Should I trust her?

[inigele14u]

Wassup guys! I am posting this thread to get neutral and mature answers from the outside. Everything I put in here relates to reasons why I need your help on decision making. Please be brutally honest.

 

There's this girl that I've liked for quite awhile now. She is 22 and I am 21. We were best friends in high school, or you could say I was "friendzoned". She had moved to Florida at the end of her senior year by herself and had been through about three relationships. Her last relationship, the guy beat the **** out of her (really bad) and she had to flee to Indiana. In November she and I bought plane tickets to meet up in Florida so that we could get her stuff out of the guy's house who beat her up. Around that time, we stayed in a hotel together - nothing romantic took place. We do that, leave to go back home. We start talking about her moving back to Maryland (Where I am and where she is from) in a apartment with me for awhile. This still is the plan. Well, here's when the issues start popping up... We planned another trip to Atlantic City for Christmas, I have just come back from that. To make a long story as short as possible... We had sex five times. xD. "That escalated quickly". I beat the friendzone, oooooorrrrr I didn't. THIS IS WHAT SCARES ME. The second night when we were ****ing (we were drunk), I asked her how many partners she had. She told me ****ing..... ****ing.... "TEN" MY DUDE. I asked her when she had lost her virginity, she said at 18. So in four years she has slept/had sexual contact with ten guys... And her she is giving me a bj... and I'm just her friend.... This puts a special kind of stab in my "gut feeling" that she isn't relationship material. I did ask her if she had cheated before, she said no. But really who would say yes???

 

Additional Detail: Pretty much every day since right before I helped her in Florida she has been actively calling me, texting me, trying to skype me. We have been flirting and we did just ****. I guess another thing is she gave that cliche excuse that she has "so many guy friends because guys give less drama". I told her I wouldn't tolerate that **** ever, she's iffy about it. She's smart as hell, but also pretty secretive. She'll hold back even the tiniest bit of information away from her friends and family. I do realize and have told her that this guy that beat the **** out of her might have put her in a state of emotional distress. She might just be ****ing me because she is stressed? Idk... I have feelings for her, but man... What do yall think? Relationship or pass bro?

[gebaird]

Do you know much about her childhood? Sometimes girls who are neglected or abused by their parents (sexually or otherwise) will use sex as a way to feel loved or to try to fill an inner emptiness. I think a relationship with this girl, if she is even willing to try, would be very turbulent.

[inigele14u]

Her mother was very unreasonable and she has only seen her father a couple times. I think you might be spot on.

[annie24]

Why are you asking us if she is relationship material? You said you have been her best friend since high school, presumably you know her well enough to know if she would make a good girlfriend for you or not. i wouldn't recommend moving her in with you because so much can go wrong so quickly and then you will be in a bad position. I would try to help her find her own apartment, maybe a shared one with other women.

 

As for the 10 guys... I don't find it that alarming when you break it down, that's 2-3 guys per year on average, which doesn't seem incredibly excessive to me. Was she in a long term relationship at any point?

[Wiseman2]

Pass. She's nowhere near ready for a relationship. She just escaped a bad situation and she needs lots of time to get herself together. She's just clinging to any warm attentive helpful body for now.

[JaggerJim]

Pass. She nowhere near ready for a relationship. She just escaped a bad situation and she needs lots of time to get herself together. She's just clinging to any warm attentive helpful body for now.

 

LoL a warm body.