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What is she thinking?


Hermy

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Hey,

 

This girl and I have been dating for about 7 - 8 months, and for the most part has been really good. The catch was, she lived with her ex-boyfriend of 3 years until about a week ago.

 

Just a bit of context, her and her ex did not end well, it wasn't civil for the most part, they still argued heaps after breaking up, which happened 2 - 3 months before we got together, even though they fell out of love way before that.

 

After he moved out, I think she took it a bit hard, and broke down one night. When I asked her she said it was nothing, and that she felt lost, although she assured me heavily she has no feelings towards her ex at all and had nothing to do with missing him.

 

When I ask her for the brutal honest truth about how she feels towards me, she says that she is scared because her feelings towards me are getting really strong and she's never really had time to be single or alone, and she really doesn't want this to end up like her and her ex.

 

I have never been in her situation before, and am just wondering can anybody shed some light about how you think she is feeling? I'm thoroughly confused at the moment. Also, what should I do?

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Pull back.... a lot. She lived with her ex until a week ago they were a couple. Make sure you are not a rebound, she's pining over the ex, he's been in the picture the whole time.

she lived with her ex-boyfriend of 3 years until about a week ago. After he moved out, I think she took it a bit hard, and broke down one night. she says that she is scared because her feelings towards me are getting really strong and she's never really had time to be single or alone, and she really doesn't want this to end up like her and her ex.
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Pull back.... a lot. She lived with her ex until a week ago they were a couple. Make sure you are not a rebound, she's pining over the ex, he's been in the picture the whole time.

 

So we're seeing each other about 2-3 times a week but more now that the ex has moved out. How much should I pull back approximately? What should I be doing?

 

Also, just clarifying they have been broken up about 10-11 months now, but still lived together until last week. Would I still count as a rebound if they've been broken up for that long?

 

Thanks again for your opinions all

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I don't think anyone, who is still living with an ex would be a in a position to begin dating again. As to what she's thinking, it's likely she's beginning the grieving process, in order to heal and move forward, (imo).

 

Do you think it's possible to grieve regarding an ex you are now over (or at least claims to be)? Do you think since they've lived together this could just be a process of change, or do you think that she still has feelings for him?

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