limichelle Posted May 5, 2017 Share Posted May 5, 2017 So I had two choices the guy who was sex crazed or the guy who is autistic. Well neither were good choices, the Autistic guy became really rude and critical of my appearance. So I went on a date with a third option he seemed cool at first. We met at Starbucks and he became agressive trying to get me to go to his car. I kept saying no so he left leaving me there! He also didn't offer to pay for my drink! He just went up ordered his own and got impatient while I was ordering. So needless to say he was blocked immediately when I got home! So I was getting fed up and right when I was about to delete my account this guy messaged me. He and I have been talking for a week. We are meeting on Monday. For the first time in my dating world I have a good feeling about this date. This guy is easy to talk too, he isn't sex crazed,doesn't come off agressive, is blunt in a open honest way, and respects my space. Before dates I have cancelled before meeting the guy because I got an uneasy feeling. Or just felt nothing in particular in a good way or bad just nothing and gone on the date and the guys turn out to be duds. This time it's a good feeling so I'll take that as a good sign. Just thought I would update those who followed my last thread. Lisa Lisa Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Matt3939 Posted May 5, 2017 Share Posted May 5, 2017 Hope this one works out for you. Good luck Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ParisPaulette Posted May 5, 2017 Share Posted May 5, 2017 Hi limichelle, Sorry those last two dates were such buttheads, but good on you for maintaining your boundaries. I'm proud of you and you should be proud of you for saying no and not letting him pressure you. Never get into a stranger's car. Anyone who can't get that in this day and age, yeah probably did have bad intentions. Short answer, "If you don't want me to think you're a (fill in unsavory criminal type here) then don't fricking act like one." This is also why you do coffee dates during the day and arrange your own transportation, so when they get weird or scary or rude you can simply walk away. And they don't know where you live or have control over how you get home. But yes, keep going on dates. If this next guy seems all right and you don't get any bad vibes it's a start and a coffee date is not going to hurt anything. And keep blocking and deleting the ones who don't work out. It's online dating, it's a rough thing for both women and men sometimes. My male friends have plenty of stories too and occasionally we have a good laugh over it, or a good groan, but it is what it is. Be proud of the fact you're getting out there and you're maintaining your own boundaries. If someone is rude to you, or tries to get you to do things you aren't comfortable with or the talk is sexual out of the gate then it's okay, those men just got blocked and deleted out of your life and you move on. Go on the next date if you get a good feeling about it. Stay safe, enjoy yourself. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Wiseman2 Posted May 5, 2017 Share Posted May 5, 2017 Agree. The last three were weirdos, but as you know, unfortunately they are out there. Great you had the courage to meet and run when appropriate. Enjoy this next date! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Batya33 Posted May 6, 2017 Share Posted May 6, 2017 Enjoy the next meet! Always positive if you have positive vibes - can mean that you'll have a pleasant time having a conversation with the person and meeting the person. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
limichelle Posted May 7, 2017 Author Share Posted May 7, 2017 Well my feelings were wrong before meeting the guy he got weird real fast!! He demanded I chose between him and my family since I still live at home. He told me he loves me and will marry me in a year but we have to have sex on the first date in the coffee shop bathroom! Wth??? I blocked and now taking a much needed break. Lisa Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
boltnrun Posted May 7, 2017 Share Posted May 7, 2017 What dating site are you using? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
limichelle Posted May 7, 2017 Author Share Posted May 7, 2017 Okcupid I swear the guys seem normal at first then the creep factor takes over. I deleted that site. Lisa Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Batya33 Posted May 7, 2017 Share Posted May 7, 2017 Well my feelings were wrong before meeting the guy he got weird real fast!! He demanded I chose between him and my family since I still live at home. He told me he loves me and will marry me in a year but we have to have sex on the first date in the coffee shop bathroom! Wth??? I blocked and now taking a much needed break. Lisa Not sure why you are blaming dating sites for individuals who turn out not to be people you want to meet. That could happen anywhere when you meet new people. Maybe you just need to screen more, message/text less with strangers and don't get your expectations up -for example I thought it was strange that you commented that a stranger gives you space, etc - it was as if you met him and were dating him already. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
boltnrun Posted May 7, 2017 Share Posted May 7, 2017 I think you also said you and another guy you'd dated had decided to be in a relationship before the second date and another one (or perhaps the same one), you wanted for your "new boyfriend". Then it turned out neither one was right for you. It's called managing your expectations. Instead of viewing each date as a potential relationship or boyfriend, how about just seeing if you two have a nice time together? And don't expect the second date to be when you two confirm you're in a relationship. Slow down. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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