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I think you need to stop analyzing and stop second guessing, and go with the "I dodged a bullet" theory and move on with your life.


If you ultimately find yourself getting involved with another guy who does not have a felony conviction on record, and you find an irresistable urge to do a background check on him I suggest at that time you take a good hard look in the mirror and ask yourself what the problem really is.

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Well if you are continuing to decipher it from his point of view, then it doesn't matter (to him) that he's a criminal and a violent felon.


As he sees it, you were good relationship material and he saw a future with you until you went all psycho on him. He's had enough craziness in his life (because people like him tend to be magnets for the mentally unstable) and no matter how he felt about you he realized he had to get away from you as fast and as far as possible.

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This will answer a lot of your questions about him and his coming on strong, flying into a rage, evasiveness,etc.


The twenty traits assessed by the Hare Psychopathy Checklist score are:

glib and superficial charm

grandiose estimation of self

need for stimulation

pathological lying

cunning and manipulativeness

lack of remorse or guilt

shallow affect (superficial emotional responsiveness)

callousness and lack of empathy

parasitic lifestyle

poor behavioral controls

sexual promiscuity

early behavior problems

lack of realistic long-term goals



failure to accept responsibility for own actions

many short-term relationships

juvenile delinquency

revocation of conditional release

criminal versatility


Because psychopaths lie frequently and easily, the information they provide must be confirmed by a review of the documents in the subject's case history.

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So I am still learning this site.....


It's day 15 of no contact on either of our parts, and I'm so hung up and confused how he could do this after talking everyday for hours and discussing marriage, kids, and I'm the love of his life!? I apologized profusely for my part being insecure.


Can I salvage my mistake? How long no contact?



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I apologized profusely for my part being insecure.


Can I salvage my mistake? How long no contact?




When you apologize profusely for being insecure you are being even more insecure.


Can I salvage my mistake?


That's not up to you, it's up to him.


How long no contact?


Until you hear from him or the end of your natural life, whichever comes first.

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I'm not really so big on empathy but I'll try.


Honey I understand you're feeling down, and things seem hopeless but there IS life after this relationship. You need to be strong, and be patient and know that you were ok before him and you'll be ok after him. Things happen for a reason and one day you'll understand and things will be great!


(I don't really believe that things happen for a reason although they do happen as a result of cause and effect for example if you suddenly swerve and drive your car off a cliff it didn't happen because some bearded guy in the sky decided your time was up it's more because you're a lousy driver but nevermind I am trying to be empathetic here).



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