I did as asked , now more confused

[Armilla]

Hi, so a while ago I was constantly here trying to understand (overthink) all the possibilities of a text. And as told, I backed off as I seemed to be chasing the guy ! (Agreed) and now when I wasn't texting him , I met him on my way to class and he was extremely nice and he must have mentioned some three times to text him ! what are your thoughts ? He even asked me to let him know when am done with school.

I don't understand it. I do want to be friends with him

[Raggie]

Then ask him to do something specific at a certain time. He sounds like he is friendly toward you. Do you want just friends or do you want something more?

You need to do something assertive to put you out of your misery!!

[Lostinlove31]

Hi, so a while ago I was constantly here trying to understand (overthink) all the possibilities of a text. And as told, I backed off as I seemed to be chasing the guy ! (Agreed) and now when I wasn't texting him , I met him on my way to class and he was extremely nice and he must have mentioned some three times to text him ! what are your thoughts ? He even asked me to let him know when am done with school.

I don't understand it. I do want to be friends with him

Because he sees you and is nice doesn't mean reach out. Just because they say you can text them means you do. If you want friendship that's fine but if you want more than don't.

 

I don't know your whole story but if you were dating and broke up it is best not to be friends.

[Wiseman2]

Why don't you text with a specific reason? He hasn't been texting you. so it's probably just a way to end the conversation. "Text me". For example. Ask if he wants to go for coffee. It sounds like you have a huge crush on him.

I met him on my way to class and he was extremely nice and he must have mentioned some three times to text him ! I do want to be friends with him

[ThatwasThen]

He told you to text him instead of him texting you? Pffft.

 

If he was interested in you, he'd text you or he would have asked you out there and then. I highly recommend you DO NOT text him. Just get on with yourself and forget him.

[nsolo]

I second what ThatwasThen said above. You can do better. WAY better.

[ParisPaulette]

So he saw you, but why is it still "you have to contact me" and not the other way around? There's something off there. Someone who wants to spend time with you will reach out to spend time with you. They won't make you do all the work, and I still see him doing exactly what he was doing before.

 

Tell him, "You know what? You make an effort to contact me and then we might just get somewhere. Until then, I have other things to do, buh-bye." OR just go do other things with other people and block and delete him already. Air kisses and a "We must do something soon," with no intention of doing anything ever is all the time you should be giving someone who only says you should pursue him AFTER he's seen you in public. Sort of one of those, "Oh yeah, I almost forgot about her... Meh, let her make some effort, it might be a slow week for me and if it isn't I can just ignore her."

 

He's lazy at best or you're one in a string of girls and he gets a kick out of making women chase him. But seeing you in public and telling you to contact him after all that time of him not even bothering to contact you? Yeah, nothing has changed. You're still the only one making any effort. And he's open about that too. The nerve.

[Armilla]

Okay. Thanks all. Just another thing. Do u think he is shy ? I always got that impression of him. Also he asked me if I was available weekend and I wasn't so then he asked me to let him know. And I never met him in a dating scenario. So there's that.

[Sportster2005]

Hi, so a while ago I was constantly here trying to understand (overthink) all the possibilities of a text. And as told, I backed off as I seemed to be chasing the guy ! (Agreed) and now when I wasn't texting him , I met him on my way to class and he was extremely nice and he must have mentioned some three times to text him ! what are your thoughts ? He even asked me to let him know when am done with school.

I don't understand it. I do want to be friends with him

 

If your goal is friendship, tell him you want to be friends.

[James516]

So do you do this with female friends such as "Hey Susie! Oh yeah, weekend is busy. Yours? Text you, you say? Okay." Then re-examine what just happened over and over - OMG, Susie said text. What could that mean, let me analyze this for days.

 

No, you don't do that. You've probably forgottten about Susie by the time you've walked down the hall. In other words, stop the bs with yourself. You're interested in this guy and it isn't as friends. There are a lot of people who try to loophole pretending to be friends as a low risk attempt for something more to develop. That just leads to false hopes, a lot of confusion for both, and plenty of wasted energy. If you want to see this guy, then do as others have advised - suggest certain plans. Then wait. If he doesn't follow up with a concrete idea, then he isn't worth pursing or thinking about any more, even as a friend.

[ThatwasThen]

Okay. Thanks all. Just another thing. Do u think he is shy ? I always got that impression of him. Also he asked me if I was available weekend ]and I wasn't so then he asked me to let him know. And I never met him in a dating scenario. So there's that.

 

I'm confused as to why you didn't mention he actually asked you out and you declined due to being busy. If you're so interested in him then why oh why didn't you offer him another time instead of leaving it at "I'm busy" and then him, rightfully so, telling you to text him. Your late addition changes EVERYTHING.

 

If you want to get with him in some form of either friendship or romantic interest then for goodness sakes, text him if he told you to three times to do just that AND ask him to meet you but DO NOT text him until you are actually available to meet up with him.

 

Is he Shy you ask? NO... you sound like the shy one.

[Armilla]

I'm confused as to why you didn't mention he actually asked you out and you declined due to being busy. If you're so interested in him then why oh why didn't you offer him another time instead of leaving it at "I'm busy" and then him, rightfully so, telling you to text him. Your late addition changes EVERYTHING.

 

If you want to get with him in some form of either friendship or romantic interest then for goodness sakes, text him if he told you to three times to do just that AND ask him to meet you but DO NOT text him until you are actually available to meet up with him.

 

Is he Shy you ask? NO... you sound like the shy one.

I may be 😳 But he never initiated texts except for one time that I invited him to do something in group.

[ThatwasThen]

I may be 😳 But he never initiated texts except for one time that I invited him to do something in group.

WHY are you so concerned about texts? They are words on a screen that mean NOTHING without actions to back them up as the truth.

 

He asked you out, you said you couldn't as you were busy and you didn't suggest another day/time. He's put the ball in your court now (rightly so) so either ask him out and if he refuses then forget him for good. If he says yes, well there you go, you're now on your way to whatever happens, happens. Don't go to bed with him until he shows you in action with matching words that he wants to be exclusive with you. (if he says yes).

[Armilla]

WHY are you so concerned about texts? They are words on a screen that mean NOTHING without actions to back them up as the truth.

 

He asked you out, you said you couldn't as you were busy and you didn't suggest another day/time. He's put the ball in your court now (rightly so) so either ask him out and if he refuses then forget him for good. If he says yes, well there you go, you're now on your way to whatever happens, happens. Don't go to bed with him until he shows you in action with matching words that he wants to be exclusive with you. (if he says yes).

Thanks. That should be helpful.