Confused

[ashrenee11]

Hi everyone. I'm very new to this but I'm in need of some serious advice. So I'm basically caught between two men right

now. I'm currently in a relationship with a amazing man. We met at a social gathering about 4 months ago and have been going strong ever since... right before I met this man I was in a relationship of 5 years with another man and right before I met the man I am currently with, the 5 year man got arrested and was pinned up for 3 months. He is now currently out and we have seen eachother a couple times. He is madly in love with me but I'm not sure if I have the same feelings. When I'm not around him I miss him more than anything but when I'm with him I wanna be with the man I'm currently with (4 month guy) and when I'm with my current I sometimes wanna see my 5 year man. The one I'm with has way more going for himself than the other man does but that has never meant anything to me. It's about how I feel not materialistic things. So my question to everyone is what do I do? I can't play two guys... both of them love me and wanna be with me but I can't choose which one I really want to be with. How do I find out? Helpppppp plz

[Dpb]

It sounds like you miss the idea of him. They say always choose the 2nd man you fall in love with because if you were actually in love with the first you would've never fallen in love with the second....picture both of the men sitting a room, which one would you run to?

[Clio]

You are already playing them both from the sound of it. Choose neither or the second one. However, if the second one finds out about the cheating, then you are going to be in trouble. The healthiest option would be to break up with both and find someone you have never cheated. You don't like either of these men enough to stay faithful.

[Iggy5129]

The other guy was in jail for 3 months. I think it's safe to say he's not a good choice of partner.

[Wiseman2]

Do you think 5 yr. man is playing you for the post prison ride they all need? What was he arrested/jailed for?

 

Did it end when he got locked up and was 4 mos guy just filler? It's odd you started seeing him just as jail gut got locked up, no?

 

Do you have a thing for bad boys and 4 mos guy is "too nice". Do you think dating someone decent has confused your idea of what relationships could be like?

5 year man got arrested and was pinned up for 3 months. He is now currently out and we have seen eachother a couple times. The one I'm with has way more going for himself than the other man does but that has never meant anything to me.

[ashrenee11]

Dpb- thank you for ur response.... when you say pic both in a room who would I choose? We'll see that's my problem idk. In the whole 5 years I was with 5 year man I literally did everything. I took care of him. Then when he got locked up the 4 month man came and swooped in wanting to take care of me. I didn't allow it cause I'm not used too it. Plus my I believe it should always be equal between eachother.

 

Clio- thank you for your response, I don't consider myself cheating or that I cheated on the 4 month man. The 4 month man knows about the 5 year man, he actually sorta was a homie. But every time I went to see the 5 year man, the 4 month man always knew and I never hooked up or did anything that was disrespectful to my man.

 

Iggy5129- thank you for ur response. And yes ur right.

 

Wiseman2- thank you for ur response.... what do u mean post prison ride? I think the 5 year man is just used to having me and used to it always being me. He got locked up for drugs

No we technically didn't end when he got arrested. I was so pissed about his charges that I didn't write him or do anything when he was in jail. But 4 month man basically came to my rescue and at first my intentions with 4 month man was just to be friends. I didn't expect to fall for him. And yes I'm 27 years old who loves loves loves me some bad boys. But the 4 month man is sorta a bad boy well he used to be he's got his together now. But you might be right... I don't know how to feel when my man is super nice and respectful to me.

[Wiseman2]

Eventually you'll have to decide if you want prison guy or if there's better for you than drug dealers and users.

He got locked up for drugs And yes I'm 27 years old who loves loves loves me some bad boys. But the 4 month man is sorta a bad boy well he used to be he's got his together now. I don't know how to feel when my man is super nice and respectful to me.

[Clio]

Going back to a convicted drug dealer would be plain stupid. Don't go back to that. But you do need to set things straight with him. It sounds like you have not told him that you two are no longer an item. If he doesn t know about the break up and the 4month 'homie' he is going to be rightfully pissed when he finds out. He is going to feel betrayed. You need to clear up the situation with him asap. As for the second guy you need to give it more time for his true colors to show. At 4 months most people are on their best behaviour.