Any success stories

[Brokenheartedm]

Anybody have success stories getting back with their ex

[Careerchoice]

You can browse the archives on here, but you will rarely, if ever, find mention of it happening when it's the girl who dumped the guy.

 

The real advice you need is make sure you stay in No Contact until you don't need to find an answer to this question. Build up your strength so you can handle things rationally.

[Annia]

I never got any ex back... and now that I think about it in most cases it was for the best. NC and trying to move on is much better and a safer bet. Besides, if you cling to your ex, beg, plead or stay there as friends holding their hand while they move on, not only you hurt yourself but it's also much worse in terms of chances of them getting back. And if the ex gets back now usually the issues that lead to the break up weren't solved and it'll happen again. If you move on and don't cling on that hope, then if by any small chances they come back, you'll be in a much better emotional position to decide if you want them back or not.

 

The only success stories I know are a few in which the exes reconnected many years later. I know one couple who were together like 15 years ago and got back together now, but meanwhile they both had other relationships and had moved on. These cases are rare though.

[Batya33]

Yes, we got back together almost 8 years later in our late 30s. We've been married 8 years now, together for almost 12.

[tallydoo]

Define success. I got back together with one, but we did it because the other was comfortable, not because it was right. We broke up and got back together several more times, leaving me in shreds. But the success was figuring out that we weren't meant to be together, and I learned how to handle breakups and exes better.

[WombatShadow]

First off, here's the masterlist:

 

@careerchoice, I've noticed while reading threads (especially the one linked above) that people keep insisting that it goes one way with genders: girls never come back; girls are the ONLY ones to come back; guys are too stubborn to come back; guys ALWAYS come crawling back. This (and experience) tells me that there's no way to know if someone will or won't come back based on data like gender, age, location, etc. Every situation is different.

[Snny]

I married my ex. We dated for several years before breaking up for 1 year to see other people and get our sh*t together in college. Got back together at a mutual friend's party. Been together for a total of 13 years and recently have a child together.

 

 

However, my situation is rare. I've dated a total of 7 people... Only went back for one after breaking up and taking some time for myself within a year. So no, I or anyone else here can promise you winning back your ex. It entirely depends on the person and situation (why the breakup happened). You got to focus on yourself first before before you can be ready for a relationship.

[Capttrae]

Me and my ex got back together after 9 1/2 years of being broken up. In that time I had changed careers, dated and lived with several other females and lived a lot. She had been married, moved slap across the country and back and lived a lot too. This time everything is falling in place just right

[mbee]

I understand you might be looking for hope - but the only thing I can tell you is to live your life and see what happens. Personally, I've never gotten back with an ex but I'm very good friends with an ex who is always there for me. We went No Contact for almost 3 years and I had no idea we'd ever even be talking again but he's a good friend.

 

I just saw my most recent ex randomly at a party. I'd be lying if I said I have 0 feelings for him, but seeing him again made me realize we are in different places and he's very immature. If the future ever intends for us to be together again, it will take at least years - he has some growing up to do but in the meantime, there's no bad blood between us and he knows he's free to reach out if he ever wants to.

 

The best thing you can do is live your life - happily, pursue your goals, meet new people and be open to anything. Be open to making new friends, falling in love again and a life that doesn't involve your ex. I know many people who are in happy relationships with their exes. Both of my brothers have broken up and are now married to their wives (who used to be their exes) so it does happen. I know many people who moved on, fell in love with someone else and are happy with the other person.

 

None of us in the forum can tell you the odds that you and your ex will get back together - but focus on you and be open to anything in life. That kind of positive attitude will attract the love you deserve.