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Does anyone here have a happy ending?

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Hey guys.

I recently went through a break up (4 days ago) with my ex who i was with for almost 3 years (our 3 year anniversary is in less than a month). I was 17 when we first started dating, and he was 19, so we grew up together. I graduated high school, i started college, he graduated college, turning 18, him turning 21, we were there for huge self-evolving milestones. And I have been told im so young and i'll find someone but the issue with being this young is that my identity was basically created WITH him, so its really hard for me to move in because a lot of myself was evolved with the help of him being there. Backstory is that he recently got a job where he works 12 hours a day and we had broken up twice before but this time he had told me he cant be in a relationship and he needs to focus on himself (the other time he had broken up with me was basically because he was stressed, he cannot handle stress AT ALL).

So i was just wondering if any of you have any happy stories of how you are okay right now? It helps reading advice but it helps even more knowing people survived! Thank you guys, how incredible is this forum?



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I went through something similar at your age, but I was able to rise from the ashes of my grief and meet someone new and wonderful, who I've been with for the past twenty years. I remember thinking I would never love someone as much as I loved my high school sweetheart, but fortunately I was wrong.

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I've been married to the same guy for a lot longer than you've been alive! Of course we have had our ups and downs but that's life. As you grow up and mature, your life changes, and more importantly you change as you find yourself. You can certainly survive not being with this guy. You are so young, whether or not you want to hear that or believe it, but you are. Give yourself time to get yourself together. You learn how to be you, not dependent or intertwined with anyone permanently at your age.

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Yes. I've had a few failed romances including a really toxic six-year on/off one that just about drove me around the bend. And I'm here to tell you proudly that I survived every single heartbreak, went on to lead a very full and happy and productive life, and in my 50s met my current husband. We've been married three years, four? I'm hazy on that, sorry. And I'm really happy, it's my best relationship because he's sane and normal and just a generally great guy.


I don't want to say it's a happy ending though, because nothing is ever an ending. I'm married happily right now and that's enough. And I've recovered enough times from loss and heartache to know if he leaves me tomorrow under any circumstances I still have a lot of friends, family, a support network and more than a few animals relying on my getting up in the morning to help them and be there for them. In short, losing him would hurt a lot, but it wouldn't end me. Nothing will until the day the Reaper comes for me and even then I'm not sure that's the end. Maybe a new beginning? A new adventure or just eternal rest, who knows? I'm not going to worry about that now.


But did I get over every person that ever broke my heart? Yes, and I went on to love again, because love isn't a finite quantity and there are a lot of different types of love out there. I can also look back on my life and at what I'm doing now and I'm really satisfied with everything going on in it, not just my love life which is only one part of the overall picture. And I think that's the trick to such things, don't be so locked into "This is the only thing/person that can make me happy," because really humans are built for multitaskign and you should have a lot of things going on for you in your life, not just one thing.


But this is the best relationship of my life, because I'm sane (well as much as I can be anyways) and normal and consistent in my love and so is he. There's no drama, no red flags, nothing but just "we go well together and we get along well and life is good as a team." And that's how it should be and I wish I'd known that when I was young.

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I have had my share of heartbreak. I was in a decade long relationship from 22-32. Then I talked online for a year after to a guy that really was nothing more then a friend until I realized how much of a jerk he is and cut him out of my life. Now I'm meeting someone even though I wanted to take time for myself I caved and went on a dating site. I'm meeting him in two weeks due to busy schedules. So far I enjoy him. 😊


there is someone better out there for you, don't lose hope!

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Am in my 40's... have 4 kids.. and 2 ex's ( whom I had the 4 with)--- over the last 25 yrs.

And another long term relation- 5 yrs...ended cause he cheated.


Have been on my own... attempting on occasion to date again.

Success? Not really. Just short term ones over the last 5 yrs. Longest was 5 months.


Thing is.. it can be a little more difficult when older.. and many my age are already set in their ways of life.


My son, who met a very nice gal, over 2 yrs ago- is starting fresh in his life and moving along at a good rate


So... believe that you will too! Just because this didn't work, doesn't mean all will.

I see you're still young. Never give up.


Give it time.. work on healing and use this as a learning experience.

Alll I have to say is NEVER feel you have to 'give in' to feel important or loved. That all takes time...

And come to see If or when you're being taken advantage of, or any forms of mis-treatment.


We all want good in our lives. So dont settle for anything less! You deserve someone good!

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