I am overthinking about it.

[TeddyBlac]

I have been in a relationship for two years and we always break up and come back together again. And it has always been awesome getting back, the love even grew stronger. I dont know how (though she is the one always begging for me to take her back) but i never used it against her, maybe by treating her bad or assaulting her, so the love grew even stronger. Recently i broke up with her again (She was draining me emotionally, i lost my life in making her happy, she depends on me for her happiness, a changed alot of my pattern just to make her happy and it was killing me, i was not happy at all. She was selfish, yes she was, she doesnt care about me that much, the way i think it should be so it made me unhappy (i sometimes wonder what kind of love is her own, she loves me i know but she doesnt show it, i dont feel it at all, i mean at all, i was in relationship but i felt lonely. I also something wasnt right about the relationship. The only thing i feel is her numerous calls and chats that is all.) Then i summoned the courage i broke it off. Then fews weeks later we came back together but this time , she thought i came back because i cant do without her so she started behaving in a more selfish and stubborn because she thought i came back because i couldnt leave (I came back because i wanted to give it another try) Then we broke up again, due to her high level of selfish. I told her she admitted it this time she started begging me, using all type of manipulative skills, just to make me take her back. Now she sounds changed i am confused on whether to take her back or not. I am confused. I have been on no contact with her for one months and one week now. But within this period she she has called me twice. She sounded changed. I am having sleepness night on whether to take her back, maybe she has changed or not (Because we have never been apart for this long) our break up is always one day or two days then we are back so there has not been time to think and reminisce. Someone should help me look into this matter.. It is normal to have a feeling of taking your ex back ? Should i take her back ?

[MissCanuck]

I have been in a relationship for two years and we always break up and come back together again. And it has always been awesome getting back, the love even grew stronger. I dont know how (though she is the one always begging for me to take her back) but i never used it against her, maybe by treating her bad or assaulting her, so the love grew even stronger. Recently i broke up with her again (She was draining me emotionally, i lost my life in making her happy, she depends on me for her happiness, a changed alot of my pattern just to make her happy and it was killing me, i was not happy at all. She was selfish, yes she was, she doesnt care about me that much, the way i think it should be so it made me unhappy (i sometimes wonder what kind of love is her own, she loves me i know but she doesnt show it, i dont feel it at all, i mean at all, i was in relationship but i felt lonely. I also something wasnt right about the relationship. The only thing i feel is her numerous calls and chats that is all.) Then i summoned the courage i broke it off. Then fews weeks later we came back together but this time , she thought i came back because i cant do without her so she started behaving in a more selfish and stubborn because she thought i came back because i couldnt leave (I came back because i wanted to give it another try) Then we broke up again, due to her high level of selfish. I told her she admitted it this time she started begging me, using all type of manipulative skills, just to make me take her back. Now she sounds changed i am confused on whether to take her back or not. I am confused. I have been on no contact with her for one months and one week now. But within this period she she has called me twice. She sounded changed. I am having sleepness night on whether to take her back, maybe she has changed or not (Because we have never been apart for this long) our break up is always one day or two days then we are back so there has not been time to think and reminisce. Someone should help me look into this matter.. It is normal to have a feeling of taking your ex back ? Should i take her back ?

 

OP, I'm not sure if something has been lost in translation here - but what do you mean by treating her bad and "assaulting" her? I hope you don't mean that literally.

 

Your relationship was very dysfunctional and unhealthy. Breaking up and making up is a sign you don't work together, and it often implies there's a degree of emotional immaturity from one or both people. This cycle does not strengthen or deepen love, as you are seeing. It breeds resentment and toxicity.

 

You two need to stay broken up.

[Tanzi]

OP, I'm not sure if something has been lost in translation here - but what do you mean by treating her bad and "assaulting" her? I hope you don't mean that literally.

 

I think he meant he DIDN'T do those things. I'm still not sure though.

 

OP, if she is all these things, why do you keep taking her back? It makes absolutely no sense. You've broken up that many times it just seems ludicrous to want to try again, especially as it sounds as though you don't even like her that much.

 

I think she was right. You can't live without her. Why is that?

[Wiseman2]

Breaking up repeatedly won't change her. It sounds like all the relationship has going for it is good makeup sex. Do you both see others during these breakups? What the purpose of them? Do you fight/argue too much?

I have been in a relationship for two years and we always break up and come back together again. And it has always been awesome getting back, the love even grew stronger.

[DancingFool]

So your break ups make your love so much stronger that it just leads straight into the next break up????

 

Sweetie, break ups are your clue that you two are not compatible and should stay broken up permanently and seek out other people to date who are better for each of you. Giving things a second chance after clearing away what lead to the break up in the first place is one thing, giving things a 10th, 20th, 50th chance.....is the definition of insanity. Please stop, delete and block her and move on.

[Pretzel]

You seem to be addicted to the highs and lows, and specifically, the 'high' of reconciliation, as you write 'the love grows stronger each time'. But the thing is, after a certain point, your numerous break ups just become silly. A healthy functioning relationship that is ACTUALLY sustainable shouldn't be this difficult. I'm sorry to say something just isn't right between you. And it might work for a while when you get back together, but then the reality of your dynamic evidently rears it's ugly head each time, dragging you towards another break up. It's up to you what you do, but be wary that each time you break up and get back together, you are using up TONNES of energy and time that you could be dedicating towards a more worthwhile thing in your life that will make it to your future.

[holistic17]

Your girlfriend sounds needy, insecure and manipulative. A healthy relationship is supposed to be happy and equal for both people. You've said she drains you and is selfish. Perhaps on your next conversation with her yoy should ask her what's she's done to feel like she's changed? She could easily just be trying another approach to make you think she's different. The pretense won't last long. It's your call but given the repeated breakups, your future together looks bleak. Sorry to say this.