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Went to my first codependency meeting, learned a lot. Working on myself.

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I recently went to my first codependency meeting. I've been doing so much reflecting and self searching, and this whole experience has been a huge eye opener. From doing my own relationship inventory, and doing an inventory of past relationships I realize that I have a pattern that needs broken. I have self love that I need to work on, and I am way too dependent on other people for my own self satisfaction and self worth. At the meeting, they went over a lot of the patterns and characteristics of a codependent person and a lot of them hit home.


• minimize, alter, or deny how they truly feel.

• perceive themselves as completely unselfish and dedicated to the well-being of others.

• express negativity or aggression in indirect and passive ways.

• do not recognize the unavailability of those people to whom they are attracted.

• have difficulty admitting a mistake.

• need to appear to be right in the eyes of others and may even lie to look good.

• are unable to identify or ask for what they need and want.

• have trouble setting healthy priorities and boundaries.

• are extremely loyal, remaining in harmful situations too long.

• compromise their own values and integrity to avoid rejection or anger.

• put aside their own interests in order to do what others want.

• attempt to convince others what to think, do, or feel.

• lavish gifts and favors on those they want to influence.

• have to feel needed in order to have a relationship with others.

• demand that their needs be met by others.

• use charm and charisma to convince others of their capacity to be caring and compassionate.

• use indirect or evasive communication to avoid conflict or confrontation.


Seeing the patterns of things I have done have really brought light to the work I need to do. I want to have successful relationships in the future. Relationships where I can set boundaries and say no. Where I can walk away when I'm being taken advantage of, lied to, manipulated. I need to be able to love myself in order to give that to somebody else, or accept it from anybody. I see a light at the end of the tunnel, and although I lost a lot, I think I may gain far more. Just wanted to get that off of my chest.

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