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posting to vent and stay no contact


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I started dating a guy about 2 years ago. Long story short, I felt pressured to date him and wasn't sure what I wanted so I was with other people while he still considered us "together" although I told him how I felt. So, miscommunication and it being my first serious relationship made it feel like I was cheating, which I do regret. He also never took me in public, so I was looking for a guy that wasn't embarrassed of me, and he flirted with basically every girl he knew, although he says he never slept with him. Anyway, about 6 months in we broke it off but still kept in contact/ sleeping together etc. Fast forward, last summer he finally slept with someone new but still wanted to sleep with me. He told me after I wouldn't have sex with him that he would call her up.

Then, after this Christmas break, he has also slept with multiple people but still told me he wanted me. I made it clear to him I did not want to have casual sex, I did not want to be his friend with benefits, I did not want to be a replacement for all these girls he had been sleeping with. He took me to the movies, said he wanted something "real." I told him I did not want to do this if he didn't care about me, etc. I guess I should have been more explicit about this, because after he told me he still cared about me, wanted me, and it was more than just that, I Stupidly slept with him. It was after sleeping with him I found out about all his other girls. Then, after this, he proceeds to tell me he doesn't want a relationship with me, he never would he just wanted to have sex with me. I guess it is my fault for not being clear enough, but I thought I had been. Anyway, last night he called me a , said he had never lied to me about anything, because I asked him why he lied about it being more than friends with benefits when he had no intention of every ending up with me. I said something hurtful, but did not think much of it because I told him not to call me a and he continued to do it. So, he blocked me. However, for about the past year and a half he will block me, then somehow we will start talking again. This time, I am DONE. I blocked him, but I am so, so weak when it comes to him. So, I figure if I post here maybe it will hold me accountable for never contacting him again. HE has hurt me so much, and I have basically spent my last 3 years of college upset over him. I have a lot going for me in life, and I know I am worth so much more than that. I think a hard part is blaming this whole thing on myself, as he has told me multiple times everything is my fault. But I am done with this, and am starting no contact.

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Your are in a great time of your life to get to know people. If you stay on this guys hook it will cripple any real relationship you might attempt. The longer you are with him in such a way, the more and more your viewpoint in what a healthy relationship should be will become skewed. It is so toxic and I see so many ppl fall into this trap. Stay strong.

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Unfortunately it sounds like it never went past fwb/casual and was never exclusive dating.

 

If that's not what you want cut him of completely and get on some dating apps and start dating guys who want exclusive dating and relationships.

6 months in we broke it off but still kept in contact/ sleeping together etc. he finally slept with someone new but still wanted to sleep with me. he proceeds to tell me he doesn't want a relationship with me, he never would he just wanted to have sex with me.
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