Fiancee messaging ex on Facebook

[Matty1988445]

Hey😊

 

Didn't think I would ever be messaging on one off these sites but here we go

 

Got with my girlfriend 20 months ago got engaged a year ago and thought everything was going fine a few ups and downs but nothing major there was a lot off stuff with exs on her part at the start but thought it had all stopped when we got engaged till last month I noticed she was off me a bit and never off her phone so was getting my mind all worked up when a message came up saying hi from her ex and I know I shouldn't off as need to give her privacy but for the fist time I looked at her message and scrolled back and she had been texting him for the last week 😕😕 and there's a lot about him talking about when they used to be together and they used to have sex and did she enjoy to what she put yes very much them they carried on talking and the recent ones without going to much into it was about meeting up at a football match 😊 am I reading to much into this and is this acceptable when we are engaged I love this girl but it's difficult to trust her now

 

Any advice out there as getting me down

 

Thanks in advance matt

[Wiseman2]

Sorry to hear this. How long before you started dating did they break up?

 

Sadly you can give her diamonds, ask her to get him off her phone but she can retain him in her heart and mind. She's chatting and talking about plans of meeting him, yeah that's cheating, no?

 

Was this a rebound whirlwind relationship for her? 20 mos and engaged already sounds like things moved quite quickly, right?

there was a lot off stuff with exs on her part at the start but thought it had all stopped when we got engaged. she had been texting him for the last week and there's a lot about him talking about when they used to be together and they used to have sex and did she enjoy to what she put yes very much and the recent ones about meeting up at a football match

[nsolo]

"she put yes very much them they carried on talking and the recent ones without going to much into it was about meeting up at a football match 😊 am I reading to much into this and is this acceptable when we are engaged I love this girl but it's difficult to trust her now "

 

I just wrote a pretty long response to this, but then I realized the most important thing is this:

 

If she's not head-over-heels in love with you, then y'all have no business getting married.

 

At this point, it sounds like she has one foot out the door. You can work on re-attracting her if you'd like by studying/reading different materials on how attraction works, but if she's going to cheat on you, then you absolutely do not want to ever marry this woman either way unless you're fine with her cheating on you in the future too.

 

Honestly, I'd break it off with her and look for other women. You can find a much better woman than this one. The woman of your dreams doesn't chat with her ex and talk about sex with him behind your back.

[Hollyj]

Sorry, but this is not going to work.

 

The convo is completely inappropriate, and it sounds like she will always need attention from others.

 

End it.

[jennylove]

Not appropriate!!!!

Show her the door!!

If someone doesn't want to be in your life, show them the door.

She clearly doesn't want to be in your life b/c she clearly doesn't want her ex out of her life. Get your ring back and say goodbye to this one!!

[angrythoughts]

What she's doing is wrong. You're not reading into it at all. You're reading it correctly. Definitely talk to her about it. I would say dump her honestly but I know anyone who comes to these forums won't take such action, even though they obviously should (including myself).

 

Good luck.

[Snny]

Kick her to the curb and do not look back. She has no respect for your upcoming marriage. Time to dump her ass.