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My Odyssey


Sportster2005
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She seemed to mention previous dates too easily. That usually means impending friend zone. But we'll see.

 

sometimes this is a bad thing -- but sometimes its a good thing - if someone is nervous -- they are trying to bring up the "dating" topic and letting you know that they date. some people talk a lot when they are nervous. Just keep an open mind...and open eyes, I guess. Glad that you are moving forward.

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S, I am much like you describe when I meet someone. I was like that when I first met Slush; am likely to be similar when I meet this new man tomorrow. In part I am reading his cues. In part, I am slow to attach, and don't want to hold your hand or curl into your shoulder until I trust you more.

 

I agree of could go either way. I am guessing she is available to you to explore further given the agreement for saturday.

 

Consider - once us old heads figure out that we may need a long time to find a compelling match, we are basically committed to being single until convinced otherwise. Gotta love the skin your in.

 

 

A good date.

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  • 3 months later...
Short answer is, I'm not sure. It was pleasant enough, and it was just a first meet. We did talk a lot. We went for three hours. When I walked her to her car we stopped and chatted a bit. Our body languages were open. There was some tension there. Good tension. We hugged good night. Agreed to do something on Saturday when she gets off of work. Texted me, said she a wonderful evening.

 

She monopolised most of the conversation. Not a whole lot of flirting. Really good eye contact. Buy the end of the evening we were leaning in toward each other. Our hands were on the table and close to touching. She seems more intent on just going out and having fun and seems ambivalent to actually finding a mate. Yet some of her conversation and behaviour seem to suggest otherwise.

 

She seemed to mention previous dates too easily. That usually means impending friend zone. But we'll see.

 

What else. She's very intelligent and educated. We are in roughly the same financial demographic. She's very cute and has a killer bod. Seems genuine and brags about her communication skills.

 

My sense is one more date then friend zone. I won't make it a self-fulfilling prophecy, but generally it has the hallmark feel of really liking me, but not terribly attracted to me. And it is kind of mutual. Beyond raw sex appeal I don't find her particularly engaging. We don't click romantically. At least not on this date. We'll see. I'm not optimistic or pessimistic.

 

Here it is almost four months later. We are still together.

 

I told her at around week three, I was going to marry her someday. She's not so sure I'm joking anymore. I'm not. And I will.

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YIPPPPPPEEEEE! I knew I started posting again this week for some reason.

 

I kept looking for updates.....hahahaha

 

We told ya, women like a man who they feel like 'friends' with....

You're feeling friendzoned, and they're thinking...I really like this guy. I'm comfortable.

Good going....by not sabotaging....lol

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Here it is almost four months later. We are still together.

 

I told her at around week three, I was going to marry her someday. She's not so sure I'm joking anymore. I'm not. And I will.

 

That is wonderful news. Keep us updated. It sounds great. We all get invited to the wedding, right. Lol j/k

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Here it is almost four months later. We are still together.

 

I told her at around week three, I was going to marry her someday. She's not so sure I'm joking anymore. I'm not. And I will.

 

Best update ever. I'm glad I saw it

 

Good luck to you- I'm sending all the good vibes your way.

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  • 2 weeks later...
  • 6 months later...

First, thanks everyone for the kind words and encouragement.

 

I tend to write less in my journals when things are going well. Things are still going well.

 

We will be together a year this July 27th. I am going to get down on my knee and propose. I'm excited and stressed. It's a big move. We have discussed. She's going to say yes. I just want to a formal romantic proposal. I'm not stressed because of doubt. I'm stressed because it's a major change in my life. We are making the arrangements for her to move in. That will happen likely in October. She's practically living with me now. We are both grieving our single lives. They're gone. On some level they will be missed. We do like to take breaks from one another, and have our space. Her schedule is all over the place. It works out well.

 

I'm going to propose where we had our third date. She says that's the one where she was hooked :) It's Peggy's Cove. It's a small village with an old lighthouse on a large rock. It's a well known attraction here. It's also very romantic. You could sit on large rocks and listen to the surf break against the rocks. We've been back a there a few times at sunset. She will see it coming. She will love it :)

 

We had a bit of a struggle over a ring. I wanted to get her one. She said we could put money to better use. I insisted. She conceded, but really didn't want it. Eventually she stood her ground and said it was causing her stress. I immediately dropped it. Had I know, been listening better, I wouldn't have insisted. I just wanted her to have a nice ring. Anyways she was wearing a nice ring Saturday. I said that looks like an engagement ring. She said it is. It was her Grandmother's. To make a long story short, that's going to be her engagement ring. She conveniently accidentally left laying around, and I conveniently put it in a safe spot for now.

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Sportster,

 

Your post makes me happy. I have presumed you are in a good place together because of your lack of posts --- still, your post has extra special news in it, and some fabulous bits. I love how she left her ring lying around, after slyly getting your approval of same. I love how you two communicated using verbal and non-verbal cues, and in doing so, respected each person's desire to give/receive a certain way.

 

I also love the "grieving our single lives" phrase. You two sound clear eyed, communicative, and committed. I love it.

 

I remember that date in the sweet town with the cafe etc. Fantastic.

 

May the wind be forever at your back, S.

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First, thanks everyone for the kind words and encouragement.

 

I tend to write less in my journals when things are going well. Things are still going well.

 

We will be together a year this July 27th. I am going to get down on my knee and propose. I'm excited and stressed. It's a big move. We have discussed. She's going to say yes. I just want to a formal romantic proposal. I'm not stressed because of doubt. I'm stressed because it's a major change in my life. We are making the arrangements for her to move in. That will happen likely in October. She's practically living with me now. We are both grieving our single lives. They're gone. On some level they will be missed. We do like to take breaks from one another, and have our space. Her schedule is all over the place. It works out well.

 

I'm going to propose where we had our third date. She says that's the one where she was hooked :) It's Peggy's Cove. It's a small village with an old lighthouse on a large rock. It's a well known attraction here. It's also very romantic. You could sit on large rocks and listen to the surf break against the rocks. We've been back a there a few times at sunset. She will see it coming. She will love it :)

 

We had a bit of a struggle over a ring. I wanted to get her one. She said we could put money to better use. I insisted. She conceded, but really didn't want it. Eventually she stood her ground and said it was causing her stress. I immediately dropped it. Had I know, been listening better, I wouldn't have insisted. I just wanted her to have a nice ring. Anyways she was wearing a nice ring Saturday. I said that looks like an engagement ring. She said it is. It was her Grandmother's. To make a long story short, that's going to be her engagement ring. She conveniently accidentally left laying around, and I conveniently put it in a safe spot for now.

 

Lovely news!!

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ahhhh....sweet! Did you ever think it was gonna happen?

 

Peggy's Cove...love. Was there with my mom in my early 20's. The tide was coming in and I was running all over the rock and my mom was yelling at me to come back! hahahaha. Always thought it would be a FANTASTIC place to be married. In fact....i even said that's where I'd wanna be married. But, 40 years later, doesn't look like that's gonna happen!!! lol

 

So glad that YOU are. And if able...post pics of the happy couple!

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Awesome news Sportster! Woohoo! Very happy for you! I love your proposal idea and spot, sounds just lovely.

 

I totally understand the grieving of your single lives. . . this is my biggest obstacle to ever dating again lol! But space is possible in every relationship.....you can do this! Good luck, best wishes, and I will happy to see the proposal and wedding pictures! (((HUGS)))

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Sportster, I had been purposely avoiding ENA for a long time, as I had felt like posting in my journal had become sort of a “negative feedback loop” for me (through no one’s fault but my own). While things have actually gotten a lot better for me (I’ve continued working on myself and my attitude, and while I’m still “mostly” single at the moment, life has seemed a lot easier), I remain hesitant to post anything here in my own journal anymore. I’ve just been trying to enjoy my own life and take things one day at a time and have minimized any comparisons to others.

 

Nevertheless, I have lurked around here from time to time. And I'm glad I did today because I got to see your post. I cannot tell you how this has actually physically warmed my heart. I'm not even exaggerating. I know you went through so much dating bullsh*t to get to where you are, and I just want to say, from the bottom of my heart - congratulations!!! I wish you and your soon-to-be fiancé the best of luck! :D

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Here it is almost four months later. We are still together.

 

I told her at around week three, I was going to marry her someday. She's not so sure I'm joking anymore. I'm not. And I will.

 

 

We will be together a year this July 27th. I am going to get down on my knee and propose.

 

Wow this has been quite an Odyssey hasn't it -- congrats! :D

 

Isn't it funny (interesting funny) how everything changes when we meet the right person?

 

For me too - so much so, that I (Ms. Commitment Phobe, lol) am contemplating marriage and even having a baby with the man I'm currently dating!

 

He also mentioned something about it very early on (within weeks), which of course went in one ear and out the other (due to my own fears), but now four months later, when he makes comments, it goes in one ear, and stays there!

 

It's been said that a man knows almost immediately (or fairly quickly) when a woman is "right" for him -- the "one" -- which I never believed in before, but do now!

 

And you're living proof!

 

Again congrats and please keep us posted on developments!

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Anyways she was wearing a nice ring Saturday. I said that looks like an engagement ring. She said it is. It was her Grandmother's. To make a long story short, that's going to be her engagement ring. She conveniently accidentally left laying around, and I conveniently put it in a safe spot for now.

 

Very cute. Congratulations :)

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Sportster,

 

Your post makes me happy. I have presumed you are in a good place together because of your lack of posts --- still, your post has extra special news in it, and some fabulous bits. I love how she left her ring lying around, after slyly getting your approval of same. I love how you two communicated using verbal and non-verbal cues, and in doing so, respected each person's desire to give/receive a certain way.

 

I also love the "grieving our single lives" phrase. You two sound clear eyed, communicative, and committed. I love it.

 

I remember that date in the sweet town with the cafe etc. Fantastic.

 

May the wind be forever at your back, S.

 

Hey IAmFCA,

 

Thanks. I just took a snoop to see how you are doing. Looks like love's fickle compass has found you too. :)

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