Friend dislikes bf/she has never actually met him?

[Person1001]

I haven't been dating my boyfriend for very long. He treats me well, loves me and cares about me. We are long distance, so most of my friends have not met him. The thing is my best friend got offended by what he posted online because he has different beliefs and outlook on life. He has never personally attacked her or her beliefs, He is coming down to see me and I am super excited, but my friend might not even come over for a party I'm throwing because my boyfriend will be there. I actually haven't mentioned to her about me wanting her to meet him, as the only time she would see him would be at my party (I want a lot of alone time w/my bf). I have never pushed my friend to meet him or like him. My boyfriend isn't going anywhere and I'm not going to stop dating him just because someone was offended. Opinions?

[j.man]

Without knowing to what extremes your boyfriend may be posting polarizing opinions, all you can really do is let the chips fall where they may. I wouldn't involve yourself in a dramatic balancing act. Your boyfriend will be in town, she's welcome to join you two at the party, and that's that. It's her own problem she needs deal with, not yours.

[rosephase]

What are the things he posted that upset her?

[greta96]

If she chooses not to come, let her. Don't even insist, you only invite her once and the rest is up to her. If she is determined to dislike your boyfriend and to hold a grudge over something so insignificant, then she would only ruin your party - why let her? Besides, it may not even be that she's offended, she may be plain jealous of the fact that you met a great guy!

You just do your part (inviting her), and the rest is up to her and how much value she places on your friendship.

[Wiseman2]

Unfortunately your friend is being silly and making trouble. People post all sorts of stuff online and if she doesn't like it, so what?

 

Let her not come to the party, it's really her problem. Is this friend typically such a drama-queen?

The thing is my best friend got offended by what he posted online because he has different beliefs and outlook on life. my friend might not even come over for a party I'm throwing because my boyfriend will be there.

[Person1001]

Unfortunately your friend is being silly and making trouble. People post all sorts of stuff online and if she doesn't like it, so what?

 

Let her not come to the party, it's really her problem. Is this friend typically such a drama-queen?

 

No she isn't typically, though I think another incident has caused all this BS. I had a falling out w/a mutual friend (we no longer speak to each other), she stopped including me in group activities despite the fact that I never said anything hurtful or mean to her, I just had my opinions posted on my page, again not attacking anyone in particular. Though when I 1st went to meet my bf a couple of months back(we met online), she expressed her concerns because of stuff posted online. After I met him I told her he was a nice guy.

[DancingFool]

It's a free world. He is free to post, she is free to feel offended. Her and your bf do not need to like each other and you definitely shouldn't be in the middle of that. Don't play mediator because it will just backfire on you.

 

So invite her to the party and leave her to decide what she wants to do. Don't push them to get along, rather leave them to sort each other out. If he is a great guy, hopefully eventually she will see it. If she decides to become a bad friend to you and force a wedge between you and your bf, you can always distance yourself away from her and find new friends. For right now, see how things play out.

[Wiseman2]

Look up "Frenemy".

I think another incident has caused all this BS. she stopped including me in group activities. when I 1st went to meet my bf a couple of months back(we met online), she expressed her concerns because of stuff posted online.

[catfeeder]

There are no rules that say your friends must like your lover or visa versa. Best I'd do is invite friend to my party; she can either attend or not, but she doesn't get veto power over my guest list.