Need advice

[banana1121]

I met my boyfriend on a server on an online game 2 1/2 years ago. We started dating a month after meeting he was 18 and I was 19. After about 4 months I ended u moving a state away from him,previously was about 14 hours from him now 5, since then we visit each other every 2-3 month for a week at a time. He has been nothing but kind and patient with me. Back where i use to live I had someone close to me my brother in laws brother. We've known each-other for a very long time and get alone great and he's great. Before i moved we let each other know we have feelings for each other but we didn't do anything with it. We have talked often when im living in my new home. However for the past two years I've been going back to my home state to visit and each time id go I got the chance to see him and i'd love ever second of it was have such a nice time together wither it be watching hockey and arguing about who was better black hawks or penguins having a few drinks or just doing nothing. i just got back from a 10 day visit and we spent so much time together i loved it i didn't want it to end i cried thinking about the day i had to return back home and not be able to see his face everyday. Before moving in july of 2015 we had our first kiss i saw him the next April for my sisters wedding we danced and he told me i was beautiful we kissed again July 2016 we would go out and look for Pokemon (when Pokemon go was a thing) we kiss again. i started really caring for him in October i saw him at my sisters baby shower and was very depressed after leaving and he told me he didn't want me to leave. Now march we spent everyone of those ten days together. I left Saturday morning Thursday night we sat on the couch laughing at stupid you-tube videos and i looked into his eyes and told him i loved him. He didnt say it back but i didnt think he was going to and i didnt care he didnt. He told me he was sorry for not saying to back because he was scared due to a old girlfriend that really messed him up and i knew i was there for that. He said i was beautiful and gave him butterflies when he'd look at me and that he really cared for me a lot and i made him feel a way no one ever has before but he is unsure what it means. Now being back my boyfriend doesnt give me that same happy feeling anymore ive been depressed and saying i love you to him didnt feel right i still care for him very much but its not the same like it was and i have thought about breaking up with him but im afraid and its not the fact its to be with the other guy even if he said he couldnt love me back id still love him and feel wrong with being with my current bf so what should i do..

[Wiseman2]

Don't just stick with the bf if you are not feeling it anymore, regardless of the crush on the other guy. The other guy clearly states he isn't ready for a relationship.

 

2 half relationships don't make a whole relationship.

 

Perhaps start fresh with someone new who you really care about and who feels the same way about you.

[holistic17]

Never stay in a relationship out of fear of being alone. That's self destruction. Be honest with yourself and your boyfriend. Leave the relationship. It sounds as though the guy youre in love with isn't emotionally ready. However do not wait for him to be ready. He may never be. You need to focus on your own life for now. If you are supposed to be with this other guy, then it will manifest at the right time for you both. He clearly isn't ready to say the words or fully commit. Don't hang on for him though, as much as you might want to. It is hard but focusing on you is the best thing.

[MrSweetHarmony]

I hope you will have a desire to become sophisticated, in saying that I'm not encouraging you to be arrogant. There is so much to learn about the people who live in this world and the planet we live on, I explored spiritually and wow, love is something so different to what I thought it was when I was 19. Take it or leave it, the choice is yours.