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So its been just over a month since we broke up, i knew the first week after we had broken up she was already messaging guys, she assured me it was "friends" but I've heard different, heard this guy really likes her etc so of course they have been speaking a lot. I'm just a bit annoyed that she lied. Whats more annoying is I've been texting this girl (past week or so) and since then my ex has been commenting on her pictures about how nice she looks etc and tweeting about her, they were in the same club the other night and my ex was taking snapchats with her etc, its like she is trying to become friends with her to stop me speaking to her? Why ? Can't she just let me live my life....she is moving on and im leaving her to it? Really annoying me.

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Bro, why are you even in contact with your ex? Re-read this post and just see what kind of stress you're putting yourself through by simply staying in touch.

 

Block her, Deleted her, Ignore her on everything.

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You're already in pain, don't self-inflict more on yourself.

 

I understand how you feel, I really do. The day after my ex left she went out drinking with all of her co-workers (who I thought she didn't like). I had to unfriend her because I couldn't take seeing the pictures... it just sent me into a bigger depression cycle.

 

Ignorance is bliss when it comes to NC & healing.

I wish you good lick in your recovery from this heartbreak.

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I haven't spoken to her, just heard through the grapevine. I dont want her back anymore, im trying to live my life, but why any girl she gets a sniff of shes trying to get involved. JUST GO AWAY

 

I understand, did mutual friends tell you about her new fling? I have a similar situation.

There are some mutual friends of ours that still have my ex as a FB friend, but luckily all of them are on my side and don't want to talk with her.... except for one. He said he plans to have her "critically think about her actions" in hopes of my ex reaching out to me to talk about our relationship, which I wished him good luck. I am going to tell him soon that if & when he talks to her, I'm going to request that he does NOT tell me anything that she says unless it is good news (she misses me, wants to talk with me, etc).

 

I would seclude myself from all avenues that are connected to her. Mutual friends, FaceBook, locations where she would usually go, etc.

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Newsflash... she is going to date other guys and maybe even kiss them and perhaps have sex with them. She is your X and she can do what she wants. The beauty part of it is that you dont have to care. Its no longer your worry. If she wants to have sex with a different guy every day and lie to you about it, she can. You have to realize that you two are not together anymore which means you dont have to decode anything she does.

 

I would high suggest that you dont talk to her. Even if you two agreed "To be friends" you are not her friend and its going to take a long time for you to be a true friend. But for now, you are not friends.

 

Not talking to her will do you worlds of good. If a friend tries to tell you what is going on in her life. Tell them to stop, you dont want to know. The less you know the better.

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Newsflash... she is going to date other guys and maybe even kiss them and perhaps have sex with them. She is your X and she can do what she wants. The beauty part of it is that you dont have to care. Its no longer your worry. If she wants to have sex with a different guy every day and lie to you about it, she can. You have to realize that you two are not together anymore which means you dont have to decode anything she does.

 

I would high suggest that you dont talk to her. Even if you two agreed "To be friends" you are not her friend and its going to take a long time for you to be a true friend. But for now, you are not friends.

 

Not talking to her will do you worlds of good. If a friend tries to tell you what is going on in her life. Tell them to stop, you dont want to know. The less you know the better.

 

I dont want to talk to her. I just don't like how she gave me abuse over something I didnt do yet she is doing it herself? Also the fact she is trying to stop me from speaking to girls by becoming friends with them. Its ridiculously immature.

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It's an ego thing. A lot of dumpers are like this; they don't want you anymore, but it still annoys them when they think you're into someone else. It's about their pride, that's all.

 

But ask yourself - are you really ready to be testing the waters with a new girl? It doesn't seem so. Not yet, anyway.

 

Unfortunately, as unfair as it feels, dumpers who had their eye on someone else will almost never tell the truth about it. They're protecting their own arses. I too found out about quite a significant betrayal a while after an ex and I had split up. But you know what? It made me realize that the man I had fallen in love with years before no longer existed, and I didn't want the new version of that man in my life in any form. Yes, it sucks being lied to. But it also highlights the fact that the relationship was not going to work. People who can't be honest with you can't be a good partner for you.

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It's an ego thing. A lot of dumpers are like this; they don't want you anymore, but it still annoys them when they think you're into someone else. It's about their pride, that's all.

 

But ask yourself - are you really ready to be testing the waters with a new girl? It doesn't seem so. Not yet, anyway.

 

Unfortunately, as unfair as it feels, dumpers who had their eye on someone else will almost never tell the truth about it. They're protecting their own arses. I too found out about quite a significant betrayal a while after an ex and I had split up. But you know what? It made me realize that the man I had fallen in love with years before no longer existed, and I didn't want the new version of that man in my life in any form. Yes, it sucks being lied to. But it also highlights the fact that the relationship was not going to work. People who can't be honest with you can't be a good partner for you.

 

You are so right.

 

I don't want anything serious, you are right, its just nice to speak to people etc.

And 100% agree, I no longer see her as the girl i fell in love with, not one little bit and I don't want to be with her at all. Its funny though as she retweets things on twitter about girls shouldn't beg someone to stay, beg for attention, beg for someone to love you....its kinda confuses me as she is the one that left me...is she just starting to regret her decision because I've walked away....seems like it

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Agree with Keyman and LonelyJedi, just don't do this to yourself. Ignore and delete and block her from social media. Did she start seeing this guy toward the end of your relationship?

I haven't spoken to her, just heard through the grapevine. I dont want her back anymore, im trying to live my life, but why any girl she gets a sniff of shes trying to get involved. JUST GO AWAY
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It's an ego thing. A lot of dumpers are like this; they don't want you anymore, but it still annoys them when they think you're into someone else. It's about their pride, that's all.

 

But ask yourself - are you really ready to be testing the waters with a new girl? It doesn't seem so. Not yet, anyway.

 

Unfortunately, as unfair as it feels, dumpers who had their eye on someone else will almost never tell the truth about it. They're protecting their own arses. I too found out about quite a significant betrayal a while after an ex and I had split up. But you know what? It made me realize that the man I had fallen in love with years before no longer existed, and I didn't want the new version of that man in my life in any form. Yes, it sucks being lied to. But it also highlights the fact that the relationship was not going to work. People who can't be honest with you can't be a good partner for you.

 

Pretty horrible seeing her post pics of their walk all over social media, she never did that when I was with her for a whole year....ugh.

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Pretty horrible seeing her post pics of their walk all over social media, she never did that when I was with her for a whole year....ugh.

 

Until you go NC you are asking for that feeling.

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Until you go NC you are asking for that feeling.

 

 

NC will help with communication, but you also need to stop seeing her completely. (block on social media, delete number, pictures, etc)

Especially when she has treated you this crappy.

 

She is doing these things to stroke her ego, which is not healthy or good. Would you want someone back who is this shallow?

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I know my ex was already talking to other people before she even let me know she was ending things. How convenient for her no? Anyways I completly stop finding out about her thru other friends. It always would just hurt and made me feel like crap x1000.

 

I for sure know she was communicating with people over text and phone. Maybe she already has someone full in her life.

 

 

I still can't believe she would go that route.

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NC will help with communication, but you also need to stop seeing her completely. (block on social media, delete number, pictures, etc)

Especially when she has treated you this crappy.

 

She is doing these things to stroke her ego, which is not healthy or good. Would you want someone back who is this shallow?

 

That's what NC is. NC means no contact. No social media stalking, no nothing.

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sounds like you are still in shock and some denial that its over. You said you dont want to talk to her but you know a lot about her movements like seeing her in person and seeing her pictures on social media. You also mentioned something to the effect that you feel wronged she lied to you about some things.

 

Let them go, it no longer matters in your life. You must the accept the here and now and that is, you are not with her, she is free and can do what she wants. If she wants to see and be with a guy romantically, then she can be. I know it hurts our esteem to see our X move on quickly. We take it hard and sometimes personally. We think its us when you havent thought that she has either emotionally and mentally moved on from the relationship and was ready or this is how she handles break ups or this is how and who she is. Before dating you was she single long? Did she start seeing you right after her previous break up? Some people cant be single.

 

So please, dont seek out info on her, dont look at pictures or social media. Let go of the relationship and the 'lies' because they just dont matter anymore. They dont. If she told you she lied will life improve? Does holding on to the lie make you feel better? Does it make you happy? Then why are you holding on to the relationship? Let it go.

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sounds like you are still in shock and some denial that its over. You said you dont want to talk to her but you know a lot about her movements like seeing her in person and seeing her pictures on social media. You also mentioned something to the effect that you feel wronged she lied to you about some things.

 

Let them go, it no longer matters in your life. You must the accept the here and now and that is, you are not with her, she is free and can do what she wants. If she wants to see and be with a guy romantically, then she can be. I know it hurts our esteem to see our X move on quickly. We take it hard and sometimes personally. We think its us when you havent thought that she has either emotionally and mentally moved on from the relationship and was ready or this is how she handles break ups or this is how and who she is. Before dating you was she single long? Did she start seeing you right after her previous break up? Some people cant be single.

 

So please, dont seek out info on her, dont look at pictures or social media. Let go of the relationship and the 'lies' because they just dont matter anymore. They dont. If she told you she lied will life improve? Does holding on to the lie make you feel better? Does it make you happy? Then why are you holding on to the relationship? Let it go.

 

Hi,

 

Appreciate your reply. Its not that I'm holding on or anything like that, I really do have no feelings for her anymore, what she has done has pushed me so far away now. Correct she is free and she can do what she wants as can i. I just have different morals. I was initally not speaking/meeting girls out of respect for her, but thats out the window now, I'm just not doing it because I don't feel really 100% ready (truthfully i cant be bothered right now) but its nothing to do with her or because i still love her. Thats well and truly gone, when someone lies to me they lose all my respect. She is blocked on absolutely everything, she tried to contact me via email to explain the situation and "assure" me it was nothing but I ignored. She knows shes been an idiot and im not wasting anymore time on her. I'll find someone alot better!!

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I know my ex was already talking to other people before she even let me know she was ending things. How convenient for her no? Anyways I completly stop finding out about her thru other friends. It always would just hurt and made me feel like crap x1000.

 

I for sure know she was communicating with people over text and phone. Maybe she already has someone full in her life.

 

 

I still can't believe she would go that route.

 

Let them get on with it!!! Grass is never greener on the other side so let them find that out. Once they realise that they'll try to come back to us (the grass) but they've pissed all over it like a dog and we'll no longer be there for them, cyaa!!! Chin up

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Let them get on with it!!! Grass is never greener on the other side so let them find that out. Once they realise that they'll try to come back to us (the grass) but they've pissed all over it like a dog and we'll no longer be there for them, cyaa!!! Chin up

 

Incorrect. Sometimes grass is greener on the other side. Many people have problems in relationships but not all of those people are willing to work through them and would rather start somewhere new without all of this baggage to carry around. It makes perfect sense and A LOT of people find themselves better off afterwards.

 

You shouldn't worry about whether or not the grass is greener because if she isn't with you it's for a reason.

 

You should worry about yourself and making sure you don't get sucked into something like this again.

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This just happened to me yesterday.... a friend told me my ex-fiance got a new BF.

 

We have been together for 6yrs, going to get married at the end of this year, lived together. She left on March 24th... hasn't even been two months.

 

Absolutely devastating. I feel like my healing has been hindered and/or reversed. I have since blocked my ex on FB.

 

Ouch.

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This just happened to me yesterday.... a friend told me my ex-fiance got a new BF.

 

We have been together for 6yrs, going to get married at the end of this year, lived together. She left on March 24th... hasn't even been two months.

 

Absolutely devastating. I feel like my healing has been hindered and/or reversed. I have since blocked my ex on FB.

 

Ouch.

 

Sorry to hear. Yep it sets you back. I've felt terrible all day yesterday and today.

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