Sb17 Posted April 17, 2017 Share Posted April 17, 2017 I got chlamydia when I was a teenager. I have been worried for a long time (ever since I found out I had it) that I can't get pregnant and I'm not sure if I had PID from it (I had some abdominal cramping and spotting when I decided to go to the doctor). my gyn told me I have a 10-12% chance of having infertility issue.This was 10 years ago when I was young and dumb and trusted my boyfriend at the time that he was clean and not cheating on me, I'm thinking I had it for about 4 months. My fiancé and I want children and are going to start trying to get pregnant a little while after the wedding but I have never told him about having chlamydia in the past. I feel dirty and ashamed and I got it from only the 2nd guy I had ever slept with and have always been worried that if I tell him he will leave me or see me differently or not want to do anything sexual with me anymore. I'm wondering if it's even really important for him to know or if I should not tell him unless I have to like if I have trouble getting pregnant? any advice? I have been worried about this for a long time. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Seraphim Posted April 17, 2017 Share Posted April 17, 2017 I don't think you need to go into it now. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
catfeeder Posted April 17, 2017 Share Posted April 17, 2017 You're psyching yourself out with all the connotations you associate with catching something sexually. Consider it as common as getting mono as a teenager if you believe that a 10 to 12 percent chance of impact is any greater than the infertility risks faced by any other couple. If you can't talk about this with fiance, how strong is your relationship? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Wiseman2 Posted April 17, 2017 Share Posted April 17, 2017 This is a conversation to have with your doctor and a referral to a therapist to address 'feeling dirty'.. You were treated, right? Why dredge up drama? I got chlamydia when I was a teenager. This was 10 years ago. I feel dirty and ashamed Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Sb17 Posted April 17, 2017 Author Share Posted April 17, 2017 This is a conversation to have with your doctor and a referral to a therapist to address 'feeling dirty'.. You were treated, right? Why dredge up drama? Yes I was treated as soon as I found out and took a one time dose of antibiotics. I don't know I just feel like I'm deceiving him since he doesn't know this about me. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Sb17 Posted April 17, 2017 Author Share Posted April 17, 2017 You're psyching yourself out with all the connotations you associate with catching something sexually. Consider it as common as getting mono as a teenager if you believe that a 10 to 12 percent chance of impact is any greater than the infertility risks faced by any other couple. If you can't talk about this with fiance, how strong is your relationship? I don't know I haven't wanted to talk to anyone really about it except for my best friend. I just feel he will see me differently and might think I deceived him since I haven't told him and we've been together for several years. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mustlovedogs Posted April 17, 2017 Share Posted April 17, 2017 A 10% chance of having fertility issues is not very high. Poor diet could impact that percent way more. I wouldn't worry about him. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Sb17 Posted April 17, 2017 Author Share Posted April 17, 2017 A 10% chance of having fertility issues is not very high. Poor diet could impact that percent way more. I wouldn't worry about him. So I shouldn't tell him unless I have problems when we try to get pregnant? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mustlovedogs Posted April 17, 2017 Share Posted April 17, 2017 So I shouldn't tell him unless I have problems when we try to get pregnant? I wouldn't even tell him then. I don't know. What good would come of it? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Sb17 Posted April 17, 2017 Author Share Posted April 17, 2017 I wouldn't even tell him then. I don't know. What good would come of it? I'm just wondering how I would explain to him why I was having problems getting pregnant especially if he went to the doctor appointments with me. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Seraphim Posted April 17, 2017 Share Posted April 17, 2017 I'm just wondering how I would explain to him why I was having problems getting pregnant especially if he went to the doctor appointments with me. MANY MANY women have problems with fertility and it has nothing to do with STD's. You might have no issues at all. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mustlovedogs Posted April 17, 2017 Share Posted April 17, 2017 I'm just wondering how I would explain to him why I was having problems getting pregnant especially if he went to the doctor appointments with me. Don't worry about it yet. But for context: I have a friend who was a professional cheerleader, does cross fit, eats super healthy, is a vegetarian, etc - they had intense problems having a kid. It can happen to anyone. Literally. Don't stress before it happens. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Sb17 Posted April 17, 2017 Author Share Posted April 17, 2017 MANY MANY women have problems with fertility and it has nothing to do with STD's. You might have no issues at all. That's true Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Wiseman2 Posted April 17, 2017 Share Posted April 17, 2017 Even if you do there's still no direct proof. However TMI can be damaging when used without discretion and when you have psychological issues such as "feeling dirty". So I shouldn't tell him unless I have problems when we try to get pregnant? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
chitown9 Posted April 18, 2017 Share Posted April 18, 2017 I would not worry about it. You have been treated and now have a clean bill of health. You are letting your imagination take over. You never need to tell him about something that occurred in the past unless it affects your future with him together, and there is nothing that meets that criteria. In essence, you are making a big dado about nothing. Lighten up! chi Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Sb17 Posted April 18, 2017 Author Share Posted April 18, 2017 I would not worry about it. You have been treated and now have a clean bill of health. You are letting your imagination take over. You never need to tell him about something that occurred in the past unless it affects your future with him together, and there is nothing that meets that criteria. In essence, you are making a big dado about nothing. Lighten up! chi Yeah but it will affect our future if I have fertility issues and it's from that like my tubes being blocked or something..but I guess I'll cross that bridge if I get to it. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
catfeeder Posted April 18, 2017 Share Posted April 18, 2017 Yeah but it will affect our future if I have fertility issues and it's from that like my tubes being blocked or something..but I guess I'll cross that bridge if I get to it. If you have fertility issues, you won't know whether it's even from that. Other things impact fertility, and it's always a crap shoot. So it makes no sense to wind yourself up about a 10% chance of impact, when a common fibroid, cyst, fallopian abnormality or any number of things may or may not interfere with your ability to conceive--including a low sperm count or something else on his part that remains an unknown. You can psyche yourself up about this--or not. It's not against the law, but it sure won't help you or make you easy to be around. There are far, far larger challenges you'll face as a couple, so inventing reasons to come unglued now only works against your ability to mature into resilience and focus instead on being a loving and generous partner. Raising superfluous 'stuff' doesn't contribute to that in any way, shape or form--but if you disagree, that's your right, in which case, lay it on him and let him respond as he sees fit. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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