Understanding a weird situation

[lostsoul85]

I have met a girl one day thru some of my friends 3 weeks ago and because the friends told me that she would be interested in me I got in contact with her.

The day we exchanged phone numbers she chatted me on Whatsapp that night with small talk. After 2 days of short chats (I hate texting, chatting, etc) I asked her out and she said yes instantly, but she couldn't tell me an exact day because she was working late that week. Next day she chatted me again and after some small talk I ask about the date. She now gave me a day (day after next).

Because she worked until 23:00 I asked her a few hours earlier when exactly to meet. She wrote me that she has to cancel because at her 2nd job something came up and to postpone for the next day (her suggestion).

Next day, few hours before 23:00 I asked again when exactly to meet. Again, she canceled with the reason that whatever she had to do at her 2nd job the previous knight went deep into the night and got home very early (5:00) and she is super tired.

Next day was my bday and I invited her to my place where I had a gathering with friends planned since a few weeks. She instantly said yes and she did show up. We talked and laughed but it was a party where I was the host so no private time.

For NYE a common friend had a party who invited us both. We knew that both of us will go there. The night after my bday party I walked her to the cab and on the way she asked me if I would like to go with her together to NYE. Of course I accepted. At first it was planned to go by cab, but I wanted to drive there with my car and to pick her up. I asked her if this was OK and without a doubt she accepted. Before continuing the story I would like to share the fact that a very close friend of hers passed away 2 months ago. On NYE I wanted to bring my best game to impress her so I dressed sharp (I usually don't do that) and tried to offer her all my attention. However she was somehow kinda distant. We did talk, but I did not feel that she is interested in me. But she was almost the same with other people there as well, some that she did know. She also told me at some point that she will not stay to long because she wants to visit some other friends. Few hours after midnight I left because I felt nothing will come out of this "date". Next day I chatted with her a bit mostly trying to find out why she was distant. She did not give me an exact reason but kept saying that she enjoyed the time at my party and also at NYE party. Again I used the opportunity to ask her on a date. She said YES fast but again told me that because she is busy she cannot tell me an exact day, but probably in the coming weekend and that she will contact me when she has time.

A friend of ours who knows her for a longer time told me that she is very upset because of the friend that passed away. There are currently no other guys chasing her, she definitely has no boyfriend and I was again told that she is interested in me.

I am so confused right now and have no clue what to do, haven't talked in 2 days. I, for one, have a feeling that she is mocking me.

Any advise is highly appreciated.

[Andrina]

She knows you're interested after all of the dates you asked her on. The ball is in her court now. I would not contact her at all, since she hasn't given you any signs she's into you. It could be that she's the cowardly type and will accept all dates even if she doesn't want to go on them, and then weasels out of them with stories. Just leave her alone. If she's interested, she'll let you know when she's free. If she does call and you go out and she's distant, I'd say why do you want to continue with someone like this?

[Wiseman2]

Ask her for a one-on-one date not parties or group style dates. Contact her Wed. (not before or again) and ask which day she wants to go have dinner (not a party or a group hang-out). If she is "too busy" again, lose her number.

She said YES fast but again told me that because she is busy she cannot tell me an exact day, but probably in the coming weekend and that she will contact me when she has time.

[lostsoul85]

All 3 times I asked her out I was very specific about being a one-on-one date. The birthday thing invitation was more a test, i was curious if she is willing to go to a strangers house and NYE was planned for me at least since some time.

I cannot contact her tomorrow and ask about the day when she specifically told me on Sunday, when we talked, that she cannot make it this week, but probably on the weekend, but she will let me know exactly when.

[Wiseman2]

So you have no way to contact her and confirm plans for the weekend and on what specific day time and place?...that's weird, no? Why are you not allowed to contact her and confirm a date?

I cannot contact her tomorrow and ask about the day when she specifically told me on Sunday, when we talked,but probably on the weekend.

[lostsoul85]

Oh I can contact her anytime, i have her number, we talked over whatsapp. I just thought that if she wrote me that she will get back to me when she knows she is free I should now wait a bit to see if that happenes. I could of course do what you recommend.