In love but different religions

[Purplestars14]

Hi everyone, I thought I would post this to see if anyone is in the same situation and for some advice from someone I don't know. So here it goes...

 

I have been with my Muslim boyfriend for 4 years and we have always had diffcuilities in our relationship due to me being an atheist. At first when we met he did say to me that in the future I would have to convert if I wanted to marry him/ have children. At the time I agreed as i was falling in love and felt like it it wasn't impossible.

 

However, after some consideration I started to think that this wasn't right for me and told him that I wasn't prepared to do this. Before our relationship started He lived in a foreign country and after some time he came to live with me in England.

 

I have never met his parents.. and I feel like we are living a secret as they do not know about me. We are in a strong, happy and healthy relationship but he will not tell his parents about me because I am not a Muslim and occasionally I drink alcohol which he is not best pleased with.

 

We both love eachother so much but I feel we cannot move forward in our relationship as he feels his parents would disown him if he told them about me. He is not willing to tell them and said he will only tell them about me if I stop certain things and convert which I have already said that I'm not going to do.

 

This same situation has been going round and round in circles for some time and we do not seem to be getting no where... any advice would be great thanks.

[Wiseman2]

Sorry to hear this. He's stringing you along for premarital sex (interesting he's ok with fornicating but not alcohol, no?) and a place to live until his parents arrange his marriage to a nice Muslim virgin woman.

[Seraphim]

If he has not told his family he is not going to. He would face being disowned. To even be close to being accepted you would have to convert to Islam and raise your kids in that faith.

[itsallgrand]

If it weren't for a religion, would you put up with this from a man and stay with him? Serious question. If he wasn't Muslim, would you allow a man to hide you from his family? To tell you he can not be serious with you unless you change your entire belief system, world view, way of life, and you'd actually consider that a reasonable request to be with somebody?

 

I'm not making a comment on religion, but rather that he is using his religion as an excuse for very poor behaviour. He's using you for sex, doesn't show you basic respect, keeps you a dirty secret while he enjoys a gf experience with you.. yet will commit nothing.

 

Everything about this says 'next'. Do you want marriage and kids? Do you want a bad who is proud of you and wants everyone to know he is with you? If you do, and not just to be ' in love'- this guy isn't for you.

[Capricorn3]

I feel we cannot move forward in our relationship as he feels his parents would disown him if he told them about me. He is not willing to tell them and said he will only tell them about me if I stop certain things and convert which I have already said that I'm not going to do.

 

This same situation has been going round and round in circles for some time and we do not seem to be getting no where... .

You're right, this relationship is not going anywhere. Ever. Unless, of course, you convert. That is the ONLY way this will ever move forward and you have already stated you will not convert. Basically, you are both wasting each other's time.

 

SAs you have said you will not convert, You have two choices:

 

1) Continue living as you are - a secret and forever hidden from his family and never getting married.

 

2) Leave. And find someone who doesn't force his religion on you and keeps you hidden from his family.