Tombarratt10 Posted January 4, 2017 Share Posted January 4, 2017 Hello I'm Tom and 19 years old. I'm really not sure if this will help me but I need someone to help me find my ex girlfriend who I've been in deep love with ever since 2015. It's very distressing for me because I was in a relationship before and we've always had these feelings for each other even if we haven't been trying to get back into a relationship. And also, me and her have never met in person before. She's 18 I think now and I just really want to meet her. She means so much to me! All I want is to find out if she's actually the person I have been talking to from September 2015 and onwards. I just need help with trying to get in contact with her again. I've tried searching for websites that could help me with finding the identity of her, etc without making it creepy because of my suspicions about her at the moment. Hope someone can help me! Thanks Link to comment
Wiseman2 Posted January 4, 2017 Share Posted January 4, 2017 Why did she stop talking to you? Do you think it's a scammer or a catfish?She's 18 I think now and I just really want to meet her.All I want is to find out if she's actually the person I have been talking to from September 2015 and onwards. Link to comment
Tombarratt10 Posted January 4, 2017 Author Share Posted January 4, 2017 Well, it's not that I think either of those things. Because I really don't want to. She seems real and I'm convinced by that by looking at her profile and she doesn't ask for money of me or silly things that someone who's catfishing would do. But I just have big suspicions about her which I just can't help having at the moment. But if I had any thoughts of her not being a genuine person I'd say it looks like a catfish. I mean, she barely goes on Facebook at all and I still don't have her phone number because she's always said she's broken her phone and has been unable to buy a new one because she's busy or whatever the reason is. Link to comment
Wiseman2 Posted January 4, 2017 Share Posted January 4, 2017 Why obsess over someone you've never met and only looked at profile pics of? Stop investing in fake internet "people". If you have dating apps why not date locally and meet girls in person? Link to comment
Tombarratt10 Posted January 4, 2017 Author Share Posted January 4, 2017 Thing is, it's not the way you think it might be. Some people in this world have relationships like I have with this girl and would honestly die to meet her or him. Or otherwise it can have a huge affect on someone's emotions and feelings. This has happened to me. I've been left wondering if I'll ever get to see her because she expresses feelings for me and so do I for her! And it's been like that for over a year now. I can't just let her go Link to comment
Wiseman2 Posted January 4, 2017 Share Posted January 4, 2017 Then why isn't she hoping on a plane and running to meet you in person? Why do you go after fantasy relationships? This is the most important thing to ask yourself, not "where is she"?I have with this girl and would honestly die to meet her or him. I've been left wondering if I'll ever get to see her because she expresses feelings for me and so do I for her! And it's been like that for over a year now. Link to comment
Tombarratt10 Posted January 4, 2017 Author Share Posted January 4, 2017 She lives in Manchester.. I went to meet her not long ago but she didn't turn up but told me the reason why. And it wasn't because she didn't want to see me. She also works a lot I think since that's what she's told me. She's told me a while ago her parents have passed away so she's living on her own and in a way I can see she might have a busy life! You never know about some people you know! Link to comment
Wiseman2 Posted January 4, 2017 Share Posted January 4, 2017 Please tell you parents or a trusted adult about this catfishing scam where they have excuses not to meet. By the way, you don't "know her" she refuses to meet you. Link to comment
Iggy5129 Posted January 4, 2017 Share Posted January 4, 2017 Have you seen the show catfish? Because everything you're saying sounds like one. What 19 year old girl is too busy to get a new phone?? Come on everyone pretty much needs a phone these days. You're wasting your time. Link to comment
Tombarratt10 Posted January 4, 2017 Author Share Posted January 4, 2017 Yeh I have seen that catfish programme. And I get it may sound like she's a catfish but I honestly don't believe that at the moment. I'm just have some suspicions! I've even tried contacting them and I've tried ringing Jeremy Kyle's team, etc! But I'm not getting any luck. I just feel so attached to her and it feels like I'll never let her go! All I want is answers from someone who can't help me find out her identity! I've been waiting for so long now and it's not making me happy Link to comment
No1 Posted January 6, 2017 Share Posted January 6, 2017 Stalker alert! Youve been catfished. Plain and simple. Weather you want to believe it or not is up to you. Link to comment
katrina1980 Posted January 10, 2017 Share Posted January 10, 2017 I just feel so attached to her and it feels like I'll never let her go! All I want is answers from someone who can't help me find out her identity! I've been waiting for so long now and it's not making me happy First off, I would like to say that I do understand your feelings, and how you could become so attached to someone you have never met, never spoken to (on phone), never even seen in person. Someone who doesn't show up for your intended meet, refuses to give phone number etc. Often times these types of RLs are even more intense than "in person" RLs because they are fantasy driven instead of reality driven. And fantasies are always way more exciting and compelling than reality. You are left with so many questions, so many "blanks" that you proceed to fill in yourself with YOUR version of who this person is, what's she like, etc. It is REAL important to stay grounded though.... in REALITY, although I realize this is difficult to do sometimes. BTDT! It's hard for us older folks, I can only imagine what it must be like for a young man such as yourself. I know this seems VERY real for you, and yes your feelings ARE real, but this "connection" you believe you have, is NOT real, not by a long shot. It couldn't possibly be for reasons stated above. You are going to deny this but you are essentially "in love" with a FANTASY. DESPITE what she "tells" you, you have NO idea who this person is, if what she/he (and yes "she" could be a "he") is telling you is the truth, what she/he is feeling, so you fill in the blanks. Blanks are NOT reality, pls remember that. Frankly I think you are wasting your time trying to find "her" or find out her "identity" as I suspect "she" doesn't even exist, not the way you think she does. When you get older, this will ALL make much more sense, but for now, try to extricate yourself from this crazy FANTASY and any idea that the two of you are "in love" and are meant to be together or whatever else you're thinking. It's NOT real, none of it. You are the victim of your own imagination here. I'm sorry but best to try to move on and focus more on reality-based relationships. I am not saying stay away from on-line, but if you do choose that route, if you cannot meet for awhile, use Skype and phone to actually talk live, make plans to meet ASAP, and if she refuses to do any of these things, and/or gives a bunch of excuses why she cannot do any of these things, then something is OFF and it's NEXT. Be smart about it. Good luck. Link to comment
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