Stressing

[Patriot95]

SO me and my gf have been dating for a little over a year. I constantly feel like I'm doing all the work in the relationship. i.e. making her a priority rather than an option. I feel like she isn't doing the same to me. What do I do?

[gebaird]

Is she losing interest? Lazy? Trying to show her love in ways that you aren't feeling? Have you tried talking to her?

 

My advice for anyone in a dissatisfying relationship is simple: fix it or end it. If you can't live without those things she isn't doing, and she's not willing to start doing them, it might be time to walk away.

[JaggerJim]

I think a talk may be in order. There are obviously problems that need addressing.

 

I'd ask simple questions like "Do you love me? Do you still want to be in this relationship? Is something wrong? Is there something that I could be doing more?

 

And then I'd tell how I felt and what she could be doing more. And if we couldn't get to the bottom of it, well then we would have to decide to end it.

[Patriot95]

We are with each other almost everyday. I feel like by me being there is making her frustrated because she sees me so much. She has really never had the opportunity to miss me

[JaggerJim]

How about not seeing her everyday? Do you have any other hobbies/interests? Spending time 24/7 when your not sure how she even feels is not good.

[Wiseman2]

Agree. You need to scale things way back. This is suffocating and over-saturating. Maintain your own lives, interests, friends, etc.

I feel like by me being there is making her frustrated because she sees me so much.

[Patriot95]

so I should take some time to myself and let her do her own things. I feel like by me stepping back she will question if I lost interest or love for her

[Wiseman2]

Yes step back. You say she's the one taking you for granted /getting sick of you? Do not laser focus on someone or "make them a priority" at the expense of everything else, it's unhealthy and she's sensing that. It's stifling

 

Why do you see each other this much everyday? Don't you have work, school, sports, interests, hobbies, friends, family,etc?

SO me and my gf have been dating for a little over a year. I constantly feel like I'm doing all the work in the relationship. i.e. making her a priority rather than an option. I feel like she isn't doing the same to me. What do I do?

[Patriot95]

I work go to school and go to the gym religiously.

Im always the one to contact her no matter what. She gets mad when I don't

[Wiseman2]

Is she your boss/mother? Get some self-respect and stop being hen-pecked. What's the problem if you voluntarily smother her?

Im always the one to contact her no matter what. She gets mad when I don't

[JaggerJim]

Let her get mad. Say "I'm kinda busy at the moment, but if you want to contact me, contact me, you don't always have to sit back and wait for me"

 

Time to start standing up for yourself.

[Patriot95]

she's taking it as me being annoying.

[JaggerJim]

It sounds like she's got you whipped.

 

Ease back on the contact, start telling her your busy on certain days and can't hang out. She sounds bossy.

[Patriot95]

Guys this worked tremendously. Wow

[katrina1980]

Guys this worked tremendously. Wow

 

This contradicts your other thread (which you created today).

 

In the new thread, you said she told you she feels you have lost interest and are into another girl.

 

She's noticed a difference ever since I've limited contact and she is assuming that I lost interest in her. She said yesterday that she believe ms that I am talking to another girl because I haven't been in immediate contact like I always used to be

 

And, as such, has backed off herself. Or as you phrased it, playing "hard to get." Like it's a game. Instead of chasing you like you wanted.

 

So which is it?

[katrina1980]

I work go to school and go to the gym religiously.

Im always the one to contact her no matter what. She gets mad when I don't

 

First off, you have been initiating for a year, so she's become accustomed to that.

 

Any deviation from that is gonna throw her off a bit, cause her to become a bit insecure, that you are losing interest.

 

She gets mad cause she's confused and scared that you have lost interest. She actually told you this.

 

Anyway, getting mad is how some people express that fear.

 

Would you have preferred she not give a **** when you don't contact her?

 

And act like it's okay? No big deal?

 

How would that have made you feel?