Long term relationship break up with peculiarity

[peterspain]

Hi everyone i am new here, i apologise in advance if this topic has already been covered. I did have a look around but i didn't see anything really related so i thought i'd post this and see if anyone has any advice or maybe tell me what i am not seeing or anything at all.

 

roughly around 6 weeks ago my ex girlfriend told me she doesn't want to speak to me because she found it confusing since we weren't together. Back story: We had previously been together for around 7 years, we decided to move in together around 2 years ago. We had an argument last year (March 2016) where she left our place and went to stay with her parents. After doing this she told me she didn't want to live with me any more, so i thought i would let her keep the place and i would find somewhere else to stay. So i left. Since i was still in love with her i try to communicate with her and all she does is get her friend to tell me not to speak to her and to move on because she is moving on, so i leave her alone for a couple of months and concentrate on myself. Then she gets in contact and we speak off and on for a couple of months (july/august). Another couple of months pass (with limited or no contact at all), and we start talking a lot more and started seeing each other a lot (without ever stating what we were doing). We started having sex again and meeting up once or twice a week (work permitting)(october/november). Then around 6 weeks ago (end of november/start of december) she says to me she doesn't want to speak or see each other at the moment because she finds it confusing since we weren't together. So i try to speak to her a few times and there is no reply, christmas and new year happens and i think to myself well its been a month, maybe me and her could talk and see where we stand. I come to find out she has blocked me on most social media sites and has deleted my number (which she didn't do before, she only deleted my number). I try to call and i get no reply, i messaged her the other day and her friend messages me back saying she doesn't want to speak to me and has moved on and that i should too.

 

I am absolutely confused by this, maybe the answer is starring me in the face, maybe its hidden in between the lines, i don't know. The one thing i do know is i'm still deeply in love with her and still have thoughts and dreams that we could give the relationship another go. I thought she just needed space and i thought i was reading in between the lines by giving her that and now she completely closes me out and tells her friend (who went through a 5+ year long term relationship break up and found someone else within a month or two who she now has been dating for the last 4 years!!, i could be reading too much into it but i hope she isn't planning on achieving something similar! that would rip me to shreds), To tell me to move on and that she has moved on when less than 6 weeks ago we were spending a lot of time together talking about how we both missed living together and then bang! nothing and the message that its confusing and now telling me to move on.

 

Anyway if anyone could let me know what i might be missing or how i could go about trying to get her back (i really want her back), or maybe if i should just give up and pray she comes back to me. Right now i don't know what to do and its actually turning into heartache, i never knew why they called it heartbreak until this happened.

 

Peter

[Clio]

What are your ages and why did you two break up? What was the argument about? It sounds like the reasons that led to the break up were never addressed/ fixed so she finaly decided to move on.

[peterspain]

Hi thanks for the reply.

 

Were both 27 and we first broke up because of a silly argument over whether or not i had seen her laptop since she thought she had lost it. I told her where i had last seen it, then she turned around and said that i didn't tell her, so then i showed her where it was and she started having a go at me. So i just ignored her and continued watching tv and then she turned off the tv and i was like what did you do that for and then the argument ensued.

 

Do you think there is any chance i could get back with her? i've broken the no contact rule three times now, its super difficult to do but after the last time i haven't contacted her. Its only been a few days but i am determined to stick to it now.

 

Also how long do you think i should not contact her for, i don't wanna leave it too long and she finds someone else and its all over for me.