patricia86 Posted March 12, 2017 Share Posted March 12, 2017 so i met this guy one month ago , he DM me on IG , the first time we met the chemistry was crazyyyy we talked for hourssss about everything !! we meet once a week and text everyday all dayyy lonnngggg he answers really fast to my texts and he usually plans our dates , yes we had sex already and nothing has changed it got even better !, we still talk for hours every time we are together ( dates involve going to the movies , dinner dates , bars ) , recently he ask me to take a trip with him and in a few weeks i might meet his friends ... my problem is that people are getting things in my head saying that we should see eachother more often and date more , that he just sees me at night and not during the day , that by now i should know if he wants something serious with me or not .... im going through school right now and for me it works perfectly i dont like a guy that is always on my ass ... we talked about relationships before and he is been looking for something serious but he doesn't want to rush into anything to fast because it has gone wrong in the past ...... im confused now because i like him and i really wanna get to know him more , should we spend more time together ? or this is going as fast as is supposed to go ? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SherrySher Posted March 12, 2017 Share Posted March 12, 2017 For all of us who "are not down "...what is DM and IG? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mustlovedogs Posted March 12, 2017 Share Posted March 12, 2017 For all of us who "are not down "...what is DM and IG? Direct message, Instagram Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dahl Posted March 12, 2017 Share Posted March 12, 2017 i met this guy one month ago we had sex nothing has changed in a few weeks i might meet his friends he just sees me at night not during the day by now i should know if he wants something serious with me or not we talked about relationships he doesn't want to rush into anything You aren't in a relationship with this bloke. You don't sound like you are so much as FWB. At least, you don't seem to be actual friends. I'm not sure how beneficial being his sexual partner is to you. You are not exclusive. Who knows how many other acquaintances with benefits this chap has. Cut your losses. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SherrySher Posted March 12, 2017 Share Posted March 12, 2017 Thanks mustlovedogs Op it does seem like you're rushing things fairly quickly, you have only known each other a month, that's not a lot of time to really know someone at all. If you're having sex, don't you think you should be asking where the relationship is headed ? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Billie28 Posted March 12, 2017 Share Posted March 12, 2017 So you have only met him 4 times? That's not a relationship! He is playing the field for sure! He plans your "dates" because he has a busy schedule planning all his dates. The trip away is never going to happen, it's a lure only. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Broomwood Posted March 12, 2017 Share Posted March 12, 2017 I think that dating someone once a week for the first few weeks in the evening is absolutely fine and normal. People have got busy schedules - not necessarily that they are busy planning other dates, but working, studying etc. And while this normal, this is not a relationship yet. This is dating. What I have a problem with is texting each other every day all day long. Common, don't you have a life? Don't you have goals, hobbies, interests, friends to make your life more balanced? What usually happens in this rushed scenarios is that a guy - usually - gets bored and moves on. Consider, the more you share with him and the more you talk in texts, the sooner he'll be able to predict with great accuracy everything you say or do. There won't be any mystery left. Any me space. Also, I'd loose respect quickly for someone who's not pursing their dreams and goals, and instead texting me all day long. I had an experience with this, and I fount it suffocating. Not only boring, suffocating but also distracting me from living my life. I got out and quickly. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
patricia86 Posted March 12, 2017 Author Share Posted March 12, 2017 I think that dating someone once a week for the first few weeks in the evening is absolutely fine and normal. People have got busy schedules - not necessarily that they are busy planning other dates, but working, studying etc. And while this normal, this is not a relationship yet. This is dating. What I have a problem with is texting each other every day all day long. Common, don't you have a life? Don't you have goals, hobbies, interests, friends to make your life more balanced? What usually happens in this rushed scenarios is that a guy - usually - gets bored and moves on. Consider, the more you share with him and the more you talk in texts, the sooner he'll be able to predict with great accuracy everything you say or do. There won't be any mystery left. Any me space. Also, I'd loose respect quickly for someone who's not pursing their dreams and goals, and instead texting me all day long. I had an experience with this, and I fount it suffocating. Not only boring, suffocating but also distracting me from living my life. I got out and quickly. HI please dont attack me i work full time and go to nursing school full time , he also has two jobs , so we text all day meaning when we have time during the day , i do have a family and social life , im not trying to rush things is people telling me that i need to rush it Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
patricia86 Posted March 12, 2017 Author Share Posted March 12, 2017 in one month we been in 6 dates , i work and go to school full time , he has two jobs Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
patricia86 Posted March 12, 2017 Author Share Posted March 12, 2017 HI im not rushing im just asking if this is the normal way to go and let things flow ... i work anf go to school full time so i dont have any problems seeing eachother only once a week Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
patricia86 Posted March 12, 2017 Author Share Posted March 12, 2017 thanks for replying Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
patricia86 Posted March 12, 2017 Author Share Posted March 12, 2017 thank you for your help Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
notalady Posted March 12, 2017 Share Posted March 12, 2017 I think things sound like they are going fine. Just see how it goes. Everyone has different pace. I asked the exclusivity question about 9-10 dates in. Do it when you feel is appropriate for you. But since you are having sex, I would at least establish that you're only having sex with each other. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
patricia86 Posted March 12, 2017 Author Share Posted March 12, 2017 Thank you , ok i will ... for now im ok with it not been official i take my time Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
HeartGoesOn Posted March 12, 2017 Share Posted March 12, 2017 I can't speak for others, but I would want to know what we are/where we stand before sleeping together. At this point, and after seeing each other a total of six different times, you're barely getting to know one another. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Broomwood Posted March 13, 2017 Share Posted March 13, 2017 HI please dont attack me i work full time and go to nursing school full time , he also has two jobs , so we text all day meaning when we have time during the day , i do have a family and social life , im not trying to rush things is people telling me that i need to rush it Apologies if it sounded like I did! My intention was only to be helpful. Well, then it is fine to see each once a week in the evening and being in close contact throughout the week. If you are both so busy, are you going to find time to see each other more often? It's by seeing each other that you get to know the other person, not by texting. Good luck, and I hope it works out for you Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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