Jump to content

Wife thought I shaved body hair I never had, is she cheating


Recommended Posts

I had my shirt off this morning and my wife of 23 years asked why I shaved my shoulder hair. I have never had body hair from birth on shoulders, back. I shared this with my sister and she thinks she is having affair with a man that has shoulder hair and just mistaken the 2 of us. Any thoughts.

Link to comment

Reading your previous post, since she has cheated on you in the past, I wouldn't be surprised if she is trying to find ways to accuse you of the same.

No one here can tell you if she is cheating on you with another man. If you both do not trust each other, why are you together? why haven't you taken advantage of counseling?

Link to comment

Um, I think that's a far stretch from what she was asking?


When my husband once shaved as a teenager after months of dating, it took until I touched his face to realize he had shaved it off. And I'm considerd beyond observant and detail-oriented. It's just when it comes to weight and facial hair, totally blows over my head.


Have you been cheating on her? Are things not right lately? Does something feel off?

Link to comment

I did forgive her for an emotional affair and had moved past it. I then , recently discovered that she hung out with an old friend at the beach and at a bar and her girlfriend told me that she had her hands all over this guy. She denied it and then I found the pictures of them with her hands all over him and then she still denied it.So that brought up old trust issues. I just thought it weird that she thought I shaved off body hair I have never had.

Link to comment
I had my shirt off this morning and my wife of 23 years asked why I shaved my shoulder hair. I have never had body hair from birth on shoulders, back. I shared this with my sister and she thinks she is having affair with a man that has shoulder hair and just mistaken the 2 of us. Any thoughts.


I keep my skepticism bright-eyed and bushy-tailed as a general rule, but this didn't strike me as necessarily incriminating.


Could she be hinting (not suggesting this, just offering an example of another avenue you could consider) that she wants you to do some manscaping? Or something similarly innocuous? How is your communication, in general?

Link to comment

maybe she is cheating.

but if you havent seen any signs of cheating do not stir up something that just could have been a mistake.

what if she was thinking of someone else and didnt mean to say that so you? even though she shouldnt think of anyone else while layong next to you.

whats was her response when you approached the situation ?

Link to comment

Also, I once ask my husband if he trimmed his nether regions one day last year. And I've known him since he was 16. And no, he has never trimmed. We are 38 btw.


God, I sound dense.


But either way, I've never cheated on him emotionally, physically, financially, or even with flirting. If it takes one comment about whether you trimmed or not to really send you questioning, it's time to either hash it out, get couples counseling, or pack it up, and call it a day on this marriage, because she definitely is not cherishing you.

Link to comment

I got the whole hair thing twice. I always trimmed my privates. I couldn't see how a woman would want to go near something not kept up. It's actually my last 2 relationships. One I think she was actually used to hairy guys (that i am) she didn't complain just was surprised that I took care of it. The other was a problem. It wasn't an issue before the insecurity came to be. She told me to never shave trim down there. I said I have forever. Well I did stop. She thought I only did it cause I was with others. Almost laughable I did it for her and me oh well. So it might mean nothing or it might who knows.

Link to comment


I mean, if she's remembering hair that never existed, who knows. But I agree with you OP it is weird. 23 years is a long time and for her to all of a sudden not recall.

I would say it's weird but not necessarily malicious.

Bit insulting too..I don't think I'd like it if someone recalled something about me that wasn't even the case. But I wouldn't put it down to cheating.

Link to comment

Hmmm. Is it not strange that the woman you have been married to for 23 whole years would not know that you did not have shoulder hair? I know where every mole and every birthmark and every bit of hair is on my boyfriend's body and that is after 4 years!


Yes, of course it is possible your wife is having an affair and confused you and her lover.


But... you do not know for sure.


Why do you assume this of your wife? Do you trust her? And have you seen OTHER signs in addition to this comment? One sign alone rarely points to an affair. It is a series of actions and things that do not add up consistently. So, for there to be something going on, you would be needing to see not only other signs or "red flags" but you would be seeing them consistently. Perhaps not every day but they would be repeating themselves, causing you to question what is happening. Do not discount your gut instinct either. This is very valuable. So, if you feel something is not right and you see other signs, then you should investigate further. Keep quiet and keep watch.


If you actually mention it to her and she IS cheating, she will only deny it and continue doing it, trying to hide things better.


I am wondering how your sister jumped to that conclusion? I would like to say it could have been an innocent statement but I don't think it is. Unless you are your wife have not been having sex for years or sleep in separate beds or never see each other naked, I cannot wrap my mind around why she would say such a thing.


Wait and see is all you can do. You cannot hang her on that one statement. But what it does is arouse your suspicion to keep watching her. Time will tell. If somebody is cheating, the truth will always come out because they all slip up eventually once they get too confident.


Good luck.

Link to comment


This topic is now archived and is closed to further replies.

  • Create New...