How do you know if women are safe in these sexual situations?

[ironpony]

Basically sometimes a woman I meet like in a night club while out with friends for example, will pretty much downright hit on me and sexually proposition me, right away. If I find the woman attractive, then I am usually turned on by this and would want some casual sex, once in a while.

 

However, the last woman who did this, who I was very attracted to, as soon as she gave me her address to come to, I got scared cause she lived in the rough, bad part of town. The 'ghetto' I guess we could call it.

 

So I turned her down, just in case, thinking well this woman is a complete stranger really, and I don't know her... I have done this before with women who lived in that part of town.

 

However, is there anything I can to do determine that a sexually interested stranger is safe, and likely not some possible sort of set up where they mean to harm me or use me for something else other than sex?

 

I mean when I am sought after sexually by a woman and she is interested in casual sex, I find that they are from that part of town around 60-70% of the time.

 

And this mean either two things:

 

1. People from that part of town might likely have an alternate agenda if it's 60-70%, all coming from the ghetto area...

 

2. They probably mean no harm at all and perhaps women (or men to), from the ghetto are just the type of culture to have a more sexually liberated lifestyle.

 

Now I don't mean to say one group of people is better than the other or anything like that. I'm not judging. I am just wondering what is safe, based on my own statistics of how I am approached by women and which ones want me that way.

 

What do you think?

[rosephase]

Going to a stranger's house is risky no matter what the address. Much like asking a stranger to your house. Hooking up with random people is risky. That is why some people are drawn to it. Is there a rash of crime that starts with women picking up a dude in your city? I haven't heard of something like that but that doesn't mean it doesn't happen.

 

If you like someone, get their number. Talk to them. See them more than once before going over to their place for sex.

[Wiseman2]

Anyone like that could be a hooker (or transvestite male hooker) or bring you back to her place or a friends place to mug you or lace a drink with stuff to rob you even at your place or be loaded with stds. None of them are 'safe'.

 

"Safe" is getting their number and meeting them another time in public. 'Safe' is having sex in the context of dating someone you know.

is there anything I can to do determine that a sexually interested stranger is safe

[ironpony]

Okay thanks. The last one I got her number and found her to be attractive so I am interested. However, even if I meet them in a public place first, and then have casual sex later, it could still be a set up I find, so I am not sure how much good the public place first, will do.

 

And no guys being set up like that is not common, at least not that I have heard of. But at the same time, I find it suspicious that 60-70% who say they are interested in casual sex, come from that area.

[Scoe141]

Like the old saying goes... you play with fire you're going to get burned.

 

Want to avoid the latter? Stay away from the flames.

 

Want to feel safe? Get in a relationship or get married.

[Wiseman2]

Why are you going for "ghetto", then wondering if it's safe? Maybe they will give you 'casual sex' for a price.

I find it suspicious that 60-70% who say they are interested in casual sex, come from that area.

[JaggerJim]

Basically sometimes a woman I meet like in a night club while out with friends for example, will pretty much downright hit on me and sexually proposition me, right away. If I find the woman attractive, then I am usually turned on by this and would want some casual sex, once in a while.

 

However, the last woman who did this, who I was very attracted to, as soon as she gave me her address to come to, I got scared cause she lived in the rough, bad part of town. The 'ghetto' I guess we could call it.

 

So I turned her down, just in case, thinking well this woman is a complete stranger really, and I don't know her... I have done this before with women who lived in that part of town.

 

However, is there anything I can to do determine that a sexually interested stranger is safe, and likely not some possible sort of set up where they mean to harm me or use me for something else other than sex?

 

I mean when I am sought after sexually by a woman and she is interested in casual sex, I find that they are from that part of town around 60-70% of the time.

 

And this mean either two things:

 

1. People from that part of town might likely have an alternate agenda if it's 60-70%, all coming from the ghetto area...

 

2. They probably mean no harm at all and perhaps women (or men to), from the ghetto are just the type of culture to have a more sexually liberated lifestyle.

 

Now I don't mean to say one group of people is better than the other or anything like that. I'm not judging. I am just wondering what is safe, based on my own statistics of how I am approached by women and which ones want me that way.

 

What do you think?

 

I'm thinking point number 2. But remember, these woman are taking a chance on you too.

[ironpony]

Okay thanks. Is there things I can to do find out more about what their intentions are, before proceeding?

[JaggerJim]

What about a pat-down procedure? So that your just checking for weapons and so forth.

[ironpony]

Yes there is that, but a woman could have friends waiting, or something and maybe I feel I should ascertain that. Like maybe we could hook up in a neutral place, rather than going back to hers, in that area?

[Wiseman2]

If her place looks like this go no further.

Is there things I can to do find out more about what their intentions are, before proceeding?

 

]

[JaggerJim]

Anyone like that could be a hooker (or transvestite male hooker) or bring you back to her place or a friends place to mug you or lace a drink with stuff to rob you even at your place or be loaded with stds. None of them are 'safe'.

 

"Safe" is getting their number and meeting them another time in public. 'Safe' is having sex in the context of dating someone you know.

 

Well I think what you describing has already been suggested. Did you see Wiseman's post?

[Hollyj]

Have you tried dating people, or are you only capable of hookups?

[ironpony]

My place is full of people I live with and no privacy right now. Otherwise I would. But some people I asked about it, say that is risky too cause if she has sinister friends that are waiting to do something to me, they could follow me back to my place, and then know where I live.

[Hollyj]

Have you ever considering dating women and getting to know them?

[ironpony]

Yeah, but it's a lot harder for me to get dates than to get casual sex. Me getting hit on for casual happens about once a week if I go out, where as a woman wanting more than sex and an actual date maybe once a month. It's just more difficult to get dates I guess. Plus a lot of times the dates do not go well, for some reason. Lack of chemistry or connection maybe... Where as casual sex I have just had more success.

[Hollyj]

I suggest you work on that.

[Quidam]

Its usually called personality joke aside one of my friend usually says its a friends place he checks for the week and brings them to his place. If shes crazy or has motive it kills it right there

[JaggerJim]

If you work on your relationship skills, then you won't have to mess around with all this dangerous casual stuff.

[Hollyj]

I think we are being played.

[Wiseman2]

Living at home with parents will be an issue when it comes to dating and not having your own place for both privacy in general and for sex. So picking up stuff in clubs and then doing it in a car or hoping she has a place?

 

Listen, women who are not prostitutes and can afford their own place in a desirable area are not going to be in those clubs propositioning you for "casual sex". It's like walking up to a window at mcdonalds and ordering filet mignon. but it's a lot harder for me to get dates than to get casual sex. Me getting hit on for casual happens about once a week if I go out, where as a woman wanting more than sex and an actual date maybe once a month. It's just more difficult to get dates I guess. Plus a lot of times the dates do not go well, for some reason. Lack of chemistry or connection maybe... Where as casual sex I have just had more success.

[Scoe141]

I think we are being played.

 

 

 

Oooo where's RC??? We might have one here!

[Wiseman2]

it is April fool's day, right?

 

I think we are being played.

]

[JaggerJim]

Well get a hotel room or something, anythings gotta be better than heading into the ghetto..............

[Hollyj]

My first April Fool's!