Not sure what to do.

[RC1998]

I'm 18 and my boyfriend in 27, we've been going out 4 months now but here are some issues that I've found:

 

1) Not respected - , child, fat etc.

2) Expected to pay for everything.

3) Doesn't show that he loves me - I'm always the one initiating everything.

4) Weird Internet history and sexual fetishes.

5) Talks to other gay guys.

6) Makes me feel like I'm not good enough - puts me down all the time, makes me feel bad.

7) Belittles my opinions - he always thinks he is right and tries to make me sound dumb.

8 ) No ambition - doesn't appreciate life or live it to the fullest.

9) Treats me like a child - and refers to me as a child on multiple occasions.

10) Cheated on me and I've cheated on him.

11) He found out where I live when I first started speaking to him.

12) He acts very suspiciously and has very strange sleeping patterns which makes me think he's hiding things - despite him working night shifts.

13) He has lied to me on multiple occasions - no trust. About sexual history, gay guys he speaks to and who he's been with. When I catch him out he says it's none of my business.

14) Very boring - lacks personality - always talks about history or films - both of which I'm not interested in.

15) Distance - I'm gonna be moving to London.

 

I broke up with him before and he wouldn't stop sobbing until I agreed to get back with him. I am also very lonely and don't have many friends, so without him I'd be even more lonely and depressed. He has also said to me that if I tried to break up with him he wouldn't let me. What should I do? I need advice

[arjumand]

Dump him, cut him off and go no contact. Then improve YOUR life so you don't feel the need to spend time with such a loser. Find activities that interest you and meet new people, do some volunteer work to make yourself feel better and more valued, work out, eat better. You will be amazed how in a couple of months how much happier you are.

[sparkles456]

I was about to say the same thing as above. It's better to be alone than be with someone who doesn't treat you right. All those issues you listed above are more than enough to break up with someone. The not letting you break up with him feels like a threat. Block him from everything and if he comes around I'd put a restraining order on him.

[melancholy123]

I agree with the people above. Dump this guy. Good that you are moving, dont give him your new address. Block and delete him every way you can.

[SooSad33]

Not sure if he 'loves' you? it has only been 4 months.. EVERYTHING is so new. Do not expect 'love' for a while...

 

You're the younger one.. but by sounds of it... it should be him!

 

I think, with you coming on here with these concerns, shows you KNOW that much you're saying.. is showing he is WRONG for you...

 

WHY you BOTH cheat on each other? I have NO idea... but that's ridiculous.. lack of respect & trust.. no good!

 

Anyways.. being a lier m cheater, controlling etc? No good.

 

As for the rest.. like YOUR lack of interest re: his likes... shows you're just NOT compatible... right?

 

So.... get away from this toxic person.... work on yourself for a while before moving on again.

[Capricorn3]

What should I do?

I'm surprised you have to ask. You leave. You clearly are not happy with this guy. I mean, when someone makes a 15 point list of negatives about their boyfriend and then asks "what should I do" ...well, it's pretty obvious what to do. With a list like that, sounds like you hardly like the guy. Also, barely 4 months in and hardly any time invested in the "relationship". Leave and move on.

 

I note you mention a couple of times "he talks to other gay guys". Are you two a gay couple? (Sorry, just thought it's rather odd that you mention the gay thing a few times).