What does the future hold? I want her back

[NAofcourse]

Hi,

 

It's been a month and a half since my first relationship break up with my partner of 2 years. It's been a hell of a ride, I love this girl dearly and always will care about her. Since the break up, it's hasn't been easy at all. I've been hurt a lot and I've hurt her. Our relationship was great despite the arguments, everything flowed well, we spent almost every minute with each other.

 

So as I mentioned, the break up was okay at the start but we ended up hurting each other a lot but we decided to cut all ties to each other and I ended it on a positive note with a simple text, Admitted my wrongs, apologised and wished her the best in whatever life brings her as I want her to be happy despite her hurting me as well, I care about her a lot. That's the type of guy I am, put everything behind me and move forward. That's where we have ended it, almost all of our photos deleted off social media, deleted and unfollowed each other and now currently doing NC to try help us both move forward. I have currently started a new job so using this time to knuckle down and start my new career!

 

So over the last 2 weeks or so, with not talking to her. I've been think about how I feel and how I want to move on in life. I've come to the conclusion that in the future, I would love to try speak to her again and see where we are in life. As of now, it isn't right! We had a amazing relationship but we need to both knuckle down for now but in 2 -3 months time, I feel like I would like to contact her again and see how things are, of course we have no strings attached or anything so as of now, she and I are both free to do what we want but I'm not looking for another relationship now at all.

 

What do you guys think of this? Is it right? Our situation for us was so perfect in the relationship, the winter didn't help being stuck in doors together all the time and we both were struggling on money so we started to get on each other's nevers, she said we could see what happens when we broke up but the 2 weeks later said didn't want to get back with me but I know she doesn't show emotion about how she's really feeling, I know she cares

[Andrina]

I would go by what she said rather than assuming she cares. I know that when I broke up with someone for a good reason, or if someone dumped me, it really pissed me off when at a future time, that person texted me. How dare they intrude on my life like that. It set me back to square one for trying to move on. Someone who cares ENOUGH will never let you go, not even once.

[Wiseman2]

Sorry to hear this. What were the arguments and breakups about? Have those issues been resolved?

 

Agree that "we spent almost every minute with each other" is a huge problem and can make you sick of each other. Why was that happening?

 

Stay no contact if she states she doesn't want to get back together. Focus on your new job, self improvement like working out, expanding your interests, etc.

 

Don't override her direct statements by projecting what you want onto her "she doesn't show emotion about how she's really feeling, I know she cares". If this were true, she wouldn't have broken up.

she and I are both free to do what we want but I'm not looking for another relationship now at all. the winter didn't help being stuck in doors together all the time and we both were struggling on money so we started to get on each other's nevers. 2 weeks later said didn't want to get back with me

[NAofcourse]

Sorry to hear this. What were the arguments and breakups about? Have those issues been resolved?

 

Agree that "we spent almost every minute with each other" is a huge problem and can make you sick of each other. Why was that happening?

 

Stay no contact if she states she doesn't want to get back together. Focus on your new job, self improvement like working out, expanding your interests, etc.

 

Don't override her direct statements by projecting what you want onto her "she doesn't show emotion about how she's really feeling, I know she cares". If this were true, she wouldn't have broken up.

 

Originally it was petty things, like just little arguements which didn't need to be arguements, very silly but just getting stressed with each other. We spend all the time with each other as she lives down my road. Everything has been so easy for us to do.

 

Since we broke up, she admitted to me she doesn't show emotion, I ended up hurting her because I was hurt and she tried to get revenge on me. Of course we are both single tho so she and I can do what we want which is fine but I felt bad as it was as I kissed another girl when I was feeling emtional. As from then we cut ties! It was a partly mutual break up, we both didn't want to do it. It we knew we had to for both of us at the time.

 

The break up was because we just weren't in a good place and both has a lot going on as well

[NAofcourse]

Of course we are both getting on with life at the moment. I agree we shouldn't be together at this time, how much I would love to be, I know we need our space to focus on our own things right now which is very much happening! Im just considering that if something was to happen in months down the line then that's okay, if it doesn't it doesn't. It wasn't meant to be