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Erection problems and what to do


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That's a good opening line there! Thanks! I did ask him previously and the things he said that turn him on are all pretty basic. Stuff that we do, nothing new.

But I'll ask him again and build on it to lead to the discussion.


Yey! Now I feel like I am not in the unknown waters any longer!


Good luck. . this is really common. . So someone out there has to have had some success with it

Just don't give up without trying. You have nothing to lose here.

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As a guy and IF I had this issue I would be well aware of it and hoping you didn't notice. Of course you have and the sooner you talk about it the better.


The best way to talk about this is when sex is not on the table or just finished. Never bring this kind of thing up after or just before sex. If you are both sitting on the couch watching TV bring it up like this:


_____ I have something that has been on my mind and I need to talk to you about it. When we are intimate I noticed you are not completely aroused and I wanted to know if you aren't that sexually attracted to me? (if you word it this way it opens the door but it is about you not him)


Then he will say either Yes I can't keep my boner because you don't do it for me or No it isn't you, it's me. Then you can ask if this has been a problem in the past and then ask if he has seen a doctor about it and on and on. Don't grill the guy about his wiener problems but make it a discussion and see where it leads.

He could be rubbing one out to often, watching to much porn, have a blood pressure problem, pinched nerve, nervous or low T count.


If you don't want to go down that path then you need to break up with him. Either way not an easy road ahead but it needs to be done sooner than later,


Good luck



Lost, thanks a lot for this! (I thought I have responded to you but can't see my answer, hence it's again). Makes perfect sense to me. Will take your advice on board for a talk on Friday.

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Maybe start the conversation with something manly. Excuse me I don't have a hammer but I'd like a hole in the sheet rock about waist hight. Would you mind doing that without using any of your limbs? If he looks at you dumbfounded hand him a viagra. He will get the idea. Though I'm sure he is very well aware.

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Surprise, surprise! Here goes the suite.. Ironically after I've prepped up for the talk, it turns out there's no sex issue to talk about. During sex, he was so hard, and all the time, it was awesome. I think he was surprised himself, and also proud of himself. He kept saying, "I am so hard for you". I didn't do anything special, or we didn't do anything special. He was hard the first time in five times we had sex.. Maybe he took some viagra secretly, who knows. Next time will tell, I suppose.

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Great to hear Broomwood. If you stop and think about it, erections are kind of miraculous that they happen in the first place. Mostly psychologically affected.

Perhaps you both are on the same page in your relationship and your sexual feelings allowing this to erection to occur. (might not be Viagra)


As Elaine said from Seinfeld during the 'shrinkage' episode. "I don't know how you guys walk around with those things."



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