Lotusavx Posted January 11, 2017 Share Posted January 11, 2017 I have been with my boyfriend for 2 months. So far we have a good relationship, no major issues and really enjoy each others company and get along great. He is 2 years older than me and has a 2 year old daughter, and a 5 year old son. The daughter is his, but his son is from his ex's previous relationship and the real father is not in the picture, so he kind of just unofficially took him on as his own. Though I have never dated anyone with children, I have no problem at all that his children will come first and I understand that I will be coming second. He is very good friends with his ex since they share children and are always in contact. He speaks very highly of her, which is understandable. I have asked him a few times to explain it to me because I don't quite understand it: he says that he never loved his ex, and was very confused with the whole relationship. It was her idea to have the child. I am asking him how does he not love her after having a child with her? He says that he never really loved her, and he moved from her and his kids because he didn't want to give his kids the wrong idea and have them grow up around a ''false love'' between him and his ex. I am confused as to why he stayed with his ex for over 2 years and shares children and apparently never loved her. So it worries me because what if hes stays with me but never loves me like with her. I know there is no comparison, but how can he not love a woman he had a child with? Wouldn't there be a special bond regarded as love? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ms Darcy Posted January 11, 2017 Share Posted January 11, 2017 I think you are overthinking and creating something to worry about. Just enjoy getting to know him. It's only been two months. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Wiseman2 Posted January 11, 2017 Share Posted January 11, 2017 Focus on your relationship and not his previous one. Make sure he's not stringing you along if he has a habit of having kids with women he claims he "never loved". Is he on the rebound? Are they trying to reconcile? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lotusavx Posted January 11, 2017 Author Share Posted January 11, 2017 As far as I know he isn't on the rebound and he assured me that he will never regain feelings for her, as that was one of my concerns. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
katrina1980 Posted January 11, 2017 Share Posted January 11, 2017 I am confused as to why he stayed with his ex for over 2 years and shares children and apparently never loved her. So it worries me because what if hes stays with me but never loves me like with her. I know there is no comparison, but how can he not love a woman he had a child with? Wouldn't there be a special bond regarded as love? Sweetie, my very own dad stayed with my mom for 15 years, had six kids, and NEVER loved her. He married her because he wanted to be a lawyer and HER dad was a reputable judge who could open doors for him. They got along fine, raised all of us kids, but eventually divorced her and married the woman he had been in love with since college, after HER husband died. Who also happened to be my dad's friend! People marry others for all sorts of reasons that have nothing to do with love, try to not over analyze it. Doesn't mean he will never love another woman or even you! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lotusavx Posted January 11, 2017 Author Share Posted January 11, 2017 thanks very much Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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