Guy in Australia

[Yimura]

Hi there

I'm here to get some advise so I would be happy about any answers! Thanks in advance!

Last year I was on exchange in Australia for two months and there I met this guy. He was really popular at his school and known for always flirting with several girls and not meaning it serious. (Actually quite a lot of the people I met there hated him for it.) When he met me though he introduced me to all his friends and even his family right away. He took me on dates but we never really were in a relationship. Everyone thought we were but it just never happened. I knew that he was partying a lot and that he had heaps of girls that thought he was serious about them and that he had something going on with but while I was there I never saw him with any girl. I didn't want to be one of his girls so was really careful about everything I did but he really gave me heaps of his time, helped me with my language problems and all of his friends tried to get to know me as well.

About 7 months ago I left Australia and I thought we'd lose contact really quick because we never were in a relationship anyway. But we've been texting and flirting ever since then. Everyone in Australia tells me he completely changed, didn't date anyone since I left and that he keeps talking about me. His friends started teasing him a bit because of that. I got really close to one of his best friends and she said that he got really ironic when a girl he slept with before tried to get back at him. All of this sounds alright but I just don't think a person can change that much. He's not the kind of a person for that.

Now I finished school and will go back to Australia for a year. But during the last two months he often didn't reply for several days. He never did that before. Whenever he does reply though, he is really really cute and even asked me out for his school ball that is when I'm back (and still ages away!). He said his aunt ( where he is spending christmas) asked if I wanted to join the family Christmas next year because I can't be with my family this year. Its so nice and he obviously still talks to his family about me.

But I feel like I can't be too important to him if he takes ages to reply! What can I do? I don't want to have wrong expectations and I fear he is just back to where he was before I knew him. When I asked him about the late answers he said he had a whole lot of sports stuff going on and I know he is really busy but before he always managed to talk to me anyway. I don't want to be clingy but I also don't want to be one of the girls who just thought he cared. I'm probably sounding stupid but with all his girl stories I don't want to realise that he doesn't care too late and look stupid afterwards.

I hope I didn't sound too stupid! Thanks for advise...

[Wiseman2]

Try not to confuse a friend and some flirting with a LDR. Wait until you get back there to feel things out. Why does he have to reply asap?

 

He should go back to how he was. Enjoying his life there staying busy with school and friends and activities. Not being text-tethered in an unhealthy fashion. Lay back and wait for him to reach out if he wants to.

 

You as well should focus on your local life school and friends. Stay in touch via social media but why pretend it's a relationship and get this possessive?

Now I finished school and will go back to Australia for a year. When I asked him about the late answers he said he had a whole lot of sports stuff going on and I know he is really busy

[Yimura]

You're probably right, it's no relationship... it just feels as if he is constantly flirting with me and it's so confusing especially because I like him way too much. Also he's always the one planning long-term stuff and hinting that he likes me a lot... what also could just be his way of talking to girls. I don't know, I'm just confused