rosereji Posted January 2, 2017 Share Posted January 2, 2017 So there's this guy friend of mine who's super sweet and nice, but he's like way too nice to me. I told him that I just got out of a relationship and need time to heal and be happy on my own, but he says he wants to help me to be happy and do nice things for me. Idk how I feel...like what should I tell him? Link to comment
JaggerJim Posted January 2, 2017 Share Posted January 2, 2017 He's doing these things to get with you. Nip it in the bud right now. Tell him "Thanks, but I don't feel that way about you". Make it clear your not interested. It's his problem if he takes this news to heart. Link to comment
boltnrun Posted January 2, 2017 Share Posted January 2, 2017 Judging by the 5 or so threads you posted about your ex in the past couple of days, I'd say you're nowhere near ready to even consider dating or seeing anyone. If he insists, he does not respect or care for your feelings. Why would you want to start something with someone who disregards your wishes? Link to comment
rosereji Posted January 2, 2017 Author Share Posted January 2, 2017 He's doing these things to get with you. Nip it in the bud right now. Tell him "Thanks, but I don't feel that way about you". Make it clear your not interested. It's his problem if he takes this news to heart. Yeah I wouldn't want to lead him on...but he's not into me like that...he just wants to be there for me as a friend...but I just feel like he's being too nice... Link to comment
rosereji Posted January 2, 2017 Author Share Posted January 2, 2017 Judging by the 5 or so threads you posted about your ex in the past couple of days, I'd say you're nowhere near ready to even consider dating or seeing anyone. If he insists, he does not respect or care for your feelings. Why would you want to start something with someone who disregards your wishes? I don't want to date him...I told him that I need time to be happy on my own, but I guess he doesn't understand that. I'm assuming he's like this towards everyone? But who knows. I know I'm not ready for a relationship. I don't mind being friends with him but he's just too nice... .-. Link to comment
Jeffbobo Posted January 2, 2017 Share Posted January 2, 2017 Yeah I wouldn't want to lead him on...but he's not into me like that...he just wants to be there for me as a friend...but I just feel like he's being too nice... Geez... He's a wolf in sheeps clothing. Link to comment
rosereji Posted January 2, 2017 Author Share Posted January 2, 2017 Geez... He's a wolf in sheeps clothing. Lol I had to look up that saying cause I never heard of it before...idk..it's really weird that he wants to do all this stuff for me. Link to comment
JaggerJim Posted January 2, 2017 Share Posted January 2, 2017 I don't want to date him...I told him that I need time to be happy on my own, but I guess he doesn't understand that. I'm assuming he's like this towards everyone? But who knows. I know I'm not ready for a relationship. I don't mind being friends with him but he's just too nice... .-. YEAH RIGHT!!!!! No-one is that nice without angling for something. Link to comment
rosereji Posted January 2, 2017 Author Share Posted January 2, 2017 YEAH RIGHT!!!!! No-one is that nice without angling for something. So do I just tell him that, we should be just friends and that he doesn't need to do all these things for me? Link to comment
JaggerJim Posted January 2, 2017 Share Posted January 2, 2017 Yes. He's probably on message boards asking the public how he can go about getting his dream girl to fall for him, and out of the friend-zone. If you don't think he's keen on you, your dreaming. Make it clear and concise with no room for "maybe's". Link to comment
Jeffbobo Posted January 3, 2017 Share Posted January 3, 2017 Lol I had to look up that saying cause I never heard of it before...idk..it's really weird that he wants to do all this stuff for me. Hopefully you get it. Or... Fast forward a few months to a thread that you'll be creating that will say, "I don't know what happened... He was really sweet and nice, then I slept with him and now he's gone cold on me: won't return my calls or text." Link to comment
rosereji Posted January 3, 2017 Author Share Posted January 3, 2017 Hopefully you get it. Or... Fast forward a few months to a thread that you'll be creating that will say, "I don't know what happened... He was really sweet and nice, then I slept with him and now he's gone cold on me: won't return my calls or text." I feel like you guys are judging him too quick...it's not like you guys have met him... Link to comment
boltnrun Posted January 3, 2017 Share Posted January 3, 2017 I get it, the attention feels good, especially since you are distraught over your breakup. But don't make the mistake of jumping right into another relationship just so you won't be "alone". Trust me, this guy is trying to swoop in while you're vulnerable. Insisting on "being nice" is him not respecting your wishes or your feelings. Politely explain that you're not in the right mind frame to be spending time with another guy just yet. And if he tries to bulldoze over you, speak a bit firmer but do not give in. Otherwise, the next thread will be about how you found yourself in a relationship with a guy you don't really love and who doesn't compare in the slightest with your ex. Link to comment
HeartGoesOn Posted January 3, 2017 Share Posted January 3, 2017 He wants to jump while the irons hot. Look that one up! Link to comment
rosereji Posted January 3, 2017 Author Share Posted January 3, 2017 Okay...well like I said..I'm not gonna get involved with him. Link to comment
JaggerJim Posted January 3, 2017 Share Posted January 3, 2017 Well if you could just answer the question of why your letting him do all this stuff for you, we would have a better understanding. Link to comment
rosereji Posted January 3, 2017 Author Share Posted January 3, 2017 Well if you could just answer the question of why your letting him do all this stuff for you, we would have a better understanding. I'm not? I haven't hung out with him or anything. I meant he's insisting on doing those nice things for me because he cares about me and would rather live life being kind to others than not being kind. He just wants to cheer me up. Link to comment
JaggerJim Posted January 3, 2017 Share Posted January 3, 2017 I'm not? I haven't hung out with him or anything. I meant he's insisting on doing those nice things for me because he cares about me and would rather live life being kind to others than not being kind. He just wants to cheer me up. I give up. I have no idea what your saying, or what you want. You talk double-dutch. Link to comment
rosereji Posted January 3, 2017 Author Share Posted January 3, 2017 I give up. I have no idea what your saying, or what you want. You talk double-dutch. He's only been talking to me through text... Link to comment
boltnrun Posted January 3, 2017 Share Posted January 3, 2017 He's doing nice things for you because he's hoping to be your next boyfriend. What are these "nice things", BTW? Is he buying you things? Taking you out to dinner? Link to comment
rosereji Posted January 3, 2017 Author Share Posted January 3, 2017 He's doing nice things for you because he's hoping to be your next boyfriend. What are these "nice things", BTW? Is he buying you things? Taking you out to dinner? Well I have hung out with him yet, but he's saying if we hang out, then he'd like to take me to a movie, or take me out to eat and stuff Link to comment
rosereji Posted January 3, 2017 Author Share Posted January 3, 2017 Well I have hung out with him yet, but he's saying if we hang out, then he'd like to take me to a movie, or take me out to eat and stuff Haven't hung out* stupid auto correct Link to comment
boltnrun Posted January 3, 2017 Share Posted January 3, 2017 Those are dates! He's trying to disguise dates as "being nice". And if you accept, he will believe you two are dating. Even if you tell him it's "as friends", he will convince himself that you wouldn't be spending time with him if you weren't interested in him. Remember, people read into actions more than words. Link to comment
HeartGoesOn Posted January 3, 2017 Share Posted January 3, 2017 I'm not? I haven't hung out with him or anything. I meant he's insisting on doing those nice things for me because he cares about me and would rather live life being kind to others than not being kind. He just wants to cheer me up. He knows you're in a vulnerable state of mind, and his silly/elaborate words simply translate to he wants to get in your pants. Either way, I have a hunch you're only going to believe what you want to believe... Link to comment
JaggerJim Posted January 3, 2017 Share Posted January 3, 2017 Ok I think I've got it! You are inadvertently leading him on (but your oblivious to it). And I'm trying to tell you to stop, for your own good!!!!! Link to comment
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