a party girl
Do a twirl
See my eyes throw a glance
Can't you see I'm a natural?
Life of a party girl
Funny girl
Make you laugh
Want me bad
Now I feel so much better
I used to cry
But now I don't have the time
I used to be so fragile
But now I'm so wild
I used to cry
But now I don't have the time
I used to be so fragile
But now I'm so wild
So wild

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Yesterday I did some grim math. 

According to conventional wisdom, each pound we gain or lose is equivalent to 3,500 calories.

So, 10 pounds is equal to 35,000 calories.

If I divide 35,000 by 365 days, it tells me that if I consume just 96 extra calories per day I could potentially gain 10 pounds by the end of the year. 48 extra calories per day will gain me 5 pounds.

On top of this, as you age, your caloric intake requirements decrease by about 5 calories per year. 

This is assuming no exercise, of course. But still. Holy sht.

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21 minutes ago, dias said:

Unfortunately your math is correct. It's very easy to gain weight, especially if you like food as much as me lol

Thing positive, you can simply consume 96 calories less 🙂

Oh I remember the first time I did that math over 40 years ago -I get it! Over the years I've gone back and forth as to whether it's that simple as calories in/calories out but that's for another day.  I do well with portion control as opposed to calorie counting and measuring which I was too intense about for over 5 years in my teenage/early 20s.  Remember when the 100 calorie snack packs started and were all the rage -that so feeds into-pun intended -the whole calorie counting/measuring thing.  

I love food/am a foodie but I am no longer into large portions of food or feeling full -that's now been true for me for many years so it helps.  I also dislike fried foods and can't eat doughnuts and can't eat croissants anymore so that helps.  

But honestly what I think helps more than I realize is genetics.  My dad was overweight but not extremely so but my mom and sister are and always have been naturally thin. My mom never dieted and was never overweight and to the contrary underweight.  She does watch what she eats for health reasons especially the last 20-30 years - as far as carbs/fats taking in enough iron/protein/fiber.  She just naturally eats enough, not too much and is also a foodie/loves food -she's almost 88!

I wish you the best Jibralta if you mean you're going to try to lose weight (not clear sorry!) and I hope you feel well!

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1 hour ago, Jibralta said:

Yesterday I did some grim math. 

According to conventional wisdom, each pound we gain or lose is equivalent to 3,500 calories.

So, 10 pounds is equal to 35,000 calories.

If I divide 35,000 by 365 days, it tells me that if I consume just 96 extra calories per day I could potentially gain 10 pounds by the end of the year. 48 extra calories per day will gain me 5 pounds.

On top of this, as you age, your caloric intake requirements decrease by about 5 calories per year. 

This is assuming no exercise, of course. But still. Holy sht.

Bleak! 🤣 Don't calculate anything to do with anything I intake!

I like to think I am the originally stumble across-er of the fasting some days and then eat what you want on the next. It's an accident, but it kept me very skinny for years but I ate anything I wanted, but not all the time. 

So one day, it's a coffee and smoothie and fresh air diet. The next day, it's fries and pizza, and whatever else I can get my hands on. Then the day after, probably, I would feel guilty and eat peas and next to nothing all over again. Highly disordered and absolutely unhealthy, but my figure was fab for it - LOL!

It depends how physical you are as well. If you're rushing about everywhere, and not sitting, you're gonna be able to eat more of course as ya know Jib. When I was dancing all the time, I could eat whatever I wanted almost, because I was burning thousands of calories a day, and was young, with a fast metabolism. 

I'm no one to talk about food though. I love it all, but I will always have a disordered view of the whole thing. I'm all or nothing about it. I can never just eat one cake. I'll go a few days without sugar then eat 7 doughnuts and have two rounds of McDonalds. I can't find a balance to any of it.

I think I like your weight loss theory! If someone looses it, someone else gains it in the world! HA! Excellent!

I've been 80lbs, I've been 150lbs during and after pregnancies. I feel best at about 8 stone, or 112lbs ish for the fellow peeps across the pond. If shopping and talking trash burnt calories, I'd be rail thin - LOL!


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6 hours ago, Batya33 said:

I wish you the best Jibralta if you mean you're going to try to lose weight (not clear sorry!) and I hope you feel well!

Thanks. I've gained a good 15 pounds (at times even more) since getting together with Arnold and I've never managed to take it off. Part of that is due to lack of activity--I stopped horseback riding around that time. That was intense exercise, and I never managed to adjust my appetite accordingly. I do go to the gym and lift weights, and I walk about 2 miles per day, but it's not enough. You can't out-exercise a bad diet.

I'm not terribly overweight. Actually, if you go by the BMI method, I'm not technically overweight at all.  But I am treading that line. And when I was at a doctor's appointment a couple of weeks ago I saw that my blood pressure was slightly elevated. Not anything to worry about, said the doctor. But to me that say my body is starting to change and I need to take care.

6 hours ago, Batya33 said:

Over the years I've gone back and forth as to whether it's that simple as calories in/calories out but that's for another day. 

As an armchair nutritionist, I can't 'weigh' in either (excuse the pun). Calorie counting certainly isn't the only effective approach to losing weight. But it is simple and measurable and right now I'm sick of the fads.

5 hours ago, mylolita said:

I think I like your weight loss theory! If someone looses it, someone else gains it in the world! HA! Excellent!

As an armchair scientist, I think I'm onto something with that. Conservation of mass is a cornerstone of physics.

6 hours ago, Batya33 said:

But honestly what I think helps more than I realize is genetics.

Yeah. It's good that I've finally met some of my biological relatives.

My biological mother's side has short women and tall men. They are slender people, but the women seem to get a bit heavy as they get older. 

My biological father's side has tall men and tall women. They have a more powerful, muscular build. 

I am of average height at 5'-6". But I get my musculature from my father's side.

I think having good muscle mass, staying active, and keeping a good diet will help me avoid gaining weight. 

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I wish you the best in weight loss and improving your health! My BP has now been slightly elevated for a few years. I've been monitoring it but honestly -just strapping on my home monitor raises my BP -it's "funny" but it's frustrating because then it takes longer to get an accurate reading. I -like my mom-found my appetite decreasing as I age.  I do exercise daily and have for many years.  Life saver for me for mental health/emotional health too.  

I agree about fad diets -did my share in the 80s!!  I know of a number of people who have had great success with Weight Watchers -as an outsider/armchair nutritionist it seems very reasonable!  I defer to you of course in what works for you-you know yourself best.

I lost about 10 pounds or so in the last 10-12 years; gave birth almost 14 years ago and when I got pregnant I was slim.  I lost the baby weight within 5 months (gained about 35 pounds).  This is one reason I attribute this to genetics.  I'm glad you now have the bio info!!

Good luck and I am impressed with your care about your health and long term health -good for you!

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9 hours ago, Jibralta said:

I do go to the gym and lift weights, and I walk about 2 miles per day, but it's not enough. You can't out-exercise a bad diet.

Great stuff. You like lifting weights? 2 miles per day is decent. So it's the diet part. No you can’t out-exercise a bad diet. I have tried over the years, even in  periods when I exercise 5 hours per day and burn 2k calories I can still consume a lot more very easily. Healthy diet is the most important factor unfortunately.

You have good genetics. Certainly if you took after your dad, you can’t blame your genetics, you don't have this excuse lol

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