Sawyer Posted March 25, 2017 Share Posted March 25, 2017 Ok, let me begin this Love story... I'm dating my friends Brother. Love my friend, she's super cool. Although due to her financial instability, he decided to get a house with her to help her out (she had a kid that was in HS), also, he would get caught up and save money himself. Good plan, sweet man... and at the time our relationship was new so I had no problem with his choices. Fast forward six years, nothing has progressed. Love her to death, but shes irresponsible financially and he is now in a situation where he has become obligated to be her ever long safety net. Kid is grown and gone, but now another one of her adult children has moved in. He supports the majority of their household, and needless to say hasn't saved a dime and is constantly broke. He makes decent income but sustains a wonderful life for his sister and her adult kid, and does nothing for himself or for our future. He'll never get away from them, because he would be put in the position to strand them. Her credit is crap so no one will rent to her. Adult child lives off of them and pays nothing, works under table jobs. So, six years in, I still get along with his family great, but his lack of will to foster a life for us to be together is putting me in a hard position. I'm ready to live with him, (which we had already made plans to do until his sister was first laid off, then fired from next job, then took a low paying job thereafter)... I own my own home and have two children. I would really like to have a normal relationship with him. I love him, as he does me, but its turned into more of a companionship type of relationship because were not growing due to his living situation. Even if he had his own place it would be nice, as the roommate situation is awkward. We're both in our forties and not getting any younger. I was married for 27 years. He was the first person I dated after my divorce. Again, I want this relationship to work, we get along so good, and honestly hes my best friend and I want it to progress. I love him, my kids love him. I sometimes think.... if he really wanted out of there, then he would make that happen and start looking out for himself/us. But he doesn't, so what does that say? I've given him every avenue on multiple occasions to be just friends so that there aren't any expectations. Yet he continues to tell me how much he loves me, how he would be lost etc, etc... continuing to keep me emotionally attached and unable to give myself the chance to meet someone who will put our relationship as a priority. The situation sucks, obviously I dont want to be the jerk that forced him an ultimatum, leaving his family to scramble for a place to live... that would only cause me to be the piehole and surely cause tention between his family and myself. No Thanks. So what next? Have any of you dealt with this situation? Do I have love blinders on? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
This topic is now archived and is closed to further replies.