Confused about my feelings..

[renee9]

I still love my ex boyfriend. Like, I'd honestly do anything for him just to make him happy but he doesn't always make me happy but for some reason he continues to remain in my life. Im friends with him or I still follow and hes following me on all social media sites. He occassionally asks me to meet up with him and I do and it feels great but it doesn't feel like enough. When it gets close to the time I'm leaving I feel sad because I know that I'll have to wait another couple of weeks before he talks to me again and it hurts. My heart literally feels like its aching and Im so depressed and moody all the time... Its like hes the only person who can light up my day...

 

Recently ive been speaking to this new guy called Toni.. Toni's nice but he's not my ex. Im attracted to Toni but I'm scared to be with him, meet him or catch feelings for him because for one Im scared that my ex will turn around and says he still loves me and I reckon I would fall for him straight away and two Im scared that eventually like my ex, Toni will leave

 

I'd love some advice.. I just want to know what to do about my ex.

 

I want to know where we stand (as in will we get back together) and I wanna know how and what to say to him.

 

Also, I want to know why I feel so broken..

 

And how to let my guard down and give Toni a chance if my ex doesnt want me back..

 

Please help x

[Wiseman2]

Unfortunately as long as you continue to hang out as fwb, where you love him but he comes and goes as he pleases, you will be hurting.

 

He doesn't have to make up his mind about anything because when he's away from you he can date and sleep with whomever he wants because you are "broken up".

 

He told you he wasn't ready for a relationship...so he wants to enjoy his freedom and sleep around. How old is he? Maybe being exclusive just wasn't for him?

 

Meet Toni and if you like him date him.

He occassionally asks me to meet up with him and I do and it feels great but it doesn't feel like enough. When it gets close to the time I'm leaving I feel sad because I know that I'll have to wait another couple of weeks before he talks to me again and it hurts.

[gebaird]

I suspect you feel broken because your heart wants a real relationship, but instead you have a guy who comes and goes whenever he feels like it.

 

Stop contacting your ex, and stop waiting for him. If he wanted to be with you, he'd be with you. You're only delaying your own healing by continuing to be at his beck and call.

[katrina1980]

renee, living on hope that your FWB ex will somehow miraculously love you back and want a "relationship" with you is NO WAY to live.

 

I mean look what's happening already, you are depressed and moody, probably feel like you can't even function sometimes.

 

You need to get strong and cut it off. If you don't, you're headed for a long long road to never-never land with this guy.

 

It was just not meant to be.

 

Forget Toni as well. You are doing him (and yourself) a great disservice getting involved with him or any other man while still seeing and having these strong feelings for your ex.

 

I would not waste any energy asking your ex where you stand or anything else.

 

You already KNOW the answer, you're just not ready to accept it so you catapult yourself into denial and insist on still seeing him (as FWB which is INSULTING), and living on hope and a fantasy.

 

Why do this to yourself? Are you some sort of masochist? I am sure you are not so TAKE CARE OF YOU.

 

No one else will (especially your ex) that's for darn sure.

 

Walk away and work on yourself and these feelings of worthlessness within you.

 

Yes it will be hard, but you will come out the other side stronger than before.

 

Remember, we make mistakes (and this one is a doozie), we learn for those mistakes, we grow, we evolve.

 

Best of luck on your new journey FORWARD.