Asla Posted April 22, 2017 Share Posted April 22, 2017 Hi there, I'm looking for people who experienced the same thing. I'm feeling really lost and it looks like it's getting worse with every day.. So I dated this guy for almost three years. Best years of my life, he was my best friend and we had a lot of things in common. We also did a lot of things together which I loved: Going to the movies, parties, nature, vacation, some random place.. We broke up one year ago, because we did have a lot of fights (we also lived together for two years). He cheated on me in the end, which really broke my heart. After this I was feeling happy to have him out of my life, and I started to do other nice things. Since 6 months or so everything is going downhill. I'm tired every day. I don't want to go out anymore. I don't see much people anymore and even if I try to do something, it just doesn't excite me anymore. Don't get me wrong, I TRY to meet new people and do nice things, but I'm just so tired and I totally changed. I've become very insecure about myself, not seeing why anyone would want to be with me anymore. I got people leaving me, because I'm not the spontaneous happy little girl anymore. I really want to be happy again, doing a lot of things and going out, but things changed so much and I can't put on a mask and try to be happy. Most of the times I end up feeling awkward, being silent, observing everyone and concluding from there that everyone is so much more fun then me. It used to be so easily for me to make friends, having parties every week.. And now people just don't care anymore. I've become boring, while knowing this, and it's so frustrating. And I miss him. I finally saw him again two months ago. Him, having parties every day of the week (really), meeting SO many people and enjoying his life. He asked me to have a drink since there were some stuff I needed to pick up. Everything just felt so right, like before. We had so much fun and laughed a lot (nothing happened for the rest). He asked me to come over again soon, to have a beer together. yesterday he asked me again. I told him I couldn't come. Being afraid to really fall in love again. Being afraid to be used. Being afraid something might happen and he would hurt me again. Thinking about him seeing other girls (he's handsome, so most definitely). Falling in love with other girls. Forgetting me. And the only thing I really want is for us to work out again. I always feel how he still cares about me. How he's still interested in me. I'm just so scared to be let down again. In the beginning I was so full of life, and full with hope. Now I just feel numb everyday. Always having the feeling that I'm not good enough, that people don't like me, that I'm not pretty and on the other hand also not interested in any other guy. I did date some, but it was obviously all about sex, and I turned them down when I found out. Is there someone who had a similair experience and got out of this, starting to do a lot of things again and enjoying life again? I try but find it so hard. I changed so much compared to last year.. Feeling so down and useless.. I hope to hear a story of people getting out of this again. Thank you. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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