RodgerClyde723 Posted January 27, 2017 Share Posted January 27, 2017 I've known this single mother for 2 years & we started dating on the 2nd year and it had it's ups & downs but no matter what we stayed together threw all the love & pain we've been through we fought to stay together but once I started to realize I could barly help her financially & I can barly provide for myself & I told her 3 days before Christmas "I'm done dating but we can be friends" but here's the back story : keep in mind I gave her $200 for the car down payment that we were both gonna use & this was 4 days ago (before the 3 days before Christmas break up) she never texted me back once within in those days & so I used a different phone to call her & which it did work, so I said hello then she replied" saying my name & I answered because I thought you were my boss" & then that's when I just started to ask her how did the down payment go? & a bunch of other questions (because I was worried) & that's when I heard her break down (She's a young 18-21 single mother, living in her own place, she's very independent & is always in a lot of stress & doesn't even talk to her own mother) she said "I barly have money, I'm working day & nights to feed my daughter & the money was stolen.3days ago.." she never told me how, or why ?? & I was just glad to hear her voice & that her & the baby were alright. And she said I'll call you tomorrow, so another 3 days went by..no text, no response, no communication (I do maintain myself like within those 3 days I've only sent 1 text or call each day, I understand she's a single mom, so I always gave her space as much as I could) & so when I found myself that I stress way too much about it plus I have my family to worry about it as well. I felt like the right thing to do was to stop it or maybe put it on pause or something which I did do it but now she says "She hates my ing guts,"& from time to time I have flashbacks about us & her daughter & now it feels like it's 2x as hard to let go knowing she has a grudge against me & not knowing why? How come she just didn't say "Goodbye, I understand & I wish the best for you too" but instead I got a "I hate your ing guts text & please dont text me again." but tell this day she still never told me how it got stolen, she never wanted to talk about it & always tried avoiding it & felt embarrassed about it. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Wiseman2 Posted January 27, 2017 Share Posted January 27, 2017 Sorry to hear this. Why did you break up with her? Is she upset you are not helping her financially? Where's the kids' father and the rest of her family? Did she have a drug habit? I told her 3 days before Christmas "I'm done dating but we can be friends" I got a "I hate your ing guts text & please dont text me again." Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
gebaird Posted January 27, 2017 Share Posted January 27, 2017 "I'm done dating but we can be friends" Most people would not respond well to a text like this. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
evad1 Posted January 28, 2017 Share Posted January 28, 2017 I hope that wasn't all you said to her. You explained why right? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
RodgerClyde723 Posted January 28, 2017 Author Share Posted January 28, 2017 Sorry to hear this. Why did you break up with her? Is she upset you are not helping her financially? Where's the kids' father and the rest of her family? Did she have a drug habit? I broke up with her because I felt like Now isn't the time to be in a relationship like this, especially after losing 2 family members within 2 months in between due to cancer & leukemia, I felt like the right thing to do would to just be friends with her. The kids father is an abusive guy & funny to mention that because she told me he was coming over to see the baby on the 27th or 28th "supposedly" but when I gave her $200 it was on the 18th or 20th. No drugs, & with all the stress she goes thru im surprised she doesn't smoke. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
RodgerClyde723 Posted January 28, 2017 Author Share Posted January 28, 2017 Yeah I explained why & on that day she understood but after 2 weeks went by after me texting her Merry Christmas & happy new years she never replied but 1 night which is the night she told she hate my guts was the time I texted her assuming she already left & didn't say goodbye so I did & said goodbye then that's when she replied after those 2 weeks saying she hates me Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
evad1 Posted January 28, 2017 Share Posted January 28, 2017 Yeah I explained why & on that day she understood but after 2 weeks went by after me texting her Merry Christmas & happy new years she never replied but 1 night which is the night she told she hate my guts was the time I texted her assuming she already left & didn't say goodbye so I did & said goodbye then that's when she replied after those 2 weeks saying she hates me Maybe she felt like you left her hanging. Unfortunately you can't do much about that. It really just sounds like she has a lot going on and she's kind of wrapped up in what's going on in her life and not really worried about your feelings. It's a good thing you worry about her and her kid from time to time. Shows you have a little humanity but maybe that's best left in the past if you don't plan on getting involved again. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
RodgerClyde723 Posted January 28, 2017 Author Share Posted January 28, 2017 I kind of do want to be with her if not in a relationship then as friends because we still had a solid friendship but you're right she doesn't have time to care my feelings but most importantly care for her daughters & her self which I understand? So should I leave her alone & wait till she/I reach out to me/her or just leave it ? Because My career is Pro Boxing & now it's going somewhere & I've been talking to this other girl we arnt dating but we do talk. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
evad1 Posted January 28, 2017 Share Posted January 28, 2017 I kind of do want to be with her if not in a relationship then as friends because we still had a solid friendship but you're right she doesn't have time to care my feelings but most importantly care for her daughters & her self which I understand? So should I leave her alone & wait till she/I reach out to me/her or just leave it ? Because My career is Pro Boxing & now it's going somewhere & I've been talking to this other girl we arnt dating but we do talk. Yea I think that's the best thing to do. Just leave it alone and if she reaches out to you one day that's awesome. Only so much you can do with that situation. You did all you could do. Especially if you're talking to someone currently. If you haven't you can tell her how you feel about the situation. Pour your heart out one more time so you can move on. Your intentions are good but sometimes it just doesn't work out. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Iggy5129 Posted January 28, 2017 Share Posted January 28, 2017 You dumped her, that's why she didn't reply. And since you kept contacting her after breaking up she got fed up and texted you mean things so you would leave her alone. It's really not that confusing. Usually when people get dumped they aren't interested in being friends with the person that just broke up with them. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
evad1 Posted January 28, 2017 Share Posted January 28, 2017 You dumped her, that's why she didn't reply. And since you kept contacting her after breaking up she got fed up and texted you mean things so you would leave her alone. It's really not that confusing. Usually when people get dumped they aren't interested in being friends with the person that just broke up with them. Well that too but she could have let him know. That's why I said she's not really worried about anyone feelings but her own. She's under a lot pressure so we understand. Say your piece and then move on. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Wiseman2 Posted January 28, 2017 Share Posted January 28, 2017 She needs welfare, child support and the court system to help her, not a romance.The kids father is coming over to see the baby on the 27th or 28th "supposedly" but when I gave her $200 it was on the 18th or 20th. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
RodgerClyde723 Posted January 28, 2017 Author Share Posted January 28, 2017 Thank you everyone & it's been 3 weeks since I last made contact with her or anything & I continue to do so especially after hearing all of this. Yall are right & I appreciate all of your help. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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