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Love each other but can't be together right now ???


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Hi everybody I haven't been on here for a while.


I had a pretty crazy breakup a few years ago & definitely back on track now 😊


Just wanted to ask if anyone has been in a similar situation to this?


I'm still seeing my ex we have no issues with the chemistry/attraction. It's the situation. We live an hour drive from each other & the situation with our kids makes it difficult as well. They are our priority.


I've told her to go date & I get it if she meets someone & vice versa. She met a guy & dated him for 6months & it didn't work out. The whole time she would initiate contact with me. I caught up with her once in that time & said nothings going to happen between us if you're dating someone else.


I just have to accept it & I know it will hurt but we've talked about it many times. We love each other & want the best for each other. It's not like one of us is begging for us to give it another go.


I know I can let it go if I have to, I just don't think she can. She initiates contact 95% of the time & because I love her I always respond eventually...


Once again has anyone been in this revolving cycle?

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I know I can let it go if I have to, I just don't think she can. She initiates contact 95% of the time & because I love her I always respond eventually...


If you hadn't said "if I have to," I'd place higher odds on the chances of you two moving in different romantic directions. Is this situation working for you? If it is, then there's no need for immediate change. You and your ex are on good terms, you're doing the best you can for your kids, and you aren't in danger of falling back into toxic on again/off again cycles.


I don't think cycles like this are uncommon when there is a reason to stay in contact (kids, in this case). One or both of you may start dating new people in the future, but for now this is the arrangement you've got.


Certain people become habits for us, almost like they are hard-wired into our brains. It's like there's some kind of gravity that keeps drawing us to them. It works well when a relationship is good, but it can be pretty awful when the relationship is toxic. It sounds like your situation is somewhere in between. You may not be able to define it, but who says you have to? Just go with the flow and do what works for you. Stay flexible and focus on being a good father and friend.

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Hey thanks for the great response.


Firstly I should of explained myself better. We have kids to our exes. My kids & her kids don't gel & we both admit this.


The reason we stay in touch is our chemistry. We are like magnets when we are together. We could stay in the same room for a week.


The problem is everything else. Location & merging families is the major problem. I know we are on each other's minds 24/7. I've tried to break away however she always makes contact & I give in.


When I don't contact she dies t give up & I cave in & we are back to square one.


There is no correct answer to this. Maybe this is meant to be 😂😂😂 Yes we are going with the flow alright 😂😂😂

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  • 2 months later...
It's possible to have amazing chemistry and zero compatibility. But you are exes and trying to date others. Maybe it's time to stop being fwb and move on?



Yes you may be correct.


That's pretty much what we agreed to do this week. I have no idea whats going to happen in the future. I'm leaving it to fate

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