Advice

[Samuel2891]

So me and my wife have been togther for 5 years but only been married for a couple months we have tworked children.. we got into a fight the other day I said I was going to harm my self and she went and got order of protection on me sense then I'm aloud to speak to her just not go to our home or see her physcally.. OK the apartment we rent is 720 a month and utilitys. Sense I can't be there by law. We came up with agreement I make plenty of money to pay her 850 a month plus pay for another place to stay for me like rent a room.from someone.. im doing may part like she wants me to I got money orders to prove it... and a txt from her saying if you give me 850 a month I will figure everything else out on my own. Ok so I gave her the money and she come to me today and says she need more money the kids need clothes and food.. like I thought we agreeded on something u said I would work... by the way I was the sole provider for the apartment I am the one with the income.. she has no job but she can get one Fer sure.... I want to go home and have a place to live and not spend money on some room for me when I have a good home with them... but she will not drop the order of protection on me and divorce will not happen fast enough for her to save the apartment etc... so should I let her dig her self out of this mess on her own see what she is going to do. Or should I give her more money break me so I have barley any money to get to work and eat and ... we ate seprateded.... I asked to go home plenty of time she says no not right now.. so I'm at the point where ok u want to be like this I'll do my part like u asked me for she said she will do her part.. where is all my money going if my money going for the kids and bills etc why u asking for me if you can so your part like you stated to me u can.... I hope u understand where im.comeing from I'm going to take care of my kids no matter what but sense she wants to be single and have other guys I should not have to support her in anyway shape or for and the 850 a month is what child support would be. With out deduction from what I pay for my children and her medical dental vision etc.. help.me plz

[j.man]

If it's over, file for divorce and get court ordered child support. You're playing with fire paying her under the table. Courts can and likely would not count the payments and have you pay backpay. Speak with a divorce lawyer. They could offer better advice than us.

[Samuel2891]

Ya a divorce lawyer could but I don't have the money for that.. neither does she. She broker then me but back pay for what I'm taking care of my kids... were not divorced yet and I'm giveing money for her to take care of the kids just not her self... I'm not going to hand over my whole pay cheak to pay for the home utilities etc when we're both on the lease and she said she can do her part and I can't live there I don't think that is right what do ever...

[RainyCoast]

go see a social worker to mediate an arrangement.

[lostandhurt]

Mediation is cheaper than getting a lawyer. Go to the county website where you got married and there will be a frequently asked questions page. There is your starting point.

Many law schools offer mediation for free so look into it. If nothing else you need to file for legal separation right away.

 

Lost

[Wiseman2]

Sorry to hear this. You need a lawyer to discuss divorce options and child support custody, etc. Going back is not an option, you'll get arrested.

we got into a fight the other day I said I was going to harm my self and she went and got order of protection on me. I want to go home and have a place to live and not spend money on some room ... but she will not drop the order of protection on me.... I asked to go home plenty of time she says no not right now.. the 850 a month is what child support would be. With out deduction from what I pay for my children and her medical dental vision etc..