Boyfriend Moving

[AprilHuffey]

My boyfriend and I are sophomores in high school. It makes sense if the first assumption is "they're young and indenial" but anyway, this is the scenario. We have been dating for 2 years now. His step dad died in a motercycle accident last summer and they can't afford to live here anymore. They have to move across country by the end of this next summer and I'm so completely heart-broken... I've shed countless tears and don't even know what to think. He's been the most important role in my life the past 2 years and I don't know how to deal with this. We both want to do long distance but I fear it won't work and I feel completely depressed and I could take advice and/or some words to cheer me up. Thank you so much.

[TheRawTruth]

Long distance can work, ONLY if BOTH PARTIES are completely committed to MAKING it work. If one of you can't deal with not seeing each other (in person) regularly, or you meet somebody else and that person catches your eye, it can cause you guys to start arguing about nonsense just because there are other options available.

 

Now, MY question is, why across COUNTRY? How can they afford THAT, but not another place in YOUR town? (Or are they moving in with family?) Could he move in with YOU? (Not a good idea, I'm just thinking of ways you could stay together.)

 

Bottom line: If the long distance thing DOESN'T work out, it wasn't meant to be. If it's meant to last, long distance can't beat you guys. Good luck!

[AprilHuffey]

Long distance can work, ONLY if BOTH PARTIES are completely committed to MAKING it work. If one of you can't deal with not seeing each other (in person) regularly, or you meet somebody else and that person catches your eye, it can cause you guys to start arguing about nonsense just because there are other options available.

 

Now, MY question is, why across COUNTRY? How can they afford THAT, but not another place in YOUR town? (Or are they moving in with family?) Could he move in with YOU? (Not a good idea, I'm just thinking of ways you could stay together.)

 

Bottom line: If the long distance thing DOESN'T work out, it wasn't meant to be. If it's meant to last, long distance can't beat you guys. Good luck!

So we live in North Idaho. A tourist town in North Idaho specifically and it's pricey, and not worth it because they want to buy, not rent. They also don't have family here.

They are moving to North Carolina, it's really a lot cheaper there and they have family near as well.

 

Anyway, I turn 18 at the beginning of my senior year so if I can just get through about a year and a half of long distance I could probably maybe live with him. We have a tendency to have a harder time sorting out fights over texting and calling than in person too..but if we care enough I think we can get through it . It's just a rough situation. Thank you so much.

[Wiseman2]

It's a long way off and a lot could happen. Make the best of the time you have and see what happens with his family.

They have to move across country by the end of this next summer

[Andrina]

If you take it as a day by day situation, it'll make it easier on your mind. Try the long distance. You will see how it works as time goes by. Just make sure you have a fulfilling life besides having a boyfriend. Keep up with hanging out with girlfriends. If you don't have a hobby or interest, get one. Make plans for an education to provide you with a great career. You always want to be able to survive independently without a man, and when you have a fulfilling life besides him, if a breakup happens, you will be upset, but you won't spin into a downward spiral of complete despair.

 

I wouldn't move to his location unless you two could afford to live in your own place and not his parent's place. This will doom the relationship, because of added stress of this type of living situation. And it seems like you are the one that's ready to pick up your life and move to him. Make sure it's not always you making all of the effort. If he's not willing to move back to you when he's an adult, then what's the reason? Just know that if it doesn't work out, you will find out later in your life that it was for the best that it didn't. Most people date many partners before they have the life experience to know who is right for them and who isn't. Fewer people marry the first person they date, but it happens. Be strong enough to handle anything that comes your way in life. Take care.

[AprilHuffey]

If you take it as a day by day situation, it'll make it easier on your mind. Try the long distance. You will see how it works as time goes by. Just make sure you have a fulfilling life besides having a boyfriend. Keep up with hanging out with girlfriends. If you don't have a hobby or interest, get one. Make plans for an education to provide you with a great career. You always want to be able to survive independently without a man, and when you have a fulfilling life besides him, if a breakup happens, you will be upset, but you won't spin into a downward spiral of complete despair.

 

I wouldn't move to his location unless you two could afford to live in your own place and not his parent's place. This will doom the relationship, because of added stress of this type of living situation. And it seems like you are the one that's ready to pick up your life and move to him. Make sure it's not always you making all of the effort. If he's not willing to move back to you when he's an adult, then what's the reason? Just know that if it doesn't work out, you will find out later in your life that it was for the best that it didn't. Most people date many partners before they have the life experience to know who is right for them and who isn't. Fewer people marry the first person they date, but it happens. Be strong enough to handle anything that comes your way in life. Take care.

Thank you very very much it helps a lot. Also, for clarification, the reason it would be logical for me to move is because I was planning beforehand to go to college in that state. Which was actually coincidental