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Is it time to leave?

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I'll try to make it brief.


I live with my older brother, I rent the bottom half of the house. He recently got married and had a kid, so naturally, I know I need to move out. Which is fine, it's time for me to do so. He has mentioned how I should consider getting a new car before I move out, while my cost of living is lower where I am at. The car I have now isn't brand new, she's got a few miles on her but I do keep up on routine maintenance. I could probably get another thirty to forty thousand out of it.


But, here's where things got weird...


My brother suggest getting the car while with him...(side note: I havent made any major purchases ever...no new car, no property, nothing. I have a credit card that I always pay on time.) I tell him, I'd rather focus on moving out and getting settled, not take on another big expense and then move...this is where he mentions the cost of living with him (It'll probably take a few years to pay off this car, so I'm going to have to pay a decent amount of money at some point-sooner than later.) I'm usually a push over for my family, and I say "I'll look into it..."


Now, my gut tells me something is up...


I've never come across anyone who wants another to buy a car and isn't the one trying to sell the car. I thought about it cause it felt off. The only thing that makes sense, and maybe I'm overthinking it, but with him having his kid (and his wife bringing in two from a previous relationship he has taken in as his own)...do you think he may be trying to persuade me into making a major purchase to extend my stay here aka get a few more months of rent out of me? Cause if I get something like that, why would I want to move out right away and take on more of a financial burden? I don't know, he's my brother, and I never question family, but the fact that he and even my mother seen how uncomfortable I am with this whole thing, and they're saying to just do it.


Am I being a little ridiculous? Or is there something going on here....? Any insight would be appreciated. Thank you.

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I think you are on the right track by holding off on buying a car. You are right, it's added expense which you don't need at the moment.


I know my older brother always wants what's best for me and he would probably say the same thing. I think you are over thinking it. I think it's just he wants you to have a better car when you move. As in, when you move you will no longer be living with him. He can't watch over you anymore so if your car breaks down or something, you will be left stranded. He's just overly protective of you, wants to make sure you have a good car that doesn't break down... etc. I think he only means well and there are no hidden agendas.


Best bet is to talk to him. See where he's coming from.

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Yes. Forget the car and save up to move out. He can get a new tenant. Cars are not an investment and create debt. Keep yours as long as it's maintained and running and save for a new place instead.

.do you think he may be trying to persuade me into making a major purchase to extend my stay here aka get a few more months of rent out of me?
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If I am reading this correctly...


Is there a particular car he is pushing you to buy? A luxury or sports car ?


Because with him being married and having a kid... he's not going to be dreamcar shopping for a long time. He is going to be owning practical family vehicles. And if he wants to buy a car WITH you (a single man), this gives him the opportunity to own a dream car.


Nope. You want to have FULL ownership of the car. Don't buy it with him. Move out.

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It sounds as though brother has your practical best interests at heart, as does your Mom. It sounds as though he isn't in a rush for you to move out, and he foresees the potential for your current car to become a safety hazard or a money pit. This doesn't mean you'd need to buy a car immediately and then move out with a hefty debt, but rather, you can spare yourself the expense of an immediate move and the upkeep of a full price household in order to sock away money while you're still living on a discount.


Then you can track your car expenses, and if you find yourself putting more into it, say, over the next 2 quarters than you would have paid toward monthly car payments--or even if you break even, then you can put your additional savings toward a safer, maintenance free car.


I doubt that brother is trying to sabotage your future plans, but rather, he's well aware of full household costs, and driving a money pit at the risk of your own safety on top of the compound expense of running full household rings senseless.


If you've got a break on expenses at the moment, why trade those in for a compound expense situation if you don't need to? Save your money, trust that brother isn't in a rush for you to leave, and when the situation calls for a new car, you'll have more money to put down on one rather than sinking it into unnecessary rent.

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Thanks for the responses. Another issue that freezes me at the moment is my job is in a vulnerable state at the moment, the union I'm apart of are in a position to strike if they see fit. I'm not one to just assume everything will be okay, if I feel things can come down, then I know it's time to find something that is more certain. I went over this with my brother and mother, and explained to them, I don't want to take that risk...I don't want to assume everything will be okay, I want to do my best to KNOW before I make a move that could end in disaster. They seem to have understood. And thank you for the insight, my family and I are pretty tight, and I just couldnt understand why it seemed to be a big deal on getting a car, but maybe it's because they know more about living expenses than I. Thanks again.

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