zredbird Posted February 25, 2017 Share Posted February 25, 2017 So my ex had broken up with me 2 weeks ago and since then he had been stringing me along saying he wants to get back, then he doesn't etc. The day after he broke up with me he said he'd made a mistake and loves me and wanted to get back which i was hesitant on and he started saying i dont care about him etc. I agreed to meet him at the end of the week and we were getting on so well but he started an argument and got annoyed over something stupid, he told his friends i could give them all a lift without asking me so i brought it up and he got really really angry saying i was starting an argument for no reason and made me cry. After that he said he didn't know if he wanted to be with me but continued to message me. We met up again last wednesday and he said he wanted to get back into a relationship so i agreed, but he then changed his mind the day after. The same day, we were at a party together and he had a panic attack because my friends told him to leave me alone and i stayed with him the whole night calming him down. He kept saying how sorry he is and how amazing and beautiful I am that he loves me so much and always will and doesn't ever want to hurt me. So we continued talking all that week just like we were together again, he'd invite me round and put me on his social media etc. until one day he ignored my message. So i later messaged him asking what we were and he said he doesn't know. I said does he want me in his life and he said yes of course but he doesn't want to be in a relationship. He said he didn't want the commitment but I found out the real reason from his 2 best friends. I'm the first girlfriend he's had and he isn't the type of guy to let out his feelings or fall for girls (he was basically a massive player before me) and gets scared when he feels proper emotions. So he fell in love with me and it scared him because he was vunerable and not in control of the situation so he tried to gain control back by stringing me along and having me beg for him. Also all his friends have been saying to me they feel really bad because he's being such an idiot and he will never get any better than me. Anyway, i messaged him saying this is his last chance to show me how he feels and try to keep me, but he kept turning it on me saying i obviously dont want to be with him. I asked if he wants to be in a relationship and he said he doesn't but he wants me in his life still, but i said i can't do it like this. I sent a big paragraph ending it and he fought back saying he'd been saying this for weeks (he hadn't) and i woke up this morning to find out he deleted me on snapchat and instagram. But later, i went on a dog walk with my friend and one of his friends and he messaged his friend getting really annoyed at him for it. What do i do? I was hoping he would come back to me saying he's made a mistake like he did before but i don't know what it means by him deleting me. My idea is to message him after a week on facebook or text him something, maybe asking if we could meet up to talk but I dont know, I'll be seeing him every day now at collage so it's going to be so hard. I'm so in love with him and want to be with him so badly, I honestly feel like this was true love it was so passionate and pure, someone please help. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Silverbirch Posted February 25, 2017 Share Posted February 25, 2017 I believe you need to stay away from him so he can sort himself out. It. Sounds like he needs professional help. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jibralta Posted February 25, 2017 Share Posted February 25, 2017 He said he didn't want the commitment but I found out the real reason from his 2 best friends. I'm the first girlfriend he's had and he isn't the type of guy to let out his feelings or fall for girls (he was basically a massive player before me) and gets scared when he feels proper emotions. So he fell in love with me and it scared him because he was vunerable and not in control of the situation so he tried to gain control back by stringing me along and having me beg for him. Oh no. Don't buy into this ego-inflating BS. You're being manipulated all over the place. I was going to list the examples from your post, but frankly, your whole post is just one example running into another: He wants you. He changed his mind. You made him mad. He wants you. He changed his mind. He had a panic attack. Only you can calm him down. He's weak and scared and he needs you to do what ever he wants you to do in order to make him feel better. Because you're special and the only one that can help him. So keep dangling from that string, even when he stops making sense. No, no, no, no, no. I know it hurts to lose somebody that you care about, but he's jerking you around. Losing him would be a blessing in disguise. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SooSad33 Posted February 25, 2017 Share Posted February 25, 2017 he wants me in his life still, but i said i can't do it like this - Exactly... STOP with the head games. He's out.. then walk! No. You cannot be 'friends' with an ex until you know those 'feelings' are all gone. And I don't feel he is the least bit 'able' to give you what you want in a relationship. Respectfully walk away from all of this. ( go bk up to top.. to where you said.. HE broke it off 2 wks. ago.. and is STILL stringing you along). Then YOU react by no longer being dragged thru this anymore... for your own self. I honestly feel like this was true love it was so passionate and pure - Was it?? Not anymore It's done... he's not for you.. like I said.. Respect YOURSELF and walk from all of this.. Heal & move on. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Wiseman2 Posted February 25, 2017 Share Posted February 25, 2017 How long were you dating? It doesn't matter why he is jerking you around. What matters is he's telling you this, then that then the other. Don't buy into the whole "poor him he's fragile so that's why he treats me like crap" thing. It's up to you to decide whether you want a guy who is consistent or be strung along by this guys indecision. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
zredbird Posted February 25, 2017 Author Share Posted February 25, 2017 he is completely emotionally unstable i think Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
zredbird Posted February 25, 2017 Author Share Posted February 25, 2017 so you think i should not try and get him back? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
zredbird Posted February 25, 2017 Author Share Posted February 25, 2017 he was consistant for 4 months straight like completely in love with me would post me everywhere to show me off etc it was just until this incident happened which i forgot to mention, i was out for my friends birthday and got too drunk and this guy who was there got my phone off me and messaged my boyfriend saying "can i get with your girlfriend" and this really upset him he refused to speak to me for 2 days and we were even better than before for about a week after until then it started to go downhill Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Wiseman2 Posted February 25, 2017 Share Posted February 25, 2017 A great lesson to learn about dating is that you can't fix broken birds. Take the rescuing tendency and volunteer at an animal shelter where that quality is appreciated and properly directed. You may also meet some nice people and some nice guys who have their heads on straight.he is completely emotionally unstable i think Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jibralta Posted February 25, 2017 Share Posted February 25, 2017 so you think i should not try and get him back? Yes, I think you should cut him loose. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
angrythoughts Posted February 25, 2017 Share Posted February 25, 2017 If a guy is going back and forth in regards to whether they want to be with you or not then that should give you the green light to leave him alone. Don't wait like a dog for him to want u back, just to tell you 5 hours later he actually doesn't want you back. He's indecisive because you're not what he wants right now. Of course there's a chance you guys would be back together, but why would you want to? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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