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Hi everyone all help is appreciated !


I am in a relationship with a pretty good guy.

We have been together for two months now.


He broke up with his ex 8 or 9 months ago.

He told me he wanted to marry her and that he loved her but his family hated her and eventually that tore them apart. He tried to get back together with her but she refused.


I was sceptic into having something with him but he kept on insisting.


I am still a virgin and don't want to have sex yet until I know he's the one. The reason I'm still a virgin is because I haven't been with many guys and also due to our culture.


Allthough we can't have sex we do other things mostly kissing and rubbing his private parts.


I have had one boyfriend before him and during foreplay my previous boyfriend would get hard and stay hard until he ejaculated (no sex).


I find this guy (my boyfriend now) gets hard and like 30sec later gets soft and then gets hard again (while I'm rubbing his private parts) and goes back to going soft. If I stop touching him for a second he goes all soft. The only way he can ejaculate is if he countiously masturbates by his own hand not mine while we kiss and he touches me at the same time. Thats the only way he stays hard is if he only does it with his own hand and at the same time by touching me with the other.


I find it kind of strange. If he rubs his penis against me (my private part) not actually enter inside he doesn't seem to be that hard. His erection is like a roaller coaster.


And I know it's not that he's not attracted to me. I know he finds me really attractive. He told me so and I can tell.


My concern is if he can't get as hard how are we ever going to have real sex once we decide to, if he has this much trouble staying hard during foreplay?! He's 32 years old..


My other question is...maybe this condition of his has to do with him having a very hard break up with the person he was so much in love with and wanted to marry?


Thank you for your help!

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It could be a psychological issue in that he wants you but knows he can't go all the way with you and have you completely. A kind of rejection every time the two of you are intimate. Perhaps that coupled with his recent breakup and rejection making him emotionally and intimately unavailable.

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