caiitlyn Posted February 16, 2017 Posted February 16, 2017 (Im going to apologize for my grammar in advance because im just typing whats exactly whats in my head.) In my first semester, there was this guy in my psychology class. Towards the end of the semester I had grew the balls to go up to him and give him my number. He ended up texting me and he had told me that he has a girlfriend. I tried to back off because I thought it was the right thing to do considering that he isn't available. He wanted to get to know me. we talked for the rest of the day. then we stopped. A week before the finals we've been talking everyday for a little over a month. when I went away for vacation he had told me that him and his girlfriend had broken up. He broke up with her because she was hiding stuff from him and was lying to him. when I got back, it was around new years and he told me that his ex's family had invited him to go hang out with him. So i said to him that if there wasn't anything for me to worry about then go. Then I asked if he still had feelings for her. He told me that he still did then I told him that because he still had feelings for her, I didn't want to continue whatever we were. He didn't want to stop talking to me so we settled on being friends. But we ended up to be friends with benefits. On Jan 1st to 5th we had rounds of sex everyday. (don't judge, it is my life) the first time after we had sex he was like "You're something else" "What am I going to do with you" "where they make you at?" then next day i texted him but it didn't go thru so I thought he had blocked me or something but he ended up texting me through his cousins phone and he seemed to be annoyed that I didn't text him at all (which I did text him, he just didn't get it.) then there was another time when I thought that I had texted him but i didn't. He texted me the middle finger emoji, and I asked him what that was about and he said "you didn't text me all damn day" and we had an whole argument about me not texting him. there was also few other times where we would have arguments that i took too long to answer him or i post on social media before i texted him back. He's worse then I am but I didn't say anything about it considering we were just friends with benefits. But it always seemed like it was okay when he did it but its a big deal when I did it. I haven't seen him for two weeks because I had winter courses and I didn't have the time to see him because i was super busy. We planned out to hang out on a friday but that didn't happen because he hung out with his ex girlfriend. I would've been fine if he wanted to take a rain check. But he didn't tell me at all and I only found out because she was posting on his snapchat. Then I didn't talk to him for a whole entire week to think things through. so when I talked to him i told him that i wanted to be just friends and nothing more. He got really mad? he was saying things like "are you ok?" "Whats wrong with you" "where is this coming from" "You're unbelievable." I told him because his ex was still in the picture and I didn't wanna relive my past. then I had mentioned that He always got mad at me because of me not texting him. he says he was joking but to be quite honest, it seriously didn't seem like he was joking at all. I then told him that it would be less complicated it we weren't having sex. and he agreed. then we hung out and he totally ignored everything i said to him and we had sex (Yes I know, it was dumb and I shouldn't have) I slept over his house and he took me the home next day, I left the car thinking that we were fine. The next day, he BLOCKS me on everything including my number. At first I thought that it was me. That I did something wrong. But I actually didn't because all i tried to do was stop. So the next thing I thought was that he got back with his girlfriend. (which he did) I was pretty upset because I had gotten no explanation. Yes I would've felt some type of way if he told me that he was going to get back with his ex but it wasn't like i didn't know that he still had feelings for him I knew he was gonna go back to her, I just didn't understand why he didn't take the time to tell me "Hey im thinking about getting back with my ex" or "hey I am getting back with my ex" I wouldn't have stopped him or be mad at him. I would've understood. But he obviously didn't take the time to tell me but went out of his way to block me on everything. Do you think he will end up texting me when him and his girlfriend breaking up again? (I only would want him to so I can call him out with what he did for some closer but a part of me doesn't think that he will...) I clearly had some type of feelings towards him and what he did hurt. Please no judgements. I want to know different types of opinions. Thanks!
Betterwithout Posted February 16, 2017 Posted February 16, 2017 Sounds to me that FWB is fine with him for now and he is not giving you 100% of his attention, which doesn't enable you to give 100% attention of grow into a real BF GF relationship. I don't know if this drama is helping anybody. You should wait until his feelings are sorted out with his ex, and to you. As far as him texting you when he breaks up, you should go NC instead. Develop other friendships with friends and work on yourself. Life is too short for waiting for this guy. Just my $0.02
Wiseman2 Posted February 16, 2017 Posted February 16, 2017 Sorry this happened. Unfortunately you did this to yourself by hanging out with a jerk who has an on/off gf and only wanted fwb. He was pretty clear on that all along. He ended up texting me and he had told me that he has a girlfriend. we ended up to be friends with benefits.We planned out to hang out on a friday but that didn't happen because he hung out with his ex girlfriend. then we hung out and he totally ignored everything i said to him and we had sex.The next day, he BLOCKS me on everything including my number.Do you think he will end up texting me when him and his girlfriend breaking up again? I only would want him to so I can call him out with what he did for some closer
CrystalBNY Posted February 16, 2017 Posted February 16, 2017 Sounds to me like he never really broke up with this so called "ex" and was just using you for a good time. You shouldn't worry if he will or won't come back. Focus on yourself and school. The right one will come along and you won't have to share him with another woman.
HeartGoesOn Posted February 16, 2017 Posted February 16, 2017 What made you doubt him when he told you he still has feelings for his ex? Not to sound harsh, but you willingly walked right into this. Hopefully you'll "up" your value, and take it as a lesson learned.
caiitlyn Posted February 17, 2017 Author Posted February 17, 2017 I tried to push him away many times but he kept latching on. But you are right. I should've pushed him away harder.
caiitlyn Posted February 17, 2017 Author Posted February 17, 2017 I know I did. & he was clear in the beginning, but as time went on he didn't seem clear. Because if he was clear about being just FWB he shouldn't have made it a huge problem when ever i don't text him or take "too long" to answer. and pointed out little things like how i stopped sharing my location and taking my read off.
Jibralta Posted February 17, 2017 Posted February 17, 2017 He's an opportunist and a manipulator. It will go on as long as you let it go on, but it will never get better.
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