He has alot of psycho exes?

[stephaniefinle]

I started dating this guy weeks ago. I have a bad history with dating. I just seem to always fall for the players and jerks.

 

I met this guy who Ive been seeing for over a month now and things seem to be going good. Hes a nice guy who actually seems like he's going to give me the love I know I deserve. I can be a bit superficial, but while he's not the "hottest" guy in my book, I love what he offers me. My goal is to settle down with a guy and that seems to be in his plans too. He seems like he genuinely cares about me. It's just...different from what I'm used to. Seems like a breath of fresh air. He has a a young daughter, and I have a young son. Our kids already get along great.

 

One thing rung a bell though. I recently went looking through his facebook pictures (like Im sure many people do when they start dating somebody new) and I was just looking at pictures of him from over the years... Well I saw that he posted in May 2016 a picture of spray-paint on his car and he said "Here we have yet another psycho ex to add to my laundry list of them. God only knows why I attract them"

 

Is this a red flag or a sign of future problems between us?

[mustlovedogs]

Red flag. Total red flag.

 

Some may have had a few screws loose before him. But to think he's blameless is naive. How did he contribute to these reactions?

[Person1001]

Big red flag. When I began dating my ex, he was always saying how nice it was to meet a normal girl, instead of the crazy chicks. Towards the break up he ended up calling me crazy when I began to demand respect from him. Be careful

[Jibralta]

Well I saw that he posted in May 2016 a picture of spray-paint on his car and he said "Here we have yet another psycho ex to add to my laundry list of them. God only knows why I attract them"

 

Is this a red flag or a sign of future problems between us?

 

Yup. Not justifying the spray paint, but people who disparage their exes are generally bad news.

 

Still not justifying the spray paint, but who vandalizes another person's car for no reason?

[Atlantis]

A list of psycho exes?

Sorry but he cannot be the angel who just happens to attract all the crazy. Plus it is a huge red flag when a guy disrespects his exes like that. Be careful

[HeartGoesOn]

One red flag that stands out front row and center is the potential emotional damage caused by introducing him to your child, after dating for a period of only one month.

 

Other than that, you're intuition is usually correct.

[Fun Boater 1]

Still not justifying the spray paint, but who vandalizes another person's car for no reason?

 

Crazy, unstable, and psychotic people of BOTH sexes would vandalize an ex's car for "no reason". That's who would.

 

Just come out and ask him to tell you the story behind that, and start asking him questions about his relationship past. You'll be able to tell much about his history by his answers, and more importantly, his attitude towards giving you those answers. I think it's a little too soon to jump to conclusions about him being "crazy" until you know more details. However, when reading this, the word "narcissist" did come to mind, but I think until you know much more about his relationship past, it's far too early to make that assumption. Proceed with caution and eyes open, and start asking questions.

[Cheetarah]

Yeah, it's a huge red flag. YUUUGE.

 

Most people do not have a trail of 'psycho exes', unless they have their own personal issues that continuously draw them to abusive personalities.

 

If someone spray painted your car and they were 'psycho' or unstable, would you be blaring it all over social media for all to see? I wouldn't. I'd be lying low.

 

Chances are, they're probably not all psycho. Unless he really does have a pattern of being in abusive relationships. Either way, it's not a good sign.

[leseine7]

I have always paid very close attention to how guys talk about their exes. And look, it's one thing to tell you privately that he genuinely believed she was a psychopath with a personality disorder that made her act like a crazy person, etc. It's something completely different to publicly assassinate his exes' characters. That's pretty much what he did there. And it's highly unlikely all of his exes were psycho. Someone who plays the victim is an enormous turn off in my book.

 

I legit dated a psycho. he had an actual personality disorder. When I describe him to my current boyfriend, I describe things he did. I don't just throw out there "oh yeah and my psycho ex." there is a definite distinction. In one scenario, you go through something and discover through that relationship that the person has some serious instability and isn't for you, so you move on and learn not to date that type of person. In the other, you refuse to deal with your part in dating/breaking up with someone (or multiple someones) and label them crazy for the rest of your life. \

 

The latter shows a serious lack of maturity and self-awareness and, above all, respect for the feelings involved.

[JaggerJim]

Maybe he just hadn't met the right woman. If you too get along, and he treats you good, just see how it goes.

 

But if it all goes south, don't spray paint his car.

[mustlovedogs]

I have a friend who has a string of batsh** exes. Breaking and entering, wrecking his cars, whatever. He complains about women BUT he brings it out in them. He likes high maintenance women which doesn't help. But then he doesn't give them the love and affection they want and borderline cheats (texts other girls flirtatiously).

 

They have problems, but he does too.

[kamurj]

Multiple accounts are not allowed. Thread closed.