Long Distance Relationship

[Navo]

I'm a 27 year old student with a normal class schedule on top of my dad asking for a hand with working on a house every so often. She is a 26 year old workaholic who lives at her dad's place 4 hours away. She works as a care giver for old people, so it's not uncommon for her to work 12 hour shifts. We normally text throughout the day every day until we are both available to make plans to see each other. This has been working so far, but lately she has been working more, and more. She has been feeling too tired to text? How can one be to tired to do the most lazy thing possible? lol Anyway, today she only sent me one message in the morning to reply to my good morning text, but nothing after that. I'm trying hard not to worry about her, but honestly it's keeping me awake at night thinking about it. I'm used to talking to her on the phone till 1, or 2 in the morning, but lately she has been avoiding the idea of phone calls, and going to bed around 8, or 9. I'm mainly writing this to blow off steam so I don't blow up her phone, but if anyone has any input, go ahead and shoot.

[Betterwithout]

You will need a healthy dose of patience when it comes to a long distance relationship as it is. Your situation is more amplified since she is a workaholic working long hours and burning herself out. Her job sounds demanding and exhausting. Yes texting can seem like a chore after this.

Continue to be there for her and keep being patient.

 

Is there a chance to plan to see each other in person for a mini vacation to reconnect? Do you have a future plan of moving closer together at some point?

[Wiseman2]

How did you meet, how long have you been dating? How often do you see each other?

 

Texting is not a relationship, LDR or not. If she's working all day don't expect a text-buddy or phone-pal

 

Get busy with school clubs, groups, events volunteer and time with friends, family. Get involved in your own local life more.

Don't text-tether people. Perhaps she met a local guy which would make more sense for both of you to do.

I'm a 27 year old student. She is a 26 year old workaholic who lives at her dad's place 4 hours away. but lately she has been working more, and more. She has been feeling too tired to text? I'm used to talking to her on the phone till 1, or 2 in the morning, but lately she has been avoiding the idea of phone calls, and going to bed around 8, or 9.

[tattoobunnie]

I'm a 27 year old student with a normal class schedule on top of my dad asking for a hand with working on a house every so often. She is a 26 year old workaholic who lives at her dad's place 4 hours away. She works as a care giver for old people, so it's not uncommon for her to work 12 hour shifts. We normally text throughout the day every day until we are both available to make plans to see each other. This has been working so far, but lately she has been working more, and more. She has been feeling too tired to text? How can one be to tired to do the most lazy thing possible? lol Anyway, today she only sent me one message in the morning to reply to my good morning text, but nothing after that. I'm trying hard not to worry about her, but honestly it's keeping me awake at night thinking about it. I'm used to talking to her on the phone till 1, or 2 in the morning, but lately she has been avoiding the idea of phone calls, and going to bed around 8, or 9. I'm mainly writing this to blow off steam so I don't blow up her phone, but if anyone has any input, go ahead and shoot.

 

When my hubby and I dated long distance, we only text each other maybe once a week, but we spent our weekends together. Texting - ugh, it really can be a chore! I think you should schedule 20 minutes a day to talk, and it could be at a specific time during the week when she's driving home. What time does she work?

[Navo]

We met online about three, or four years ago. We dated for a year, broke up, and started dating again about two years later. Now we have been dating for almost a year again. We see each other as often as our schedules allow. This semester I go to a night class that's on her first off day. Last semester I could just drive there after class on Wednesday to spend her off days with her. It worked great, but History was only available as a night class on Thursdays this semester. Nothing I could do about that.

[Navo]

Tattoobunnie, I already tried that idea. It worked for a few weeks, but now she comes up with reasons she can't talk on the phone.

[Navo]

Betterwithout, I'm going to see her this weekend actually, but she is working on her off days again, so I'll be bored waiting for her to get home for three days. Not much time to reconnect with someone who works like she does. As for a vacation, we are supposed to go ride atvs for a weekend later in April, but I can see her canceling at the last second. That, or the "I forgot, so I made other plans." card.

[Betterwithout]

Betterwithout, I'm going to see her this weekend actually, but she is working on her off days again, so I'll be bored waiting for her to get home for three days. Not much time to reconnect with someone who works like she does. As for a vacation, we are supposed to go ride atvs for a weekend later in April, but I can see her canceling at the last second. That, or the "I forgot, so I made other plans." card.

 

Sounds like you have a lot of resentment which might show in body language and conversation. What was the reason you broke up last time?

Have you any future plans on moving forward with the relationship (moving in together)

[Gary Snyder]

Workaholics and people who break dates are problematic. I would not worry about text and phone too much, dates are what's important. I see you are spending three days with her... or really just nights, lol, but that's still good. How often do you see her?