If you're in my shoes would you worry about this? Should I wait for her to text?

[fmfan08]

Just a little confused and want some perspective as I've been out the dating game for a while, had the odd date or two in the last month, etc.

 

This girl started talking to me on POF and we bantered back and forth, I got her number at the end then I text her the next day continuing that banter to then ask her out.

 

We originally had our first date planned for last Thursday but she asked if she could re-arrange it for Saturday due to driving family to airport, so we did.

 

Our first date was a little nerve wracking, but we played mini-golf, went for dinner then hit the arcades and a bar.

 

She showed me all the positive signs, touching her hair, playfully hitting my arm, teasing me, etc and I reciprocated the physical contact. At the end of our date as I walked her to her car, we kissed for a good 20-30 seconds and she seemed to enjoy it. I pulled away to say goodbye and she went back in to peck me on the lips then playfully slapped me.

 

When she got back home she text me saying she had a really good night and I said the same.

 

The next day she initiated saying "Evening [my nickname] how are you?". So we bantered and I aimed to ask her out for the second date. She said she thinks she's free Friday and Saturday but won't know for certain until Wednesday, but so far she is. I agreed and ended the conversation.

 

Now, from Monday-Thursday this week she was on holiday within the country with friends at a cottage so I expected any contact with her would be delayed.

 

I reached out and made a joke, hoping she was enjoying her holiday. She replied three hours later (usually 10-15 mins she replies), however during those three hours she was uploading pictures of her holiday onto Facebook and sharing stuff. She told me she was enjoying it and had fun at the seaside and she asked how my day off was.

 

I replied three hours later as I was at work. This is a picture of the conversation following:

 

[ATTACH=CONFIG]11335[/ATTACH]

 

- Should I be worried that she didn't respond to my last message when all the other times I've ended a conversation, she's replied to them?

- It will be two days since we last spoke to each other, should I wait it out and let her reach out to me? She's initiated a lot and I did the last time

- Would going three days without speaking be too much? I'd like her to wonder where I've gone, create mystery, etc.

- If you were in my situation, would you think things were going good and nothing to worry about?

 

I'm just curious, because I'm still getting emoji's/emoticons, her asking questions and she offered me days when she's free but I've noticed she's not reached out to me much this week and I've been having to do that. Obviously she's been on holiday within the country, so that's probably a factor and I've tried not to message her too much and respected that. I am on dating websites talking to other girls, but I would like to continue seeing this one.

[abitbroken]

If she is away - then she should enjoy her trip, be present for the people she is with and if she wants to share pictures of her trip on social media, she is entitled too. Since you only went out once, it would be a red flag if she was focused on you instead of those she was on the trip with. I wouldn't be worried. If she is doing the "family thing" - does that mean this weekend because its Easter and she celebrates it? I would let it go and just contact her over the weekend to ask her out on Tuesday or Wednesday. Maybe Wednesday so she has some breathing room with Tuesday as the backup date if you have to counteroffer. I would NOT stop communicating just to be "the mysterious one". Rather, I'd communicate to set up another date. if she told you she's free Tuesday, i would have already counteroffered her and planned something

[Wiseman2]

It's going very well. Lay back on the texting somewhat and try to think of a next fun date and nail down a time she can go when she gets back. Dating is going on in person dates not deciphering emojis. first date was a little nerve wracking, but we played mini-golf, went for dinner then hit the arcades and a bar.The next day she initiated saying "Evening [my nickname] how are you?". So we bantered and I aimed to ask her out for the

[fmfan08]

If she is away - then she should enjoy her trip, be present for the people she is with and if she wants to share pictures of her trip on social media, she is entitled too. Since you only went out once, it would be a red flag if she was focused on you instead of those she was on the trip with. I wouldn't be worried. If she is doing the "family thing" - does that mean this weekend because its Easter and she celebrates it? I would let it go and just contact her over the weekend to ask her out on Tuesday or Wednesday. Maybe Wednesday so she has some breathing room with Tuesday as the backup date if you have to counteroffer. I would NOT stop communicating just to be "the mysterious one". Rather, I'd communicate to set up another date. if she told you she's free Tuesday, i would have already counteroffered her and planned something

 

I fully understand that, it's only been one date and she's spent that holiday time with friends. She'll want to come back and spend it with family over Easter, that makes sense.

 

If you click the picture of the conversation, I tell her 5pm on Wednesday and to meet in the city centre and she says "Yeah I think that's okay I have plans already on Tuesday already.

 

So being that we last spoke Wednesday morning, do you think I should shoot her a text Friday morning wishing her well/include a tease, joke etc? I was thinking Saturday morning, but three days might be a stretch.

[fmfan08]

It's going very well. Lay back on the texting somewhat and try to think of a next fun date and nail down a time she can go when she gets back. Dating is going on in person dates not deciphering emojis.

 

Does the picture of the conversation appear for you? If not here it is

 

She seems to agree to it. I just don't want to converse too much over text incase I say something wrong, but then I don't want to go no contact until Wednesday obviously. Should I send a text in the morning (2 days) or wait until Saturday? (3 days). Don't want her thinking I've lost interest.

[Wiseman2]

Just wish her a happy Easter Fri or Sat and don't try to be too funny over texts. Save it for the dates.

So being that we last spoke Wednesday morning, do you think I should shoot her a text Friday morning wishing her well/include a tease, joke etc? I was thinking Saturday morning, but three days might be a stretch.

[mustlovedogs]

you are entirely overthinking this. She's having fun, she's into you, don't text her to death.

[fmfan08]

you are entirely overthinking this. She's having fun, she's into you, don't text her to death.

 

Okay got you. We briefly texted on Tuesday and Wednesday morning and it will be Friday morning shortly. I've given a couple of days to pull back, is it worth waiting another day? Just wondering if three is a long time. I'd just be wishing her well, rather than have too much conversation.

[abitbroken]

Does the picture of the conversation appear for you? If not here it is

 

She seems to agree to it. I just don't want to converse too much over text incase I say something wrong, but then I don't want to go no contact until Wednesday obviously. Should I send a text in the morning (2 days) or wait until Saturday? (3 days). Don't want her thinking I've lost interest.

 

Do what you feel like. Don't overthink. If she said she is spending the whole weekend with her family, text her friday hinting that you'll firm up plans tuesday or just text her and say you'd like to try this new place on Wednesday and is she game for that after the family visit (if she celebrates Easter - nothing interest losing or nefarious there). If she says yes, then say great and we'll firm up a time then. Or text saturday = whatever feels right to you. Or how about being old fashioned and call?

[fmfan08]

Do what you feel like. Don't overthink. If she said she is spending the whole weekend with her family, text her friday hinting that you'll firm up plans tuesday or just text her and say you'd like to try this new place on Wednesday and is she game for that after the family visit (if she celebrates Easter - nothing interest losing or nefarious there). If she says yes, then say great and we'll firm up a time then. Or text saturday = whatever feels right to you. Or how about being old fashioned and call?

 

Yeah she knows we're going bowling and for drinks on Wednesday, I'd just be checking in on her on Friday wishing her a good day. On Sunday I'll wish her happy easter and that I'm looking forward to getting beaten by her at bowling this wednesday.

[LonelyJedi]

Everything seems to be going well for you... be glad she is giving you an alternative date/time.

The girl I'm trying to see won't even give me that!

But perhaps I need to move on...

 

 

I agree with the other members, don't try to analyze her emojis & lack of responses.

Until you make her your girlfriend, she is not obligated to text you every waking moment.

[fmfan08]

Everything seems to be going well for you... be glad she is giving you an alternative date/time.

The girl I'm trying to see won't even give me that!

But perhaps I need to move on...

 

 

I agree with the other members, don't try to analyze her emojis & lack of responses.

Until you make her your girlfriend, she is not obligated to text you every waking moment.

 

That's very true. If she re-arranges on Wednesday for another day I'll move on and talk to other girls. I usually give up if I don't get offered an alternate time, but she seems to be doing.

 

I'll just check in with her tomorrow.

[Jibralta]

- Should I be worried that she didn't respond to my last message when all the other times I've ended a conversation, she's replied to them?

- It will be two days since we last spoke to each other, should I wait it out and let her reach out to me? She's initiated a lot and I did the last time

- Would going three days without speaking be too much? I'd like her to wonder where I've gone, create mystery, etc.

- If you were in my situation, would you think things were going good and nothing to worry about?

 

Whoa there. Wow. You're over-analyzing. And you're getting a little weird (see bold^)--don't try to manipulate people. You'll just end up outsmarting yourself.

 

It sounds like things are going fine as they are. Try to stop thinking and scheming so much and let things flow naturally.

 

Also, this (bold) means absolutely nothing:

 

She showed me all the positive signs, touching her hair,

 

If the touching of hair meant something, I'd be crushing on my computer monitor, the window, the paper on my desk, my keyboard, people I passed in the hall, air....

 

However, these are good signs:

 

playfully hitting my arm, teasing me, etc and I reciprocated the physical contact. At the end of our date as I walked her to her car, we kissed for a good 20-30 seconds and she seemed to enjoy it. I pulled away to say goodbye and she went back in to peck me on the lips then playfully slapped me.

[Hollyj]

You need to chill out! You are getting yourself all worked up over this.

[abitbroken]

She showed me all the positive signs, touching her hair,

 

I touch my hair when i am nervous, when i think it is tangled or has something in it. I don't touch my hair to flirt. So i agree, doing get ahead of yourself. Some people even just have a habit of touching their hair like some people click a pen or bite their fingernails. You really don't know what that means.

[mustlovedogs]

Be yourself. If she doesn't like you as yourself, you shouldn't be together.

[Wiseman2]

Those 'hair twirling', '3 day rule', PUA "signs", and tricks will ruin your chances every time. Stop going by that. Use common sense. It's going well she wants to date.

[fmfan08]

Those 'hair twirling', '3 day rule', PUA "signs", and tricks will ruin your chances every time. Stop going by that. Use common sense. It's going well she wants to date.

 

I never go by the 3 day rule, I wait a day. Hair twirling I guess because it's a nervous trait then I put two and two together, but luckily there's more signs from her and not just that one.

 

The texting went really good today, really positive so guess it was because of being busy on holiday. She replied to my goodbye earlier on then text me again just before. Her second text was near midnight so I'm about to go to sleep and I'll reply back in the morning.

[phoebeava]

I think you are over thinking. Relax, take your time. Perhaps she delayed responding to you because she doesn't want to come across too keen.

[jrno1]

If she is away - then she should enjoy her trip, be present for the people she is with and if she wants to share pictures of her trip on social media, she is entitled too. Since you only went out once, it would be a red flag if she was focused on you instead of those she was on the trip with. I wouldn't be worried. If she is doing the "family thing" - does that mean this weekend because its Easter and she celebrates it? I would let it go and just contact her over the weekend to ask her out on Tuesday or Wednesday. Maybe Wednesday so she has some breathing room with Tuesday as the backup date if you have to counteroffer. I would NOT stop communicating just to be "the mysterious one". Rather, I'd communicate to set up another date. if she told you she's free Tuesday, i would have already counteroffered her and planned something

 

 

[ManyDates]

Normal hair touching doesn't mean much, but when she does the full hair flip from one side to the other, then holds her head on an angle with a devilish smile it indeed does

[boltnrun]

I touch my hair all the time. It's always a tangled mess no matter what I try to do to it. If it's taken as a sign of romantic interest I am in big trouble!

 

Don't watch You Tube videos or read online articles about getting a girl (if indeed you have) and just go with what is happening. Things seem like they're going pretty good, right?

[abitbroken]

That's very true. If she re-arranges on Wednesday for another day I'll move on and talk to other girls. I usually give up if I don't get offered an alternate time, but she seems to be doing.

 

I'll just check in with her tomorrow.

 

I wouldn't move on if she is not available Wednesday but offers Thursday or Friday, for example. I am beat after spending the holiday with my family. I need a few days to regroup and you are busy anyways on Tuesday, right? As long as she counteroffers, I would just roll with it. Sometimes a weekend date when someone doesn't have to get up early the next morning is best sometimes for second or third dates anyways.

[Cleardecisions]

Way way way overthinking. Play it cool. If you are overthinking now you will only drive yourself crazy and come off insecure when you're around or her via text. There will undoubtedly be times where responses are delayed or what have you. As long as she is keeping it moving forward (which she definitely is by suggesting alternate times to meet up when what you suggested didn't work for her) then you have ABSOLUTELY NOTHING TO WORRY ABOUT. there are some great dating advice threads around here. Push pull theory is a decent read. Stay very aloof. And don't make every text a joke. Be genuine. She will see that and appreciate it more than trying to siphon a laugh or cutesy response out of her (you can still keep those in the mix of course!)

 

Just enjoy it man. Don't overthink it and it will work out like its supposed to. There is a big difference between being measured and overthinking!