In tears everyday, losing my mind, depressed, sick

[Imke1]

Hey, I've always been SO unlucky with love and I'm getting older now, I feel so lonely, depressed, I can't sleep, i always look tired, I feel need to make myself look good anymore in effort.

I really want someone to be with, I'm on dating websites, I really do get a lot of mail but none of them go anywhere, I physically cannot be with someone if I don't fancy them, I don't have high standards but I do have to fancy them.

Each date I go on, they end up kissing me, liking me then they contact me for few days then disappear.

My recent guy I dated, I really fell for him but I didn't know he was horrid guy, who slept with his ex's when I was on holiday, it destroyed me and now he has to power to pop up and he knows I'd forgive him and want to see him but now we're both blocked, hopefully I won't hear from him anymore, he really knew how to play me, he's killing my confidence.

 

I want more than anything to have someone to love, I get jealous of everyone living with someone they adore and I'm alone, I don't have any friends around me, I can't stop crying, I was on antidepressants but every time I drank I was on the floor crying my eyes out, they kept me awake all night, stressed me so much

 

 

Myself is seriously losing it, I'm getting angry with myself, fed up alone, I'm at work fed up, unhappy and I have a regular ok office job.

I don't know what to do anymore, I'm getting older 25 and I have nothing even though I'm a good person. Phically lost it, so lonely, getting fed up of dating websites but I can't meet anyone fave to face as my confidence is a bit low to let go know anyone's interested.

Please let me know what I can do, I'm fed up of crying, feeling sloped low everyday.

[Matt3939]

You are only 25. You don't need a partner to give you self worth. Is it nice to have? Absolutely but it's not needed. Who cares about others some of those people I guarantee are miserable. Take a SO out of the equation do you have anything that you enjoy that makes you happy or any goals you are working towards?

[J Miracle]

Right when you said "25" was when you lost me. Your practically still in diapers. No need to fuss.

[mustlovedogs]

Right when you said "25" was when you lost me. Your practically still in diapers. No need to fuss.

 

I find that unnecessarily rude and condescending. 25 is an adult, and it's not like she's 13 upset she'll never find love.

 

OP, you are still young, but I get it. But you're young and good things will happen!

[catfeeder]

Each date I go on, they end up kissing me, liking me then they contact me for few days then disappear.

 

Most people can sense misery and desperation. So the goal isn't to try to trick anyone into an attraction to someone who hides her misery, but rather to work on the root of the problem--the unhappiness.

 

The best way to drill yourself into a deep hole to climb out of is the premise that you cannot be happy without a relationship. This isn't the same thing as shooting for zero desire for one, it just means that unless and until you grow into a comfortable place on your own, you're going to repel any healthy guy--and you'll only attract users who will prey on your desperation to get some sex out of the deal, or you'll otherwise attract someone who's sick and damaged enough to want to play emotional red cross.

 

So I'd work with a counselor, a woman's group, clergy, a coach--anyone you can find or hire to help you navigate past the misery and desperation, and possibly the depression. Get yourself onto a foundation of solid ground before putting yourself out there to seek for love, because people who can't find contentment in loving themselves and build a passion for interests in their lives beyond finding a partner just keep digging the pit of bad experiences that pile on more and more damage to heal from.

 

Head high, and write more if it helps.

[Rollergirl13]

I understand exactly how you feel. I'm recently divorced after 16 years together, all of my relationships since then have been failures. I have a great job, exercise, and I have plenty of hobbies. I work from home so I spend the majority of my time alone. My bf of 4 months just broke it off with me, says he lost the spark or never had it. I feel so lonely most of the time. I would never take my own life but I feel a void inside. Thought I was doing all the right things and taking care of myself but still feel empty.